Not Him
48
Kyuhyun silently looked at the figure before him. Handsome face, tall sturdy body, white skin―oh, how almost perfect he is. Kyuhyun smiled wryly, that figure was a reflection of his shadow. No one ever knew that in him he suffered so much, without the slightest happiness that was implied from the radiance of his eyes.
Choi Hyunjin's. Choi Hyunjin's. Choi Hyunjin―'s
Kyuhyun continued to mutter the name, not even trying for a second to cast the shadow of the girl from his head. What is he doing now? Are you laughing happily? Or just as bad as it looks?
He could go crazy. That girl stole everything, and now just runs away? While Kyuhyun was completely dependent on him, he broke all of Kyuhyun's hopes. It's irresponsible!
Kyuhyun was too preoccupied with his own thoughts, letting the black tuxedo suit that was waiting for him to put on just like that on his bed. Soon Cho and Jung's family will meet, sit around unimportantly while discussing about their children's future plans―which will certainly culminate with marriage. Kyuhyun is young, only 23 years old, but he is not stupid to understand the sacred meaning of marriage. He is not ready with this―not if his life companion is just a person who will be a shield for his family's good name. He knew how hard his mother's life used to be, who married in the name of an arranged marriage.
“Hyung, are you getting ready?”
The voice made Kyuhyun turn back, taking his eyes off the large mirror he had been looking at all the time.
“Not yet, any minute.”
“Abonim awaits you. Jung's family has also arrived.”
“Alright, in a minute.” Kyuhyun smiled faintly, but Jino could see there was bitterness there. Fake smile!
Jino walked over. Without saying much he sat on the edge of the bed, looking at Kyuhyun who was busying himself wearing his tuxedo.
“Have you thought carefully about your decision, hyung?”
“Uhm.”
“Yakin, you won't regret it later?”
“Maybe.”
“How about Hyunjin?”
“He kicked me out of his life. He said this is the best way for us.” Kyuhyun was busy wearing his tie. Remembering that, like sowing salt on the incision wound in his heart― makes it even more painful.
Jino flinched, feeling shocked at that answer. He knew the two fools loved each other, much bigger than they showed. But how could this happen? He was completely clueless with the thoughts of the two of them. Both love each other, but prefer to torture themselves with choices that can ensnare them in the abyss of pain. Best road, eh?
“Hyung, it's a wedding. Not something you can play around with. You could have pretended to accept it. But don't you think about Yeoram's feelings? He loves you, and you're gonna give him a compulsion in your marriage?”
“Hyung, he's a fool. He was too blind to distinguish between love and obsession.”
Kyuhyun laughed, scoffing at Jino's words. “You are too stupid. Blind to love, huh? Didn't you love her? Then why are you silent when your stepbrother is soon to marry him?”
“Hyung―” Jino's breath choked. What nonsense did Kyuhyun just say?
“Do not act stupid! I'm not as innocent as it is not to be aware of your feelings for her.”
Jino was silent, not daring to deny. Is it that clear that he shows his feelings? Or because Kyuhyun has the ability to penetrate into his heart? Kyuhyun managed to open his stepbrother's death card. The years they grew up together, it was certainly not difficult for Kyuhyun to guess Jino's feelings for the girl. Feelings like―or maybe love―which has grown since long ago. Jino never revealed it, but Kyuhyun knew it.
Jino let out a heavy sigh, if it was like this she had no strength to dodge it anymore. He decided to let Kyuhyun know. Let fate solve everything. Only time can answer all these abstract things.
“All decisions are in your hands. You have the right to determine.” with eyes that are too difficult to understand, Jino looked at Kyuhyun, then stepped out of the room.
Kyuhyun thought again of Jino's words. Jino was right, all the decisions were in his hands. This is his life, he will live it later. So, he is the only person who has the right to be a determinant of his own life.
___
Ball room at the Cho family residence in the most luxurious decor possible. Just a small meeting of two families, but it really looks very classy. The heavy rain that poured out there did not dampen their happiness. All seemed to dissolve in excitement, welcoming the wedding plans of their two sons―Kyuhyun and Yeoram. It has been decided that they will get married soon.
Kyuhyun stood by the window, looking out blankly. Raindrops flowed on the glass surface, making his vision access to the outside of the house a little blurry. The namja breathed slowly.
Destiny―
Perhaps only fate is to blame for all that is happening to him now. Destiny is responsible for her increasingly uncertain life. Twice he felt his life was meaningful, and twice fate took it all away. In just a blink of an eye everything instantly disappeared―lewap imprudent.
“We're getting married, Oppa. Do you believe that? After so long ―finally.”
Kyuhyun was so surprised when suddenly someone pulled his arm, hugging him tightly.
Kyuhyun did not respond, did not say or refuse―ia was silent as if the girl was talking to a statue. But Yeoram didn't mind, Kyuhyun's attitude was like that since their reunion after a few years. His attitude changed, he became cold and did not care about the girl much anymore, unlike the old―Kyuhyun very fond of Yeoram like his sister. But then again, Yeoram doesn't mind. He will not demand anything. The most important thing is that Kyuhyun will soon be hers, only hers, forever.
Without saying anything, Kyuhyun took off the hand of Yeoram who was holding him. He walked away, away. Yeoram was shocked, but she could do nothing to prevent Kyuhyun. He let Kyuhyun go, leaving him in the room. Everyone was too washed away with their own happiness, not realizing the groom-to-be had left the place.
