Just a Bond
Revealed 2
“You think I can hurt my already happy mother because you accepted our matchmaking offer? You think I'm what kind of man would want to snatch someone's wife huh?”
“Keep if you do not want to take Rifka from Rifki, why while at home, you are always with him? Do you realize that your speech and actions are inversely proportional?”
I wiped the rough tears on the cheeks. I stared hard at him who was still maintaining his fiery red look in front.
“You said I was a hypocrite, but you didn't realize you were worse than me. Indeed, yes, the fault of others as the tip of the nail is easily seen, while the fault of oneself which is even greater than the mountain, sinks so easily. You ever think about Rifki's feelings, anyway, Mas? Have you ever thought about whether it had crossed Rifki's brain about your closeness? Ever thought about how the future of Rizqun for example happened anything between Rifka and Rifki because of this problem?”
“You tid—”
“Great you, Mas. You can think about your mother's feelings, but instead ignore the feelings of others. How many people have you unknowingly hurt? How's my dad feeling, Mom? How did my mother who died long ago feel? Can you imagine that your mother is in the position of my parents? How do my two brothers feel, especially Mas Reza?”
Why is this painful reality?
“I don't know what to do now. You're guilty of me because I accepted your mother's offer. Your brain is still normal, isn't it, Mas? I agreed to our arranged marriage half a month before we got married. We've only been married for two months, and I know you haven't had three months. Where do my mistakes lie? Why am I guilty here? Rifka married Rifki was long ago. Long before any stupid matchmaking offers from your parents. You don't see Rizqun how old is it now?”
Let it. Don't be pretentious anymore with Mas Farhan. He's been completely outrageous. It's good to blame me, but I don't know anything. Who the hell do you think I am?
“The one Mother wants is you, not Rifka. That's what makes me and Rifka choose to withdraw with our relationship.”
“Connect?”
“Iya. Less clear what my words were? I liked Rifka from the beginning we knew, but she chose to accept Rifki's application because she knew my mother hoped for you.”
“Keep me wrong?” I held my head in pain. “As long as I know Ms. Rasti, I try to be friendly that is purely out of respect for her as a friend of Dad and as an older person. I didn't know that he wished I was his son-in-law.”
Dad, Mas Reza ....
“I'm wrong, Mom? If I had previously instigated your mother to match you with me only, not with Rifka, you deserve to blame me. But ... for a second I never had any thoughts of being your wife first, Mas.”
Some time passed with silence. I don't know what's on Mas Farhan's mind right now. I used that time as a means of relaxing myself by taking as many breaths as possible. My God, my body is still very weak due to food allergies, now even treated to things like this.
“What have you fought so far? You ever tell your parents that you like and want to marry Rifka? Rifka too, if she knew Miss Rasti was hoping for me, she should have tried to attract her attention and make her fall in love with her. Did it ever do the same Rifka? Hearing your reason earlier, it shows Rifka himself is wrong by directly concluding that Bu Rasti will not like it, even though he is not yet okay. Don't try, instead accept another man's proposal and now you're blaming me?”
“Funny! This world is so funny! Innocent people are made a scapegoat to the point that he does not know how to defend himself!”
Then you know what this man in front of me is doing? He clenched his lips together, like a flea that had been given mothballs. I am thankful that he opened his eyes and realized his mistake.
“You do not realize anyway, Mas? You're the dumbest, most selfish person I've ever known. At the time when what you want is not achieved, and instead betrothed to her brother Rifka, you just act like me. What do you think I am? The samsak?! So as soon as possible you treat as you like to vent anger? I know, it turns out this is the reason you hate me so much.”
This hand could not help but clap to see the extremely extraordinary work of this man. Even though at the same time, the tears came back. Amazingly, he was so great that he could destroy me without touching me physically.
“Congratulations, Mas. You have succeeded in breaking me to pieces, even by reason of a mistake I never made. I think the kindness you gave me during my time at Dad's house and the change in your attitude for the better is an indication that you want to improve our household. But it turns out I was wrong. That's your trick to make me hurt.”
I raised my head while taking a breath with my mouth because the tightness continues to squeeze the chest. Only after feeling better did I get back to speaking. “Stupidly I have put hope in you, Mas. Now I realize how naive I am to think that you really want to change. Because in reality you just want to make me more ruined again.”
So unreliable with this newly revealed reality, I don't even know what to react to now.
“But because you over-exalted the ego, again unknowingly you have prepared a toxic for your own parents, Mas. If only you were honest from the beginning, maybe Mommy would obviously be angry, but gradually she will accept. Then now? Can you imagine what would happen to your mother if she knew what was really going on between us?”
Really, I really didn't expect this to be the reason he hated me so much.
“And it seems, one thing I have to straighten out with you. You vented all your anger on me, but I knew nothing. You should ask your parents first, you also do not really become a man. If it is not me you want, why not be firm from the beginning?”
You know, I've already fallen in love with Mas Farhan, and now I have to be surprised by a love that shouldn't have happened. Ah, is that really so?
“What do you mean, Najwa?”
***
Hayo, comment kuy. Give advice to Najwa, no. He was confused he said. Wkwk. I'm so sorry to write this. 😢😢😢 Pity the Najwa.
Sumenep, Tuesday, September 14, 2021
