College Or College Ah?

First Love?

For so long without writing, it feels foreign when these eyes have to face the screen for hours and turn crazy ideas of genuineness and anxiety into a paragraph after paragraph.

I was afraid to write back, considering how long I had stopped. But looking back on the length of the steps I have taken so far makes me regret my decision and think about it again.

Have I gone crazy? How can I stop at the opium that always makes me feel like a winner. Yes, winner. After I wrote something and I read it back it felt like I was winning. Winning against my ego. The ego always asks me to stop.

This time, Raina and Andreas again made me fall in love. Look into my past stories again and write them down for you my loyal readers.

Welcome back to this colorful story..

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Hanifa, Arika and Nunu have arrived at my house. Those who looked slightly changed due to his contained body looked very adorable.

"Sweepy" ledekku on Nunu.

"Happy he is, and Gian has said what are you?" yell Arika.

"What the hell, it's because most mama's cooking" he asked.

Suddenly a call came into my house. I quickly picked it up.

"Hello" I said.

Someone on the other end of the phone replied, "Hello this is Raina?" the soft voice of a woman.

"Who is this?" my many.

I haven't heard the answer yet, it seems that the phone connection is cut off and the voice is gone.

"It's very clear" I grumbled.

The four of us who had not met for quite a while, were like twins who were difficult to separate. We sat down and crossed each other's legs while watching the latest Korean drama recommended by Nunu.

"Eh fa, what do you want to tell me? Said important?" my many.

Hanifa glanced sharply followed by the glances of Nunu and Arika who were simultaneously facing her.

Hanifa took a deep breath and was seen focusing her eyes on me.

"Yesterday, Dhika accidentally slipped into me. He said Iyas' first love had returned to Indonesia" he said slowly.

Like being struck by lightning, I sat straight down and approached Hanifa.

"Calm down first, listen until it's done" he explained.

Arika and Nunu reflexively held onto my hand. They looked at me with a glare like I felt my anxiety at that moment.

"I'm the same brother Dhika, whose first love Iyas brother? Why can you say that and they still have that bond.. Continue to answer Dhika that this girl is quite meaningful to Iyas, but Dhika's brother is sure that now the girl has no influence because there is already you" explained Hanifa again.

I was silent for a moment and confused. In my mind there are many questions. I finally told the three of them my thoughts.

"How can everything fit this way? Just wanted to tell me that this morning, Iyas Nerima a lot of calls from a girl named Ruri. What does Ruri mean Dhika's sister?" my clear.

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A few hours later....

"Jaudah do not think too much rain, mending you ask directly the same brother Iyas. Let it clear" said Nunu.

"Yes, Malem will meet, right? By the way directly. If the girls dare to macem-macem later we intervene helpin" said Hanifa from his car.

"Judah shall we go home? Just kabarin anyway" said Arika.

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It was late and Randy asked me to look after the stall while he was about to take an afternoon shower.

"Teh, I'm going to go outside?" his yell.

"How come you haven't come home yet? Time alone?" sahutku.

"Yes out ajalah, take brother Iyas if the house is the key" he replied.

Shortly thereafter, I tried calling Mr. Iyas. He was always in a busy network.

Until I was annoyed and finally forced to call his office number.

"Lis, Brother Iyas is at the outlet, right?" my many.

"There was no, the exit permit said there was business" replied Listiana.

"When did it go?" my many.

"A long time ago, here just a moment to go again" he replied.

Hearing Lis explanation, it made me riled up and not feel good. Brother Iyas was clearly saying goodbye to going to the outlet and did not tell anything about his other plans.

To my knowledge, he always said that even if only to meet brother Dhika at their subscription coffeshop.

Then, what business is he now doing so he did not have time to contact me.

Ten minutes passed, my phone rang and Iyas tried to call me. Without thinking I refused his first call.

"Huu let him know the taste" I grumbled.

His second call came, and I still did not sincerely pick him up. I just refuse again.

Just on the third call, I picked up the phone.

"Why did you reject that?" tanyakanya.

"Why are you so busy?" my reply.

"Let's pick up the phone from the order" he replied.

"Tumben who orders not directly to the outlet? Usually I talk directly" I said.

He was silent and did not answer my last question. A few seconds later, only silence was heard.

"Do you want to be honest with me or do I have to find out first?" I said in a flat tone.

He knows what my question means, I'm sure. That's why he chose to shut up. Maybe he knew that I was kind of a sensitive and sensitive woman.

"Judah I close if I don't want to talk" I said as I finished the call.

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An hour later, he didn't call me back and even sent me a message.

Randy leaves the house to gather with his friends.

"Teh, don't you go out of the house? Iyas' sister will be here, right?" ask Randy.

"Udah ah don't need it brother Iyas, if he wants also he came here" I replied.

"Maybe again tea?" ledek Randy laughing.

When I was alone at home, there was a lot of anxiety and darkness in my mind. I feel like something is starting to change now. My growing life and my fear of losing someone who has been in my heart for a long time.

Especially after I saw a quote this afternoon..

"First love is hard to forget"...

The more wild it feels like fear sneaking quietly through the cavities of my heart. What if everything I'm afraid of happens.

What if I was just a stairway between Brother Iyas and his past?

What if I was the victim?

What if my first love fails?

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The sound of a car horn that is familiar can be heard in front of the gate of my house. I can assure you it's the sound of Iyas' car.

I looked on the sidelines of the front curtain, it turned out that his car was parked in the yard of the house.

I walked out to open the door.

The way he walked towards me, not as confident as usual. He looked down and held back the sense of who knows what.

"I want to clear up" he said, pinching my nose.

"Sit down" I answered.