Just a Bond

Finally Arrived Also

“Mother fuck, anyway. Pick up Dad's phone. I'll talk to Mommy later.”

Letting Mother talk to Father, I tried to relax myself by taking a lot of breath while leaning back on the couch. Although I won't really calm down, let alone look at Mother's serious look.

“Oh, Mas Faridzi is still in Sumenep, Mas Ahmad. Possibly later tonight still home.”

About what Dad told Mother and asked the Father, huh?

I repeatedly ruffled my hair looking at Mother who was still busy talking to Dad.

“Oh, yes, Mas. Reza also told me that Najwa was in the clinic. Yes, Mas.” A smile on the lips of Mother

looks forced. “Iya, Mas. Sorry, yes. I'll tell Farhan later, Mas.” Mother looks to nod her head. “Good, Mas. Wa aleikumussalam.”

As soon as Mother dropped the phone from the ear, I immediately hurriedly averted my eyes, pretending to be busy myself.

“Not to be plain pretentious. Mommy knows you were sniffing from earlier.” I could only grimace softly hearing those words. When can I convene when dealing with Mother? It never will.

“When are you going to Najwa's house?” Well, right?

I froze. This is the question I least wanted to hear in that time. But what else? Everything must have been revealed, and I should have been prepared for this.

“Mother don't want to hear stories from me first?” His intention is to buy time again. Actually, I'm not ready.

“You better tell in front of everyone, so there is nothing you cover. And you must be quick

admit what you've done.” I will finally meet that time. Ah, could not, anyway, the time stopped spinning for a while. Uh, what the hell? There is an apocalypse when time stops turning. Dirghtruz, Farhan.

“Farhan, you are already a dazed person, huh? People say no. disahuti.”

I breathe heavily. I hold my head, look at Mommy for a long time. “Besok morning, Mommy.”

Again Mother glared. Wonder how I did. Mother is not tired of what, huh? Shouting, glaring, exerting emotion from earlier. This time he was ruffled waist while still staring intently at me. “Why are you waiting tomorrow morning? Don't you want your problems to be solved quickly? Or maybe this is what you wanted from the beginning? Want to avoid the mistakes you have made?”

I'm rattled. Want to shake her head, but Mother's questions contradict each other. What is, misunderstand again. “Bundaku

dear. Mommy says I have to admit my mistake in front of everyone, ‘kan? Where are you again? In Sumenep, ‘kan? Yes already. Father has not come yet. How's the story?”

Congratuations. This time I survived because my father had not returned.

“OK, tomorrow morning we go there. Watch out if you make it.”

Okay. Relaxed. There's still time to prepare for everyone tomorrow.

The woman then lowered her hands on her waist, tidied the bag on her shoulders, then stepped out of the room. After Mother died, I immediately lay on my stomach in bed. Today was really exhausting. I need a break.

***

Standing in front of this house again made me remember the memories that were created here. How the beginning of the heart that had been frozen— filled with hatred for Najwa— slowly melted. It was in this house that it all really started. Story after story presented by Najwa's parents and brothers, as well as the strange gurgle that I often accidentally caught from the woman that was thrilling, until she did something unexpected. However, not for a long time, the things that triggered Najwa's suffering in his own house also followed behind him.

But that guilt is now the reason why I'm standing here again. I will take responsibility for everything.

Please give me a chance to mend our relationship, Najwa.

“Farhan!” The clap was quite rough and the shout diverted me from the front yard view of my in-laws' house.

Yes, because I got a warning from Mother yesterday, I do not dare to stall for time. This is where we are now. He was silent, but I knew he was holding back anger. It was seen from the cold attitude that was displayed since picking me up home.

“You're even dumb. Let's call greetings, or what it is,” scold Mother.

I rolled my eyeballs. “Who is dumb, Mother? Mother, anyway, just want to call greetings only must I.”

One quite harsh dehaman sourced from the Father, makes me blink for a moment. Jesus, Farhan. It can still be as stubborn as your mother.

“Eh, you've arrived, Ridz.” I heard Dad's voice from the door. Father and Mother welcomed

greet Pa-Ayah kindly, while I suddenly became groggy. The pretty fixed look that Dad gave me was successful in making me die a flea.

“Kok Mas Ahmad kayak know that we will come here?” ask Mommy. Ah, yes, too, yes.

“Faridzi did tell you earlier if you want to come here.”

O, apparently.

“Dad,” my hand while reaching for his right hand to hold. The usually friendly man did not show any expression, other than accepting my hand. It's really stressful.

“Come in.”

I took a deep breath before finally stepping dumbly tailing Mother and Father towards the front room of the house, of course with a mind that is not careless. Upon arrival there, my parents were still busy talking to Dad, while I could only sit limply watching their interactions like a rascal on the streets. Every once in a while I secretly wander, looking for Najwa's whereabouts. I wanted to ask, but my throat was stuck.

“Oh, yes, Mas. Where's najwa?”

Pucuk diitita, ulam also arrived. Mother, what a savior, anyway.

“Najwa is in his room. Another break. But it's been told that her in-laws are coming.”

It feels this heart dysentile when the name of the husband is not spoken from the words of my father-in-law. What does he think I am? A supernatural being? I'm getting worried about all this. Dad's been showing subtle insinuations since. Yes, I realize very well that the treatment of my wife's beloved man is an indirect reproach.

“Pak, I want to look at Najwa first,” Mother said as she got up from her seat. Unable to stand the gripping atmosphere created in this four-by-three-meter room, I immediately got up to follow Mother. I also want to see Najwa. But— “Where are you going, Farhan?”

***

Hello there. Mas Farhan come back. Yuyao! Who is missing? Kuy comment. Soon she'll meet Najwa, lo.

Sumenep, Madura, East Java

Sunday, 10 October 2021