Like Drama's

My world

My soul is waiting

Remembering everything that passed

When you were on the side

Keep me in the warmth of your love

Slowly the time changes

Put my barrel here

Try to forget your shadow

Who always forces you to miss you

I tried for a long time

Putting myself in the dimness of my heart

Tired of holding back the pain I felt

Even though I know I still want you

Look at me here

Against the bitterness of my own destiny

Without you

I am weak and insignificant

 

...----------------...

A year ago

Plaque.

It still feels unsatisfied my slap on Montana's cheek. The guy looks like he hates me. Wh why? Why does he hate me? Where is the love he has for me? Already stepped?

Today, I slapped the groom. Even if I go viral, I don't care. Although the whole of Indonesia recognized my face, the bodo period. I'll never care. All I know is that the man in front of me now, the groom, has been my girlfriend for four years. She got married while she was still my girlfriend. Untold, unannounced break up, even without the sweet invitation she got married behind my back.

I thought, with my arrival at her wedding, she'd be shocked and guilty. But what did I get? He looked at me with hate. It was as if he was not making a mistake with me.

Why, Mota? Wh why?

Why take care of me?

I'm the stupid one, I'm the innocent one. In my eyes for four years it was just you. Even idol artists don't pull in my eyes. Because you're my world, Mota! You're everything to me.

...***...

It has been a year since that sad day. Until now I did not know what was the reason Montana left me to marry another girl. Because of age? Ah ... Our age is only five years adrift.

Thenwhat? What's the reason you betrayed me? For a year I suffered from heartache and tried to forget the man.

But no matter what, I half-dead still crave it. I want Montana back to me even if it's impossible. He's already married. Already have his soul mate. I still lament my broken heart.

Until I finally get it. I've forgotten about it. I moved on with pride. And that's why I don't want to fall back in love for now. Because I'm still mourning. I'm still a little traumatized to start a relationship again. More than that, I was afraid to be betrayed again.

Then now why is she present again after the painstaking I hate her?

"Lo squirm Monta –ups– monkey?" alya's eyes widened sharply. It was as if he was ready to pounce when he found Montana nearby.

Since a year ago, the name Montana was haram called by the mouths of the three of us. So in exchange for that name is Monkey. A very fitting name and suitable for the traitor.

"He saw you, didn't he?" ask Radit.

I'm shaking. "Gue was surprised, why is he in Jakarta?"

"Udah hell, Ra! Don't think about that creature. Move on! Think of it as Kiki" said Alya.

"Did!"

"Cock-full?"

"Gue really doesn't want to take any chances, Al. We can all see how cute a man is, his charm, and everything in Reiki is very attractive in the eyes of women. I realize that. I lied if I wasn't interested. I'm still normal,"

"But?"

"But .. I don't want to take any chances, I said. There's gonna be too much trouble, Al, if I take a step on a guy. I'm afraid of heartbreak. Broken heart with the Monkey, it feels like what. I don't know what my life would be like if I were heartbroken again."

"Yes, I understand, Ra. But don't be discouraged, don't dong."

"Gue wants to find a commoner's girlfriend, Al. Which we-we're like."

"Eh, the Monkey is the director, right?!" sela Radit's.

"Why?" ask Alya.

"That means he's not a commoner like us."

"Seriously, Ra? How come you never said that?" alya's concubine. "And you just mentioned her name?"

I smiled, remembering the past. "Yes that .. but Mota promised me that she would keep convincing her about me." My mind floated again. "Before, he always said he'd survive whoever got in the way. If it's just his blessing, Mota says it's no big deal. Our plan is still long. But in the end, what do I get?"

Alya rubbed the back of my hand. Radit rubbed my head. "Perhaps because he disagreed so he left me .." I said again with a sore.

No, I'm not gonna cry anymore. For me, Montana is the past. Because I'll never ruin people's households.

"Gue has really moved on, so I can say his name again." I smiled a little. "By the way, you both know not, among the Maheswara family there are those who do not like me. That's why I wouldn't dare to start anything with him. I would never start anything with Reiki. Okay, okay, Al?"

"Yes, dear Raju. I-i understand. We'll find a commoner's girlfriend later. Who says that the guy is easy. From now on my mindset has to change."

.

.

Today after two hours on campus, I stopped by a place with my friends. The place we call the base camp is a halfway house for street children who have no family. A friend of mine on campus, but another faculty, named Dimas who initiated the establishment of the halfway house. At the cost of 90% of the inheritance he got from his grandfather he used to help street children. For those of us who want to volunteer to help and get involved, whatever the form, Dimas will be very grateful.

Many activities are done Dimas et al in 'care for' the halfway house. Including by providing education to street children who have dropped out of school. I with Alya and Radit joined in teaching reading and writing lessons on certain days. Because of the many interests of friends who want to take part in the activities of the halfway house, then I with Alya and Radit and some other children get rations two days a week to teach.

"Look, Al .. This is our world," I said as I stared at the children with sadness. We are able to share even though we are not rich donors.

"Yes, Ra. Lo bener ..."

"Where could the tyrant accept me with our 'big family', right?!"

"Are we cousins to Kate Middleton, right?"

I'm turning. "Huh? Same relationship with Kate?"

"Let him support our activities."

"Why go all the way to Kate anyway, Al?"

"Yes yes. Suddenly I'm jealous of Kate and Megan."

Haduh, this is Alya's brain again why?

...----------------...

I was sitting next to a boy who was drawing him on a wooden table that we had. I gave him to put the colors on the scene he was making. It was simple, just a view of the trees and a highway. Just like the place that the boy and his friends used to go through.

I have to be thankful for my life. My life, which is only as a commoner with needs that can be met by mama papa, is more than enough. Just stay grateful and make her a blessing and happy.

The savings I have, often run to help this halfway house. But I'm happy. My parents encouraged me and my friends to do what I did.

Life is not about ourselves and our families, it is about sharing with them what we have.

You get what you do.

That's what I believe. If we are diligent in doing good, then good will also come back to us. Whatever the form, whoever gives it.

"Hey, Ra!" Dimas. He took a seat next to me.

We do not sit in chairs yes, we only use plastic mats and carpets for each of our teaching and learning activities.

"Hey, Dim!"

"Next week I'm going to Bromo. Come yuk!"

"In order?"

"Have a good time, Ra. We take a walk. Refreshing a little from the rush." Dimas smiled. Everyone knows Dimas is a hard worker. In addition to busy college, he works part time here and there.  Not to mention his social activities that are not small, including taking care of our halfway house.

"Yes tuh. You need a vacation, Dim," I agree.

"Come on, Ra! Take Alya too. Radit I bargained for eh he said think about it first. He's still part-time at the cafe too, right?!"

"Yes. Radit has to let his boss see his work schedule first."

"Trus if you?"

"I was thinking about it, too, Dim."

"Yaaahh .. Come on dong, Ra, come along once in a while."

"Yee ... find a girlfriend there, Dim! Let's not bet on the guy's girl." I tease.

"Do you have a boyfriend, Ra? Wh who? How do I not know?"

"I didn't say I had a boyfriend, Dim. I'm just saying, I'm a girl. I have Alya, Radit, Nanda, Shinta–"

"Huh! Kirain."

I chuckle.

"Are you my girlfriend?" dimas' words surprised me. "So my girl, huh, Zura?"

...****...