Your charms are diverting my love

Not my Territory

Tonight, mom and dad sleep in my house. From this afternoon my mother kept persuading me not to file divorce papers. I'm tired, but do I have to give up? I gave up, for two people who love each other. Why would I live with Mas Dani, if it turns out that he can't love me, and is still shackled by his past?

“You really want to sue Dani?” ask Dad.

“Iya, Dad. Forgive Vita, Vita failed in the household. Mumpung Vita has not come far with Mas Dani, Well,” I replied.

“What not to think about first, Vit? Don't make decisions when it's like this. Cool your mind first, don't go straight,” said father.

“Did I have to torture deeper into my inner self I just parted with Mas Dani, Dad? I don't want to when I'm comfortable, happy, then fall down again. Enough of my heart was tossed around by Mas Dani, Dad. I'm still filing for divorce, and tomorrow I'm going to see my friend who's a lawyer.”

I'm sticking to my stance, I'll still sue Mas Dani, before I fall too deep with this feeling. I love Mas Dani, but if he doesn't love me why do I survive?

“Vit, I'm not on your side, but it's true what your father said. You need to calm your heart first, so don't be rash to make decisions. Okay, your best decision is to split up, but give it a pause, you have to think again, it's really the best decision or not, don't immediately decide divorce, tomorrow you go straight to the religious court. Better, you calm your mind first, you refresh where the cake is, and think again, how good,” said mother.

I know, everyone doesn't want me to part with Mas Dani. I don't want to, but Mas Dani doesn't love me. The proof is, he wanted to learn to love me, but met Nadira until he forgot what he just said last night? He was immediately happy when Nadira arrived home, Mas Dani immediately hugged him, kissed him, and forgot about me he promised, that he would learn to love me.

It might be true, Mother, that I should calm my mind first. Because what's in my brain right now, divorce, divorce, divorce, then I'll tell Arif about this, let him sympathize with me. And if I come to this, I will drop my dignity as a woman. No, I can't do this, I have to think about it again with a clear and uncluttered mind like this. I have to see how Mas Dani struggles when he wants me home.

He wasn't tired of sending me messages and asking me to go home. He just wrote me an apology in every message, and asked me to go home. Maybe there are hundreds of messages from Mas Dani that I only read, I did not reply. Maybe the phone's been hundreds of times, but I didn't answer. I'm sure he's home in a mess thinking about me. Let it be, I can't be weak, let me teach him a lesson first.

My mom sent me a message too. My mom asked me to come home. Mas Dani from earlier said he just sat on the bed looking at my picture and crying. I just smiled, my mom said that in her chat. Let it be, let him feel it. Let Mas Dani know how painful it is now that I'm not coming home and I don't want this marriage to be back in one piece.

“Ma, just say the same Mas Dani, why go home? To be a maid at home? Serving the needs Mas Dani, cleaning, cooking, washing clothes, washing dishes, mopping? Why didn't Nadira change it? He deserves to do that, because he's the one that Mas Dani loves. While me? I am his wife, loved and loved not even a maid!”

I don't care, I sent a message to my mom so, I'm tired. Mama had agreed to sue Mas Dani for divorce, but now see the state of Mas Dani who said sliced, asking me to go home? Don't you know the same with my heart? Mother and father also, instead told me to postpone this divorce. I don't want to, my resolve is unanimous, I have to part with Mas Dani.

^^^

This afternoon I finished seeing a lawyer, I've filed for divorce, I don't want to delay the time. Let me not talk to mom and dad, mom and dad. Before I part with Mas Dani too, I have to finish all my duties in papa's office, before everything is transferred to Mas Dani, or papa again. I have to be professional, I can't be a coward.

I went straight to Mas Dani's house after seeing a lawyer and to the Religious Court filed a lawsuit. I know Mas Dani at home, Mama said Mas Dani didn't go to school, because he wasn't feeling well. Mama also did not bus menamani, because mom accompanied papa out of town since this morning. I stopped my car in front of Mas Dani's house. It's right Mas Dani's car is outside, I get off and I go inside. The door is not in the key, I look in the kitchen, there is cooking, maybe mama cooks for Mas Dani, and I look into the room. I saw Mas Dani sitting on the bed facing the window. I heard her sobs, and occasionally said my name.

“Vita, I'm sorry. Home, Vit. I promise I'll love you, go home, Vit? Please don't go, don't divorce me, Vita ...”

Mas Dani kept repeating those words many times, he cried while looking at our wedding photo, and the photo when we were in Anyer yesterday. I also saw Mas Dani's food still intact on the small table in his room. He was sick, he also had to take medicine, but the food was intact. Mama here even seems not to care about the situation Mas Dani. Even though his son is sick.

“Mas ...” I called Mas Dani, he slowly twisted his body to look for the source of the sound.

“Vi—Vita? Is this really not a dream? You home, Vit? You're Vita, right? I don't dream?” He said with a tremble. His body trembled, his face was haggard, his eyes were puffy, and a complete mess of my husband who was handsome, handsome, and so seductive.

“Iya, it's me Vita, Mas,” I replied.

“Yakin? You didn't lie? And, I don't dream, do I?”

“No, Mas,” answered.

Mas Dani came down from his bed, he walked towards me with a stagger, and finally arrived before me. She hugged me tightly, kissed me on the cheek, then hugged me again, and cried, roaring while apologizing. Then he lowered his body, he rested at my feet, and would kiss my feet, apologizing.

“Mas, don't gini.” I immediately crouched down, and hugged her.

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Vita. Please don't go again, okay? Don't go, Vit.” He said with a glare, and full of hope.

I can't bear to see it, do I have to give you this lawsuit? At a time when Mas Dani is like this?

“Don't go Vita, I beg you. I'll fix everything. I-i promise. I love you, Vita. Really love you. I beg you to remain my wife, do not leave, do not divorce me,” she said on the sidelines of her cries.

“I'm here, yes I'm not leaving. I still work in your office, who says I left, this morning I went to the office. Thank you for yesterday, for replacing me leading the meeting,”, I said. “You've woken up, you haven't eaten, have you?” my many.

“But.”

“Yes have you woken up, would I like to order some food, or this food on the table?” my many.

“That's mama who made, but usually mama quickly want to go, business, mama put it there, then go,” replied Mas Dani.

Mama always had no time for Mas Dani, just deserved Mas Dani not so close to mama?

“Papa who asked mama quickly, so do not feed me and just membujuku papa directly ask mama to come with papa, even though mama still seems to want to be here,” said Mas Dani.

I still don't care about Mas Dani. Maybe papa was already disappointed with Mas Dani, who was always against him, so papa was so with him.

“Yes I've had a bribe, Mas. Take your medicine before you eat it, right? I'll get you a minute.” I took the medicine box that I still live in the kitchen from yesterday afternoon, when there was Nadira.

“Come drink first.” I gave it to Mas Dani.

Mas Dani drank it, after which, he pulled my arm, and asked me to sit next to him. “Do not go here only,” pinta Mas Dani.

“Iya I'm here.” My answer.

Mas Dani rested his head on my arm. He hugged me tightly, like he was afraid I would leave again.

“Vit, will you keep divorcing me?” ask Mas Dani.

“Maybe, Mas,” I replied.

“Is there no more chance for me, Vit?” ask Mas Dani.

“What if I give you a chance, I won't repeat it again? Won't see Nadira again?”

“She's gone, yesterday afternoon. He has officially transferred duties, and today he is no longer teaching here anymore,” replied Mas Dani. “I beg you to start from the beginning huh, Vit?” pinta Mas Dani's.

“I don't promise, Mas,” I answer.

“Alright, if that's my decision. But, I ask that as long as you take care of the divorce process, you are here huh?”

“Can't dong mas? I can't be here, but I'm still finishing my work at the office, so we can still meet,” I replied. “Sorry, actually I was seeing a lawyer, I have filed a lawsuit, Mas,”.

Mas Dani was silent, I heard her sobbing, she grabbed my hand and kissed her. “I'm sorry yes, Vit. I accept your decision. I know how you feel, I've scratched too much of a wound in your heart. I'm sorry,” said Mas Dani sobbing.

I took my bag, and took out a brown envelope with divorce papers. “This mas.” I gave it to Mas Dani.

“Later to sign, Vit,” he said.

“Yes already, I bribe mas, yes?” I took the food, and I fed it.

“It feels bland, Vit,” he said.

“You're not feeling well anymore, Mom. So yes the food is tasteless,” I replied.

“Not my body hurts, my heart hurts, Vit.”

“Because of Nadira's departure?”

“Not, because you will go,” he replied. “I love you, Vit.”

“That fast, Mas?” my many.

“Yes, this is what I feel, actually since that night in Anyer, I have fallen in love with you, Vit,” replied Mas Dani.

“What kind of love is that? You just yesterday afternoon still say you love Nadira very much, in front of Nadira?” my spoken.

“I don't know, I did have a hard time choosing between you and him. She was my first love, and you were my parents' best choice. Ever since we've been together, I've been comfortable, scared you're gone, feeling this heart at ease with you, and I'm sure I can already love you, it's true. You go it feels different to me letting go of Nadira,” explained Mas Dani.

I just kept quiet. I really didn't think Mas Dani said he loved me. But I see he really meant it. Let it be, I'll stick to my stance, break up with him.

“Let me love you even if we're separated later, Vita?” ask Mas Dani.

“That's your right, Mas. Want to love me until when you want, I don't forbid it,” I replied.

“Do you still love me, Vit?” ask Mas Dani.

“Yes I still love you so much, Mas,” I replied honestly.

“Then why did you ask for divorce?” ask Mas Dani.

“Because I know your heart is still unstable. I'm just afraid that when we're okay with the household, you meet Nadira again, and continue your story again. I will definitely lose, because he is your first love,” I replied.

“No will, Vit. I wouldn't be like that. For God's sake I love you so much, Vit. I choose you, I choose your heart, Vit,” said Mas Dani sincerely.

“But I will still want to split, Mas. Because I was too afraid of heartache again,” I replied.

“Ya already if it is your decision,” said Mas Dani.

“Come one more bribe, out of it take the medicine, and I compress the body mas,”.

“You want to compress my body?”

“Yes, I am still your wife's legal, before the court decides we are divorced,” I replied.

I went back, put the dishes and prepared some warm water after feeding Mas Dani, and took the medicine. I know, Mas Dani really expressed his feelings earlier, but I have decided to separate, rather than later I hurt again, because he is unstable. The proof, yesterday said he wanted to learn to love me, but he even did that with Nadira?

I went into Mas Dani's room again, I put the warm water in the container to clean Mas Dani's body. “This is my face first mas.” I said.

After cleaning his face, I asked Mas Dani to take off his clothes. I didn't let her take a shower, because her temperature was high again like yesterday.

“Sorry yes, Vit,” he said.

“Iya. I'm gonna clear your body, okay?” my spoken.

Oh, my God, why is this weird. I can't be nervous, I'm just helping to clean her up.

“Mas can go to the bathroom, right?” my many.

“Can, why, Vit?”

“Emm ... The bottom cleaner yourself in the bathroom, yes?”

“Why not all?”

“Ish ... not my territory, Mas,” I replied.

“But this is yours, Vit.”

“Narang! Your people too? Already there to the bathroom! I'll get your clothes ready, here's the towel. All brush your teeth,” I said.

“Iya, Dear ..”

“Honey nutmeg lo peyang!” my tukas.

“Do not want to be called darling?”

“Your darling is fake!”

“What if original? Want, right?”

“It was there to the bathroom, before I changed my mind to go again!” My threat.

“Ih don't dong, yes I went to the bathroom.”

Mas Dani rushed to the bathroom, I took his clothes. And, I was surprised by the messy state of his closet.

“Gosh ... just left me for a day like this? Especially a month?” I was upset by seeing the state of Mas Dani's closet.