Like Drama's

Fourty

I stared blankly at the new papa's navel. There are no strange tears. I don't want to cry. Like something stuck up to hold my tears somewhere. I just stared and watched all the process until papa was buried that day.

I still hear my mother beside me. In fact, the mother had fainted twice when the body of the father was forgiven and when the papa had started to enter the burrow.

My finger was twisting the petals of the flower sown on the mound of earth, staring blankly without a sound. Yeah, I wasn't even thinking about it. I was just repeating every sentence you said before you breathed your last breath.

That short?

It's that short. I was angry and grateful because I still had time to talk with papa even if only for a few moments.

I also had time to wrath to mama who had been hiding papa's disease from me. Why are they that hard? I also deserve to know everything. And most importantly, I want to spend a lot of time with you. Whatever the circumstances.

But now ... everything has happened. All that remains are memories. I counted, not even more than an hour when I finally spoke to papa before papa closed his eyes. Forever.

Dear papa.

I'm losing half my soul now. The knight in my life is gone forever. And never come back. His departure seemed to bring some of my soul with him.

I'm slumped. Very bad with the departure of papa. I fell hard in the face of the fact that I almost never got to meet papa one last time.

But there is still a speck to my sanity in the midst of this slump. Namely, mama. There is one more life that I must take care of all my soul. The only thing I have and I love him. I have to be much stronger than my mom. Because my mother is now my only treasure.

...🔷🔷🔷...

Heavy days after the departure of my beloved father managed to pass both of me with my mother. The fact of being able to rise from the slump is not an easy thing to do. There are stages in every moment. Someone must play a role standing when others are falling. That's how it was between me and my mom in our mourning. We strengthen each other, look after each other, and give each other hope.

We are still in Japan now. Apparently a month passed since mom opened a cake shop business in Yokohama with her friend who is a native there. His mind switch is busy with his best friend in the store.

While me?

I was part-time at a small restaurant not far from the cake shop. Not so fast we need money, not. Papa left us a lot of savings that could finance my life and mama for the next year. But both me and my mom, both need busyness to switch our minds and hold our longing for the figure of papa. A person who no longer exists in this world.

Another week my graduation will be held. And the day after tomorrow I will fly to Jakarta with my mom. Yeah, just the two of us. Without papa. I had imagined I would cry because I thought of my dad who never got into my graduation photo, my happy day. If I had a little more kindness, then I would have gotten a full family photo on the most beautiful day of my life.

"Azzura, there's a number for you" Ami whispered to me. So besides me, there is also Ami, an Indonesian girl who works at this restaurant. He speaks fluent Japanese, so his help made it easier for me who was completely blind to Japanese. Because he always bridges between me and the restaurant owner, also between me and other employees, even with visitors. Although I almost never interact at length with visitors who come.

"Who?" reply whiskey. We were busy actually, so we just stole time to chat outside of work.

"Visitors at table eight. Japanese guy, dude."

I've experienced something like that a few times. Either through Ami or openly male creatures often try to get to know me. Almost the average citizen there is a native, aka a Japanese guy. But sometimes there are also Caucasians who are tourists there with the symbol asking me to make acquaintances.

There's nothing I'm responding to at all. Besides because I have not been interested, well .. maybe I still have not forgotten the figure of him. But I will always try to bury him deeply in the corner of my heart.

Only, I will always be friendly to anyone who invites me to get acquainted. Underline, I only understand when they speak English. If they can not speak English, then surely Ami they will approach first.

Basic men!

"Hi, my name is Ryu." the visitor guy sitting at table number eight reached out his hand after I placed his order.

I smiled kindly, as usual. Then I returned his hand. "Azzura."

"that's a pretty name."

"thank you."

"can I have your number?"

To the point once.

"Maybe next time." I resigned politely. No need to respond or get angry at the temptations of flirtatious visitors, just face with a smile, because that is the essence of the service of this restaurant. Of course I still want to continue working here after graduation.

Yes, I've decided to live with my mother in this man's country.

"Makep know, Zura," greeted Ami in the kitchen.

"All your guys say cute, Mi." Anybody asks me like that, then Ami will always comment that guy.

Ami chuckles. "Yes, in fact, they are cute. Not one man's gonna lose, Ra. My experience is dating a Japanese guy. I want to be able to get narrow-cipit but the nyantol even local Indonesia Raya again. Hhhhh,"

"What matters is good, Mi."

"Yes, anyway,"

"Udah ah, get on with the job!"

...***...