Aretta & Secrets

Counsellors

"All right." He suddenly said a little loud and made me turn to him immediately, "if you want to tell me about what happened to you, I promise I will not record and make a recording of this. So.. how?" tanyanya tried to lure me to open my mouth.

I opened my mouth, but not a single sound came out. There was only thirst filling my throat. I gestured Mr. Aidan to give me a drink. The first time I wanted to drink was so I could communicate both ways with him.

His eyes widened slightly and chuckled as he forgot the most important thing for the newly conscious person from fainting. He muttered something my ears could not hear while walking out of his room. When the door opened I could see the rainbow with the counselor on the door of the room..

As soon as he left, I started to panic. How does he know I'm getting violence at home? I never reported about Mama tormenting me all this time because I felt I could still accept everything. Sometimes I feel like I deserve it because after all I feel like the reason that made Paoa leave us was me.

I don't feel like I have to make this a case either because after all she's my mom. The one who's been with me for nine months and the one who's been taking care of me since I was a kid. How could I have the heart to tell the crime of Mama who when she gave birth to me she had already risked her life.

I know what Mr. Aidan meant by offering this because he's my teacher. He just wanted to make sure his students lived a comfortable school life. I'm still trying to rack my brain to give you a good reason because Mr. Aidan will be back here any minute. I knew he wouldn't stay silent after seeing me faint and however I had to open my mouth to keep him from scolding me. I've decided I'll talk about something else that's a little bit pertinent even though it's filled with lies if he asks later.

The door was wide open and Mr. Aidan appeared with a disheveled appearance. Sweat ran through his temple, it seemed like he had run out. He holds a bottle of water and a slice of cheese cake that is impossible to find at school. I knew there was a bakery across the street and he was sweating because he had to walk across the street and had to go back to school quickly.

Knowing she did that for me made me a little uncomfortable. There's one strange feeling I can't explain and it's a new feeling I can't explain.

He handed me the bottle of mineral water and bread.

"You should eat and drink this first. And usually fainting is because you don't have energy. Please eat" he said.

"Thank you sir" I said in a raucous voice as I picked up the things he had thrust at me. I finished my meal quickly because I didn't want to make him wait too long.

"Aretta's. I know you're going to have a hard time telling a story because you've never been counseled before. You just have to tell me slowly. I will not force you to open your mouth. I'll wait for you to tell me by yourself. I'm here to help you, that's what you should know." He said it carefully and touched me. Her tone was gentle and attentive which I had never heard before. I may have heard this tone as a child, but never again since Papa left.

"Sometimes, I forget to eat," I said as soon as I opened my mouth, "my mind usually wanders around because of many things. I like to run and usually when I'm done running I also forget to eat and drink."

I have decided to tell a story, not much and not too little because it will still raise suspicion if it does not suit my circumstances.

Mr. Aidan's brows furrowed slightly before he asked, "Usually to what extent do you run?"

"Are you serious? Even a marathon is not that far, after all there is a gym at school why you do not use the facility." He raised his tone of voice that made me flinch. Mr. Aidan seemed to be conscious and he immediately lowered his voice.

"Aretta, how do you think I feel as a teacher. Stuck with a student who lacks nutrients that will affect not only health but education as well."

"Mothers don't need to feel guilty. You don't have to do anything either. Just like before because it's not your problem."

I immediately stood up, thanks to Mr. Aidan my strength has recovered. I picked up my bag that was near my feet. It feels heavy because there are additional uniforms there.

"Thank you again for your attention. If I am having trouble, I will go to you myself" I said firmly before opening the door and stepping out of the room. As I was about to get to the turn I heard a step following me from behind.

"Remember! The door of my room will always be open for you Aretta" cried Mr. Aidan.

I paused for a moment and then resumed my steps. No matter how persistent he tried because surely the edges he would also give up by himself.

After changing my clothes in the bathroom, I started to step through the classroom and realized that the class had already run half. I can't possibly go in. I glanced at my watch, after this biology lesson. My mood instantly shattered. The hateful gazes of Jessi and her friends plus the menacing gazes of the Lord God completely ruined my comfortable life. I decided to skip it, not follow that lesson.

I stepped towards the main gate and walked out from there. No one tried to stop me, probably because no one noticed. I took this opportunity to escape. It was a great relief to be an almost invisible human being.

I walk home. The sun had gone up but the light was not so burning. The weather today is cloudy and makes the wind blow refreshing.

When I got home there was no one there. I opened the door with the key I had duplicated and immediately walked towards my room. I decided not to go anywhere. It's raining tonight and I don't want to be stuck outside.

I started to clean my room. The thing I always do when my mind is upset and my heart is not calm. I had no one to complain to and the only option was to do something that would help remove the burden on my heart.

I swept and mopped back the floor that I had cleaned the previous day. Replace curtains and sheets to change the atmosphere.