SURVIVING BECAUSE OF STATUS

CHAPTERS 16. BIRTHDAY PRESENT

How will I live my life after this. I felt like yesterday I was the queen of my own home. But now, my days are more familiar with heartache, disappointment, anger, hate. Can be patient but will never be sincere, what should be mine will forever be so.

The incident coming home from the invitation of the olip still looms over my head. How can they do it in the guest room. Can't resist the urge after returning the invitation. Letting me both with Rania was already hurting, plus the view in the family room .

Walk quickly put Rania in bed, down to resolve the anger I've been holding.

“Can't you understand my feelings just a little bit huh...!!!”my voice filled the whole corner of this house I don't care.

“ the way you hurt me is perfect. Leaving me alone with Rania, can't be patient until we go home” my breath hunts down the heat in my throat. A sharp look with bulging eyes complemented my anger.

“ a month more you guys I let the roommate sleep, and during that time my husband never touched me, what it was still lacking. What animal passions that possess you until the veins of shame just do not have a” search for a moment to dispel the tightness, breathe to fill the lungs.

“And one more thing, in this house we never had the disgusting show, how my husband became a priest for his wife even inappropriate impressions are allowed now, since when?” my screams grew louder, my tears flowing down just like that. Maybe right now I'm like the devil and his people, or like a possessed man. I don't give a shit.

“If you want to do that don't be at this house, find somewhere else. The five years I've been guarding this house makes it like heaven to us, nothing but wishing that God would bless every corner of this house and you would just come and ruin it. How can I believe my husband can be fair, even for bigini alone he can not guide his wife”

“And for you cheap women do not bring your bad habits to this house, in this house I am in power because until now I am still the legal wife of mas Amir if you forget” I point my finger at him. Care for the devil with manners. The woman looked down inside.

“Pardon mas fira, mas khilaf” ahirnya voice also my husband . Regretting, it feels impossible, all I catch is feeling bad. Not feeling guilty.

“so this is what makes you go home first because it is busy, it turns out to be very busy. If you can't, just one. Don't force myself” I turned towards the voice, bang fatih. Allahu..until you forget that there is still in the guest room.

“He who drove you home?” I saw anger on my husband's face, his jaw hardened. Instantly his eyes turned red.

“iya, I delivered the child and wife you abandoned for the sake of the woman, mind?” bang fatih was no less angry. His eyes were staring at Mas Amir.

“learn yourself from now on. If you know this way you treat syafira why don't you return him well to his family as when you came to ask him well at that time” walked closer to the mas Amir and Andara who are still standing sculpting.

“you have broken your promise to take good care of him, I ask permission to bring back shafira to his family. Don't bother dropping off, I'll take her home” their faces facing each other just as tense. The woman looked down deeper.

I stared at the fatih bang can't believe I approached him by closing both hands on his chest.

“don't bang, I want to be here. Fira hope brother did not tell this to mom and dad, pity them” my face is clear, tears are rushing. Repeatedly being hurt repeatedly I defended the man. And the man I defended just lowered his head, amazingly not.

“Fira, contact your brother if this man still hurts you. Excuse me” bang fatih passed I know he holds anger in his chest.how I will straighten his face before him. The person I defended had already opened his own disgrace.

A month has passed since that incident. That means two months even I'm in honey. If anyone asks me how my heart is, it's still as broken to pieces. The woman became more and more, feeling the defense of Amir mas behavior increasingly uncontrollable. And my relationship with Mas Amir is getting awkward, we're more silent.

The clothes are getting more open, in front of me and Rania. I had trouble teaching rania about temperament and politeness. The woman ruined it. Sometimes it's hard to answer a five-year-old's questions about what he sees.

Wearing bright dyes on his long nails. Clothes are increasingly lacking in materials. Go with clothes that are beyond sexy. And that was never reprimanded by my husband. How does my husband love that woman? all his wishes are fulfilled without exception. There is no “no” word if you want something.

“Rania want long nails in paint kayak aunt Andara can” asked Rania at that time

“don't love rania still small” simple answer that if it can be digested by a child my daughter's age.

another bad influence of the woman. How do I explain it. How his parents educated him. It's not a matter of long nails painted. The long nails block the arrival of ablution water to the skin under the nails. One more, not once did I see Andara praying.

Departing in the afternoon, returning home at night, get together with friends he said. I don't know, and it got a good response from my husband weird isn't it. I, let alone go out, leave Mas Amir after work alone can not bear. Getting together with my husband and children is my own happiness. That was before the riot-carrying woman came to my family

Drizzle still fell after the rain soaked the earth, I just came home after queuing and shelter waiting for the rain to subside in the fried rice tent subscription with Rania. I don't know why my daughter suddenly wants to eat fried rice. Riding a motorbike matic slow because the road is still slippery after the rain. Rania stood in front. Open the fence and close it again. I was stunned for a moment, a new car maroon color parked beautifully lined up behind the car mas amir who had been there. since when he came home. Entering the house to the dining table. It was 7 pm last time leaving at 6, one hour I waited for the rain to subside.

“Rania eat in front of the TV can, want to see the cartoon mother” take a spoon plate, open a pack of fried rice thrusting to Rania who has been sitting sweet to see her favorite show.

“eatnya do not mess yes, mother want to take a drink first” walk take drinking water pour into the glass. I saw Mas Amir coming out of his room. Gets glimpses. I approached Rania with a drink in her hand. I saw my husband sitting next to Rania stroking her hair gently. Rania sat on the carpet under her father sitting on the sofa near Rania.

“sorry I did not cook the mas, Rania asked to buy fried rice, I have prepared for the same mas Andara at the dinner table” said me slowly

“it's okay mas already eat” Mas Amir looked at me deeply, his eyes were sad, I don't know what he was thinking, long we looked at until I avoided his gaze.

“thank you kadonya ya Han, I'm happy today” suddenly came hugging the friendly hand mas Amir. Without telling me what the gift was, I guessed it. A very special gift that my husband has never given me.

This back pain whack, great fair treatment my husband. Don't buy me a car, give me permission to learn to drive just don't. Mas Amir's grievous wound to me. It feels like this heart has begun to numb from unfairness. Hopefully we will get used to it.

“ with you I feel appreciated again as a woman, I am not wrong to return with you, it turns out your love is still like the old” the woman leaned her fist onto Mas Amir's shoulder. So sweet they're not even awkward in front of Rania. If it was his purpose to hurt me. But to provoke my anger failed. I can hold it now.

“We should have asked Rania as Sister Syafira also ate, all celebrating my birthday. If the race was more fun” he looked at me

“rania just ate yes, sorry yes aunt earlier g ngajak Rania show suddenly” from earlier her mouth can not stop talking.I'm sure the real purpose of this woman to show off.

I am still silent, what needs to be responded even Rania was just smiling looking at Andara, her mouth full of fried rice looks very funny.

“makan slow, later when finished toothbrush continues bobok” rub my son's head gently, Raniaku nods. I sometimes forget that my daughter is the greatest gift. By looking at his smile alone the pain of Mas Amir's betrayal was reduced.

I glanced at my husband who was sitting in a row with you, many times he took a heavy breath. Not once was his wife's babble responded. Just a faint smile that he directed. Strangely enough, he should be happy to see his beloved woman happy. Even that smile can't be separated from your lips.

“Mother” Rania gave her plate to me I handed her a glass filled with water.

“Smart” boy Rania drinking water rubbed his head slowly.

“Han, I uploaded this nice photo not” I glanced through the tail of my eyes, Andara showed her phone. Still with the ocehnnnya, choose a good photo that will be uploaded. Occasionally look upset because many of his photos are not appropriate. Some choose fat, less smile. The style is not good and there are many more I do not care.

“Mother brush your teeth, Rania sleepy”his eyes look red, I don't know Rania's closeness with her father is also not like before, my daughter is like keeping her distance from her father. Perhaps the change in her father's attitude affected Rainia.

“oke dear” took Rania with a dish and a cup of kitchenware, passing two happy creatures. My husband looks at me, whatever he has in mind, I don't know.

his wife's chatter about uploading unheeded photos.his gaze is sad on me. Keep looking at me who passed from before him. Finished washing the dishes to bring Rania to her room. Toothbrush, reading fairy tales is my habit every night. After sleeping I replaced the lamp with a dimmer sleep lamp, so that his sleep was sound.

Amir bought me such an expensive gift for my honey? yes, but I know myself enough. That woman has a special part in my husband's heart, she deserves it all because Mas Amir wants it. And I can't prevent it, enough to be a good wife. Then the face of the father and mother will remain upright in front of neighbors and relatives. Let this suffering and pain be my responsibility.

Back to room. Clean yourself then pray obligatory. Preparing to lay down before the end of the door opened, the figure of my husband appeared there. cleaned himself and then lay next to me. My eyes were not closed, I looked next to him and suddenly he turned to face me.

His gaze was still the same as before. There was a cloud hanging until finally the clear droplets wet the end of his eyes. I sat in shock.What's wrong with my man. She should be happy now, but what I see is this.

“can Dad hug mom?, Dad tired” huh, what's this?

Without waiting for my answer she pulled my hand, hugged me, leaned my head against her field caressing my head and kissed the soft end of my head. There was no sound of a word coming out of his lips, just a deep and heavy breath I felt.

Apparently sleeping in his chest is still as comfortable as before. There is peace that feels right down to the deepest recesses of the heart. Once I am weak, as much as I want to get away, this heart will return to its place.

Until finally I don't know when I start sleeping.