Just a Bond

Your attitude makes me Speechless

So long I waited for Mas Farhan's arrival, but still there was no sign of him coming. Even if she doesn't treat me well, my feelings of worry as a wife will always be there. Fear of something happening outside to her, fear that she is in trouble or whatever. Scroll wall clock, it already shows at 19:55. Recalling the prayer, I went into the room to pray first. Who knows, Mas Farhan will be home soon.

After the ritual of worship, I immediately changed clothes. When I was about to comb my hair and mirror, I was stunned when I saw a row of makeup tools that had no idea what their function was. All I know is powder and body lotion. Must be Miss Rasti who provided all of this.

I sit in the front seat of the mirror. I looked at a face that looked less luminous and thinner, certainly ugly. The face I saw in the mirror was like I wasn't. Kuyu; the black lines encircled both eyes, making them like panda eyes; and the glare made me like a corpse. How not? I was the heavy thinker type of before. There's a little problem, to think about. This is also what was mentioned by Mas Reza before the decision to marry I took. He who understands my character well, so he is very restless.

Although when our wedding was held he seemed mediocre, even impressed not to have any burden, my second brother was actually anxious. He pretended to be fine in front of the family. I found out when I accidentally saw Mas Reza sitting alone on the porch of the house. When I got there, she hugged me tightly, then cried. Yes, Mas Reza was crying for me who was going to be the wife of the man at that time.

I touched both cheeks, and looked at him in the mirror. My God, I've only been like this for a day.

While engrossed in my own world, the ringing of my phone interrupted. Immediately, I got up and grabbed the electronic item on the bedside nightstand. Who knows if there's any news from Mas Farhan. However, as soon as my hand stopped moving, I swiped the green icon there when I realized who the caller was. What will I answer to him? I left the phone screen on, with the ringtone of the call continuing to be heard and the same name still on it, because I was confused. However, the caller did not give up easily. He repeated the call to umpteenth time. I had to swipe the green icon on my phone and get the call.

"Najwa, you're okay, right? Why hasn't the phone been picked up?"

I took a deep breath and then exhaled slowly in shock at the point of question from my mother-in-law. I held the phone tightly to my ear.

"Sorry, Mother. Najwa didn't hear his cell phone ring."

O Allah, forgive the servant who lied to the Mother.

I heard a sigh of relief from Mother. What if you know the real situation, huh?

"Mother what's the phone at night? Tumben?" Hopefully, this round of mine can be transferred to another topic of conversation.

"It's okay, son. Mother just wants to know your situation. It's fine, isn't it?"

"Yes, Mother. Farhan Mas is good, Najwa is good." I bit my lower lip after saying that sentence. It seemed that there were thousands of needles that suddenly invaded the chest creating pain because the actual reality was inversely proportional to what I said.

"Yes, already. Mom gets there sometime, yeah. Mother sends greetings to Farhan. Happy resting. Mother doesn't want to interrupt both of you're nightly agendas."

I smiled faintly at Mother's statement. The night agenda, huh? An emotionally draining night agenda because of the son's annoying and cruel attitude is just his puppet.

"Ready, Mother."

I shed my body on the floor, rubbing my chest in relief as soon as Mother ended her call. The conversation with Mommy ended as if out of a stuffy room that was not oxygenated. Hence, I hurriedly inhaled a lot of breath. Fortunately he did not ask for the whereabouts of his son or told him to call him, could die lice me. Even to this day, he has not come home yet.

After relaxing enough, I returned to the initial activity, staring at the reflection in the mirror. Anyone would be bored and reluctant to look me in the face. It's so ugly. When I looked at this row of cosmetics on my front desk, out of nowhere, I who had never touched anything other than powder sprinkles, slowly wanted to polish my face with the tools.

Perhaps by changing the appearance, Mas Farhan could be more sympathetic and respectful with my presence. He said, a pleasant appearance when viewed can attract the attention of the husband. Apart from beautiful and not, because both are relative. I began to look at the cosmetic equipment and read the description for anything. Because of the general cosmetics, I only take three items that I understand how to use, namely powder in the form of cream and powder, and powder.

I started my actions to polish my face, by putting the cream on first and then coated the powder powder, and then I finally applied the wedge around the eyes. A sweet smile began to be imprinted on the lips when I saw the work tonight. Not too bad for people who are just learning to wear cosmetics. At least my face is not as scary as before.

My attenuation was shaken when I heard the door opened violently. I turned my head, it turned out that Mas Farhan was already standing there with a tired look. Quick, I wear an instant veil because I remembered the rules last night. After that, I went to welcome him.

"Mas, are you home? Where are you from? I'm worried."

He turned his head quickly towards me, making me again have no guts to return his gaze. I lowered my head. Heart beat faster than usual, between fear and nervousness. Yeah, I don't know why I was suddenly nervous when I realized that Mas Farhan had been staring at me for a long time. Is it because I wear cosmetics, huh?

"I told you, don't mind me!"

"But, Mas-"

"You don't understand what human language is, huh?" Instantly, there were tears that slid free from my petals as he snapped. So angry? I just wanted to pay attention to him. "For a long time I was fed up with your attitude that always meddled in my affairs. Move out of this room. I don't want one more room with you."

My body tiptoed in shock as he slammed the door quite roughly, then walked into the bathroom. My knee hinges seemed to break suddenly so that I could not concentrate. It bursts to the floor along with the flow of clear circles from the corner of the eye. I hate this cry, a cry that even makes me look weak in front of Mas Farhan. However, how do I stop, while the tightness in the chest jacks up the tears to keep flowing?

Immediately I wiped my tears and looked up, looking at Mas Farhan who had changed into casual clothes.

"Need another expulsion?"

Lazily serving his painful rant again, I immediately got up and left the room, then went into the next room. Directly throw the body onto the mattress with the stomach condition. Apply the cry behind the pillow I accidentally put on top of the head so that his voice does not sound out.

Because of crying for too long, drowsiness attacks. Slowly, I closed my eyes hoping tonight would sleep and not have nightmares like last night. However, it had only been a few minutes since I had closed my mouth and had not fully entered the dreamland, I was startled by a strange sound that sounded from the side of the house.

Don't tell me it's the sound of the housekeeper? Jesus, Najwa. What are you thinking? For your information, I'm quite a coward.

Trying to vent myself, I put away the pillow on my head, then got out of bed. I opened the half-body green window curtain to the south of the room. Suddenly, I quickly closed the curtains because the feeling of fear suddenly dominated. I just found out if the house that Mas Farhan occupied is adjacent to a cemetery that is quite spacious. At least six meters away from this house. I wouldn't be able to sleep tonight if I was alone.

Duh, did I just go to Mas Farhan's room, huh? Angry, isn't it? Definitely angry. That guy's gonna be bad temper. However, instead of not sleeping all night and being haunted by constant fear, I forced myself to step into Mas Farhan's room again.

Arriving there, it turns out that Mas Farhan was asleep by hugging the bolster. Slowly, I step out of my legs, then go up to the bed and position myself next to him.

You're always handsome in my eyes, Mommy. Have a good rest and dream. Sorry, yes. I can't stay alone.

Just reading a prayer and about to close his eyes, Mas Farhan suddenly woke up and glared at me. Suddenly, I gasped and got up all of a sudden. It's more scary than meeting a ghost. Just imagine, a room that is not so bright is only illuminated by a small LED light on the nightstand next to the bed, then the person next to you suddenly woke up while glaring sharply. The heart is not broken, thank God.

"Mas, why wake up? I'm shocked, lo," I said, neutralizing the heartbeat.

"Why sleep here? Less clear what my words were?"

"Mas, I'm afraid to be alone. The next room is near the tomb. Please let me be here."

"Your woe is why you're a coward."

Really 'amazing' this husband.

"Mas," please.

"May, but not in this bed."

My forehead shriveled, confused by his statement.

"If not on this bed, where would I sleep, Mas?"

"Whatever. The floor is still wide, huh."

Speechless.

Don't ask me the state of my heart. Repeatedly let down reality, making me like charred firewood devoured by fire. Instead of sleeping alone but not sleeping well, I got out of bed and slept on the floor.

...***...

Sweet greetings from sweet people. Haha. Don't forget to support my writing, my friend. So that I can encourage the next chapter. Hope it's entertaining, yeah. Of course, the benefits can be obtained.

Sumenep, Madura, East Java

Tuesday, 15 June 2021