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Eighty Seven's

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...*******...

Too soon when someone pulls my elbow next to mine and I'm slammed into his arms. What I realized then was the smell of his body, the fragrance of his perfume that had not changed and I had memorized it completely out of my head.

My crying broke again. Even now I'm late in getting all the tightness out of my chest because I know this is the most comfortable place I need. The warm embrace and the soft caress, I really like it both in the past and in this moment.

I'mtired. All my life stories feel like a sad dream. It was an endless nightmare. There is only suffering, pain, and suffering. So, Lord please .. stop the time for now only. Let me feel this comfort sebentaaar. Because when I let go, I knew that everything was temporary. Just a simple convenience.

When I mollified my cries and left in a puddle, I who was about to pull away from the warm embrace was instead pulled back to continue in a position like that. However, I realized that this was not the right place and circumstances.

"Leas–"

"Shut up!" orders slowly.

From the tone of her voice I knew that she was calming me down, or giving me strength to lean back as I needed.

"Don't do this, Mom," I'm still trying to get away again. But he kept holding me strong even though he let me out of his arms.

Wiped and caressed my cheek that still has traces of tears. He stared at me with a squeak on his forehead. "Dear,"

"I'm fine, Mom."

"I don't see it that way."

"Seriously. I'm still fine. Just now it's just–" what would be my proper reason for him to believe. "It's just a reaction to a malicious comment. So it's only natural that–"

"Who dares to make malicious comments in front of you?" ask Reiki coldly.

I clearly understood that his facial expression like this was out of anger. Or rather, holding back anger.

Then I just shook my head in response. "No. That's not it." I'll never provoke this man in front of me. All he can do when his anger is uncontrollable. And I really didn't expect that to happen.

"Tell me, Azzura,"

It did not stop my arm insisting that he not continue this discussion. I mispronounced.

"I'm tired, Mas. I don't think I'm feeling well."

Indeed, it feels like my last night headache is relapsing again. Coupled with the coldness that hit my skin made me even more tormented with a position like this. I want to fall. I want to sleep so that the dizziness in my head subsides.

Reiki held my forehead, cheek, and gently stroked my entire face. "You're feverish. From the beginning I felt it. All right, we're going home now."

He pulled my hand gently and led me out of the toilet. Like I thought that the other employees who saw us immediately became interested and started whispering.

"But Mr. Damar–"

I mean, I want permission to go home properly, so that Om Damar will know that I understand his words well. I'm not being disrespectful or making her even more embarrassed.

"Let me take care of it later."

I've guessed.

"Bag me–"

As always, Reiki is in all his control that even I don't understand how great it is.

...- - -...

I don't know how long I lost consciousness and when I opened my eyes again the ivory white color seemed to dominate the room I found now.

This where is it?

A room room looks so big and luxurious, clean, and fragrant soothing makes me comfortable at once. Then my memory switched when I was still opening my eyes. And Reiki is the answer to why I'm here.

Ah yes ... This is Reiki's apartment room. The room I had occupied and was very familiar with my life a while ago. There were some parts that seemed to change from before until I barely recognized this room. For example, with nightstand, sleeping lights, wall colors that are not only white, but there is a touch of silver in some places.

No wonder I ended up here. Unfortunately I have not been able to resist all this, due to my body's condition that feels weak and a little fever at this time.

I looked up when the door opened. The owner of the room had just entered with a tray next to his hand. He walked slowly towards me, without letting go of the slightest glare from my eyes. I who was too sad was able to hide the blushing effect of the deadly gaze of a Maheswara Reiki.

"You should eat, honey. After that you have to take medicine."

He put the tray on the nightstand. A bowl of food was taken and she prepared to feed me. I'm certain.

"I feed you porridge, yeah,"

I who did not have the slightest desire to eat now only shook my head weakly.

"Azzura baby, you have to eat" he said with a little emphasis. "I don't want you to get any worse than this."

My eyes turned to look at the window on my right side. My mind was already completely fragile and desperate for everything that was happening in my life. So let it be, let it be if my condition worsens. Let's die all of you!

What do I have to what? Nothing I deserve even if I want it. It's not all mine. It's not all for me. I only have me in this world.

A touch on my lips suddenly surprised me and turned to find that Reiki had just kissed him. Yeah, he kissed me without excuse, as usual.

"Eat first, honey. Please ... don't let me 'eat you', '" he said with a thin smile. Yep, the charm of Reiki is in his thin smile that makes me often so blushed.

"I don't want to eat, Mom."

"No. You must eat, honey. Or I'll be mad."

Is he worried about me? Is anyone still worried about me? Is anyone still saving me from this pit of pain?

The thought made my tears just melt away. I immediately erased it before it turned even more swift.

"Sshh," she caressed my cheek. "Don't be sad," then he kissed my forehead. "Everything will be fine, honey. I love you so bad."

His words even made me sob and made him hold me again like in the toilet earlier. Back he gave me that comfort, with without me thinking about his sweet words just now. Seriously, I was more comfortable and secure in her arms than remembering that she just said love to me was like that.

The comfort I found with Reiki was not the same as what I found with Kenneth. Right, I realize that now. Maybe I'm comfortable with Ken, but I worry even more about him. Because I'm afraid that if Ken has broken down, getting bad things is due to his closeness to me. There are also many other concerns I would have if Kenneth was with me.

It's different when I'm with Reiki. I'm comfortable with him, but I don't have any worries anymore. Because I know how great Reiki is with herself. Not that Ken's not great. That's not. More to Reiki I can make a mainstay, a backrest, without worrying about him getting hurt because of me. Because men like Reiki can't get hurt so easily. And because Reiki was able to convince me that he wouldn't be easy to take down even if the world fought him.

It was clearly different from Kenneth who had a reputation, a career and a big name, and most importantly his dream as a superstar. Yeah, I'm worried that my existence would destroy everything that a Kenneth Barata has. Now it is clear that I am able to discern what feelings are and who is in my heart. But unfortunately, whoever it is, nothing is destined for me.

...***...