Blue Berets

34. Strange Behavior

The night was getting late, but the three girls still survived with their activities. Sometimes Lucy is seen replying to messages coming from her lover while Kirana is not much different. He always looked at the phone he was charging next to him. While Ningrum who is still single wants to wait for news from whom? He could only smile with his heart because he was somewhere now.

"If it's so Ning why?” asked Lucy who first realized Ningrum was a little moody.

"No upset. Just a bit sad, you two already have a partner that I am still single,” said Ningrum.

"Yes look for it,” replied Lucy.

"Ningrum does not want to go after Ci, but there is something waiting for. Yes, I do deh” said Kirana who knew if Ningrum had been liking someone.

“Kok you can know anyway Ki?”

“What the hell does Kirana not know,” says Kirana prides herself.

“Iyain.”

"Who the hell is Ning? Dong story. Which boy? Our college boy?” ask Lucy to start kepo.

"There you are, college boy. But I don't really know where he works now,” said Ningrum.

"Keep still in contact?”

“Ngak. Never intense contact but like he is now busy with his cooperation so it is rare. Tau tau also once twice,” replied Ningrum.

"Aren't you afraid of regretting an uncertain wait?” ask Lucy.

“They want to move on, but my heart can't. The more I try to forget, the more I remember and it hurts Cy. I don't want to, let it be. Let time answer will be what my destiny and her,” said Ningrum.

“Something will surely be missed. Look at me, for years I finally got to be with Bang Adnan,” Lucy said.

"Cy, why don't you ever get mad at me? Bang Adnan long deketin you right because of me,” asked Kirana who quite suddenly.

"Kok suddenly it's Ki?”

"Jawab it, Lucy. I want to know your opinion,” urged Kirana.

"No. Why am I angry with you? You are never wrong.”

"If the choice of Bang Adnan was his principle. I can only support and wait. Your brother never gave me empty hope. He just asked me to wait. I agree anyway. Because I don't want to be happy alone. The three of us will start our dreams together. So I want when our dreams are realized we are still together too,” said Kirana who then pulled Ningrum and Kirana into her arms.

The three girls continued the conversation until quite late at night. Finish one film over another. From comedy to romance they watch it all. The point is that they really enjoyed the three of them reminiscing about the past where they often gathered in this place to accompany Lucy because it was left behind by both parents who were busy with their respective affairs.

The ningrum who was already full immediately climbed onto the sofa then pulled the blanket over. She was never as strong as Kirana and Lucy in staying up late. The girl always went to bed earlier than the others.

"Cy, I want to confide in you.” Kirana said.

“Why not from earlier anyway?”

"It's about Bang Adnan and Bang Raihan. I was actually hesitant to ask but thought for a long time too,” Kirana said.

“You want to ask what?”

“Last Bang Raihan never talked about Bang Adnan. A few times I took her to Mama's house too Brother must have avoided. Is Bang Adnan the same Bang Raihan fighting again huh?” ask Kirana.

"How weird?”

"dither. Don't go ahead first. I don't want to hear about your family business, I sleep in my room, yes,” said Ningrum who interrupted. Not until Lucy and Kirana answered, Ningrum who was still half-asleep stepped into Lucy's room while carrying the blanket she had worn. He does not close the door and does not turn off the lights but Kirana and Lucy know that the girl has returned soundly in a dream.

"Bang Adnan has been talking lately about you and Bang Raihan,” Lucy said.

"Never before?” ask Kirana.

Lucy shook her head, “Bang Adnan is not the type of man–laki who likes to talk about the condition of his family at home to couples. Well only occasionally if there's good news or what she's going to tell stories but never as often as this,” Lucy said.

“Gelagat Bang Adnan every time I meet I also weird Cy. What do you think is it?”

“I don't understand anyway,” said Lucy.

"Eh but Bang Raihan is good right with you?” ask Lucy.

“Good. But yes, it is,”

“Ya how is it?”

"It's actually a secret but it's weird that I don't tell stories" Kirana said.

"Just tell Ki, God willing I can keep a secret" Lucy replied.

"Bang Raihan has never touched me at all. My mind went everywhere. No matter my brother is always convincing but always bewildered the thought that you do not want to touch me because I am not clean," said Kirana.

"Gosh, why did you think so Ki. Lah ngak. Bang Raihan you always say be honest. If he says no yes no. Don't think weird ah you," said Lucy.

“How did I not think I was rich? I am in the same torment as myself. I'm confused as to what I should do to pay for my mistakes. The brother is a normal human being, and the desires of men are all the same. No one wants to accept a girl who is not clean rich I," Kirana said again. Her crying was no longer contained now.

"Kirana, stop. There are many men out there who are willing to marry widows. Not every man wants to unseal his wife. After all, we are married for worship not for mere napsu," said Lucy who tried to increase the confidence of her best friend.

Lucy may be right, not all men expect the virginity of his wife on the first night. Some have buried the desire deeply because of its clearness to accept the condition. But there's something Lucy doesn't know. Raihan, Kirana's husband craves it. Kirana found out accidentally when she heard Raihan chatting with her papa. From there Kirana knows many lies that Raihan deliberately made in order to protect his wife's feelings. Just so Kirana doesn't get hurt.

Several times Kirana tried to bravely approach her husband first, but every time both of her lips came close and her eyes closed, the memory would instantly flare up again making her frightened and crying. His body even responded superbly. Many times Kirana ends up fainting or getting sick if she gets too bold. 

“I feel sorry for Bang Raihan, Cy.” said Kirana who returned to shed her tears.

“How about you consult your psychiatrist first? Maybe he can help,” said Lucy.

“The plan is so. The next day I'll check up at the hospital and consult my psychiatrist. But I didn't tell Bang Raihan. I don't know why you always forbid me. He said he didn't want me to be sad or hurt. The incident was too painful and Brother himself actually did not want to remember it anymore,” Kirana said.

“Will I keep it a secret. Oh yeah, you went to the hospital by yourself? Want me to accompany?”

“No need papa. I've asked for the company of Aunt Ratna kok,” said Kirana.

“Tante Ratna?”

“Hmm, his wife om Aji Papa's co-worker. Since I was a child, if I had anything, Aunt Ratna would have treated me. Though he is a cancer specialist but still willing to be a family doctor for me,” said Kirana.

“Kirana, you are actually lucky. Never be discouraged again. There are so many people who love you. So you should be able to straighten your shoulders. Lift up your chin and tell the world if you are a strong woman,” Lucy said.