Special Journey

Chapter 1

ALLAHUAKBAR...

ALLAHUAKBAR...

Sayup - Sayup I heard the voice of the azan who had just mumbled melodious, I eagerly opened my eyes hoping that today God gives happiness and spaciousness of the chest, with enthusiasm I open my eyes hope that today God gives happiness and spaciousness, I stared at the figure of the man whose face was almost perfect in my eyes.

"Wake up at dawn, don't you pray first?"

I shake - shake the body of a man who has been my husband for 6 years.

"Just sleep with me, later." Haikal sank his body under his thick blanket.

"Mas come on... How long do you want to be like this? Are you not afraid to always leave prayers?" I'm still trying to persuade him, "When do you want to guide me and Kia to prayer, so our prayer priest?"

I was still faithfully waiting for my husband to wake up, but he was without the slightest response. Finally I gave up, I began to leave my seat to the small mosque inside my house. Yes, in my house is special I built a mushola, right it might be a small room for me and his family to pray and worship other.

After my prayers I run my morning routine, cook for breakfast, sometimes wash or if my work schedule is morning, I will be ready for service, and that means I leave my laundry, and that means I leave my laundry, although it will be piling up but it doesn't matter, it's better than I have to be late to my workplace.

It just so happened that today I was on night service, so I could relax a little bit on homework, I was working in one of the private hospitals in my city.

Finished my morning routine, I went back to my room and I still saw my husband sleeping very soundly, almost every day for these few months, this sight that I always see. He is always busy with his world, he will not hesitate to sleep until noon, breakfast was not infrequently he missed, even forgot to work. Sometimes I want to give up but it was a choice. He is the man I chose to be my life partner.

I finished cooking back to my room.

"You still don't want to find a job?" I sat on the edge of the bed and I tried to speak well to him, although I saw his eyes were still closed but I wished he could hear my words.

"Yes..." Call me a little harder

"Mas... I'm helping you find a job y mas?" persuade me expectantly.

After a long time of unresponsive talk, finally my hope was granted, he opened his eyes.

"What work? What do you want me to do? I still have no intention of working with anyone else, I'm still thinking about what I should do again."

"Yes but mas, To open a business we need capital again, where do we get the money again mas? before you have money what is wrong you try to find work first, what work does not matter, if you want, which is important mas, then slowly we save and make another business, then slowly we save, my salary will not be enough for the cost of our necessities of life mas, Kia soon have to go to school, try to think carefully." My nadam started to rise, I started to get upset, it's been almost a year that my husband has no income, all this time we had a business but because now per economy the country is no longer stable because of this covid outbreak he decided to close our business temporarily.

During his efforts at the close he began to be lazy and severe again very lazy, every day just hanging out playing with his friends even not infrequently he slept outside the house, no matter where or with whom.

"I'm a number, don't like people's cooperation! Kia problem you don't have to worry, I'll take responsibility... Morning broke my mood." He changed his sleeping position.

"But for our daily living expenses are very mediocre, I can not continue like this, how can we save for Kia school?" I tried to make her understand, even though I knew this was a little impossible.

"Yes, I'll try to find him" he drowned his head in the depths of his pillow.

THANK GOD, I am grateful in my heart, I hope this is really the beginning of her change, I smile looking at her whose face I can no longer see.

"You want breakfast first? I've made fried rice for you." I still smile, I try to smile as sweetly as possible to really melt her heart.

"Let's have my own breakfast, I'm still sleepy." Hearing her answer my body went limp, I threw out my breath very heavily

HUHH...

"Patience... One day he must have changed." My inner. My heart tries to comfort the other heart.

I left him, and played with my only daughter.

"Syakia Aisyah" she is my daughter who is usually called Kia or Kak Kia, she is called a sister because she has 3 cousins (son of my brother-in-law, she is called a sister because she has 3 cousins, or my husband's brother).

" dear what else to play?" I approached Kia with a very beautiful smile, I hid all my worries and my grief, she was the comfort in my every sorrow.

"Main houses, Mom, try to see this is very beautiful, tomorrow you buy a sister who can cook her, Mom? Which I think is gini." Answer her enthusiastically while pointing at one of the pictures on the cover of her former toy.

"Kia kak kia nak kia is already a lot, kak kia is also already big and already want to school, so can't buy a lot of toys,oke." My hand forms the letter O in front of Kia.

"Well ma'am, but later if the toy is broken then can ya ma'am?"

"Yes, but Kia Kak must take care and take care of his toys well so as not to be quickly damaged y dear "My answer, while I hold and I wipe his head.

He replied to me with a nod of understanding, I always taught him to be responsible with his own or with the property of others he borrowed, even if I knew I wasn't a good mother, far from being good and perfect, I wanted to teach my son good things and instill a humble and sharing nature in him.

"Wouldn't you like breakfast with Mom? I cooked fried rice to my sister's sukaan."

"Later on, Mom, Kia still wants to play." He answered, glancing at me.

"Main can it later brother, later if it hurts how? Later if sick Kak Kia can not play again you know! want to be injected again with Aunt Yuli?"When it comes to eating, I spend a million ways persuading him, from seduction to things that can make him afraid.

"OK it! But eat it a little bit, Mom." It was still the same as ordinary days, always haggling.

"okay... The important thing is Kak Kia eat first yes, let's hurry up, will want to school!" I led him to stand up. After a long drama we headed to the dining room, just the two of us.

I am so grateful that Kia grew up to be a very smart and critical child, at the age of her who has entered 5 years, she always asks a lot of things, she is too chatty for children her age.

But according to some Kia people are a little different from her friends, from the age of 3 years, she began to like to talk alone, imagining with her children's world, and her children, he even once cried with fear and said he saw a giant figure in our house.

I began to think this was not normal, but as time went on He was getting used to what he saw. He was never afraid again. My conclusion to date is that he does have the advantage of being able to see things that most people cannot see.

Ohh yes, this is also the strange habit of Kia, I used to teach her to call me Ummi/Ummu. I think it's an Islamic call, so when this call doesn't match my character, I'm ashamed of it. But Kia changed all my imagination once according to her will. She started calling me Mama, Mommy, Mommy Mother... And it ends with Mom.

Doesn't matter! Whatever it is that won't change anything between me and her, she's still my very special daughter.

"Hallo. ohh okay." I heard my husband talking on the phone in a heavy voice, the typical sound of people waking up.

"Wake up?" My broom! While feeding the deep fried rice Kia's mouth, shortly after seeing her come out of the room.

"Hmmm...." Short answer from him.

"Why did you wake up?" Ask Kia! Who squinted his eyes after seeing Abinya walking past us.

"Yes... Abi take a shower first." He also went to the bathroom.

Before long He had finished his bath and was well dressed, then ate and after that played with us! To be honest he did not care completely, because he still often accompanied Kia to play.

"Where are you going to be neat right? Who called earlier?" I saw him in a shirt and black jeans.

"Nobody, just friends." The answer was short, without looking at me.

Ahir-ahir this he did change a little, he began to be indifferent and did not care, he also began to get used to receiving calls secretly.

I stared at him a little in disbelief.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Like he knew what I was thinking, "You don't have to be suspicious, it's just my friend, he wants to take me to work today." It was as if he had answered my suspicions.

"Alhamdulillah Mas, I pray that your efforts are not in vain, you are patient, straighten your intentions, God willing will produce good results." I smile with gratitude, hopefully this time he does not destroy my hope and trust.

"You don't have to talk, don't expect too much." Nothing yet He disappointed me.

"Mas... You why? Ahir-ahir this you are getting changed, you become more angry, snapped, I am wrong with you? I'm sorry if I made you angry and disappointed." I'm trying to figure out what really happened.

"Hm." He breathed out heavily and deeply.

"Buck...." Call me with a voice that begins to tremble and my eyes begin to glaze.

"Can't you not be whiny? It could be just crying, just saying, I'd rather you were silent not to talk much, I'm getting dizzy hearing you say." He slammed Kia's toy pen.

"You don't have to yell at me! you can say all my mistakes well." I answered her words in disappointment.

"Why are you angry?" Kia looked questioningly at her Abi.

I'm speechless! Maybe for her the words were ordinary, but somehow there was pain in my left chest. It was as if our expectations were inversely proportional, like it was just me hoping for too much on him, as hard as I could bear so that my true details would not spill.

I chose to leave him with Kia in the living room, Aki returned to the room with a whip. Disappointed? Obviously yes, I was disappointed again, I couldn't hold back my tears anymore.

"Patience... Istighfars." I stroked my chest repeatedly, trying to make a slight gap in my chest cavity that felt very narrow to breathe.

"Keep me up, O God, I'm strong."

I must not give up until here, I must not give up hope for the good of God. Sometimes I often think of going home to my parents just to calm my heart and mind, almost every time I miss my Mother very much.

I want to feel like I'm telling her all my problems, but I know this isn't the best way. I don't want to let them down, I don't want to trouble them anymore! But I decided to call my mother whom I used to call my mother. Just hearing his voice alone has given me a lot of strength to go through all this trouble.

Tuuuttt... Voice connected from my phone.

"Assalamualaikum Mommy, Mommy healthy?" I was so happy when my phone was connected. I tried to neutralize the sound of my former cry.

"Vaalaikumussalam... Healthy son thank God, brother healthy? Why not vidio call, tumben just a regular phone, you have a problem? Crying out? Afraid to see your eyes still red from crying!" Ask the mother who is always right to guess my situation.

"Mother... One-on-one donk ask her!" My protest.

"Hehe." Mother just laughed at my complaint.

"okay... Now try to tell me what's going on?" Ask her in a serious tone.

"Father Bun, here the signal is ugly, I'm at my mom's house." Reply origin.

'sorry mother I have to lie 'my inner yes it is the instinct of a mother, without telling a story sometimes believe not believe, the feelings of mother can not be lied to.

30 Minutes after we had chatted on this smartphone, I ended the call and returned to my worried and disappointed feelings.

I didn't feel like I was falling asleep so fast that I didn't know when Kia was sleeping next to me. I woke up, at 14:20 Wib.

I hurried to get up, wudu and headed for the small mosque to pray. And I never denied, I always wanted to know where and what my husband was doing, after going around the house I did not find him.

"Ah may she be gone, may her efforts not be in vain." I'm monologuing.

Ohh yes my name is “KHOIRATUL' AFIFAH" and usually I called Afifah with almost everyone who knows me, now I am 28 years old, not young anymore right? my profession is a skilled nurse at a private hospital in my town, right in my husband's town.