YOUR LOVE BROUGHT ME HOME

Epsom.76

Reza was staying home today after dinner Reza approached me sitting in front of the house enjoying a cup of warm tea.

"Lin I want to talk to you about something"

"Please Re I'm listening to you"

"I wish we could start our relationship like we used to, I want us to end our quarrels all this time we started from scratch, I'll move back to work here"

"I also hope that our relationship is good - good for the future because however you are the father of children - my son "answer I take a deep breath and then exhale slowly.

"True Lin I'm so happy to hear that you're giving us a chance to reorganize our household" Reza said, holding my hand..

"I'm sorry Re"

"I've forgiven you Lin, why tonight I'm in front of you, I really miss you a lot"

"I'm sorry once again, I just want our relationship to be limited to a friend no more Re,however, we can equally take care of children with loving love if there is a dispute that occurs as before"

"You mean Lin"

"I want us to stay in a good relationship but I also want us to end our relationship as husband and wife"

"Why Lin, can't you open your heart to me anymore"

"I'm sorry Re because the feeling of loving you is not left in the slightest, my heart has gone far I hope you will understand"

"Can't you give me a chance" Reza said staring at me.

"I'm sorry Re"

Reza stepped inside the house with a grim look.

If the feeling of liking someone could be directed I would choose Reza according to the wishes of my late mother, if my heart ever hurt I would give Reza a second chance but my heart refused.

I'm not a person who falls in love easily, but I'm not a person who likes to play with other people's feelings I'll never come back when I'm really gone.

The night was getting late and as usual if Reza was at home I would sleep with my two daughters, I stepped into Reza's room sleeping on her face my heart felt pity "I'm sorry Re I can't give love to you like I used to, I've already given my heart to others" I whispered inwardly,after taking the blanket I stepped out of the room I chose to sleep with my two daughters.

Reza has been home for a week, there is no sign that he will return to the city of B.

I actually wanted to talk to him about our divorce but I feel the time is not right to say it because for one week ago Reza looked glum until I could not bear to convey my intentions that's.

This afternoon my mother-in-law came to my house since the first incident only today she returned to visit my house.

"Assalamualaikum" said my mother-in-law he immediately came to me who was busy ironing clothes belonging to my customers.

"Waalaikumsalam uh mama, how's it going ma, mama's healthy right?" I said and then regretted it.

"Alhamdulillah Mama's healthy son, where's Reza son"

"Some, you're watching with the kids"

And after the arrival of my in-laws that afternoon my relationship with my in-laws began to improve, this morning after driving the children to school Reza put some clothes that were still in my house into a suitcase I just kept looking at Reza who was busy with his activities.

I chose to do my cooking in the kitchen and Reza came to me who was busy cooking.

"Lin I want to talk to you" said Reza, I immediately stopped cooking and sat at the dining table next to Reza.

"Lin I'm going to sign a house and move back to work here, I don't want us to split up for that I give you time to consider everything, I'll wait until you can take me back"

My heart was filled when I heard Reza's words, after his departure I was stunned for a moment I was daydreaming, I myself was confused what I should have done to Reza because of a sense of not being able to control us,and my race towards Reza was only as a person who had been close to her precisely I only appreciated her as a fellow human being.

Reza may now have changed better to me from his treatment these few days but my love has become completely Bagas even though often now I feel sad when the distance separates us again.

Often we hear that letting go is much easier than keeping up but not for those who already love someone sincerely and give heart to the full soul.

That's how I feel right now my relationship with Bagas can be so long as not clear, even now he rarely calls me because he is too busy with his work, because he is too busy, my heart is so hurt by the longing that is always turbulent in my heart, let alone to meet communicating through cyberspace now feels difficult not infrequently Bagas long reply to the message I sent deliberately.

Many times I tried to end this story but I always failed not unable to find another but my heart was stuck with a one-way feeling that I myself was not sure could Bagas would walking towards me while Bagas seemed to have become an opium to me.

I've spent almost 5 months - days knowing when the meeting happened again.

"What so myself continue the contract work there yank"

"It's "answer Flat bagas.

"So when you come back to visit me again I miss yank"

"I don't know yet that while my work is so busy for now let it run like this, I will try to let you know if in my spare time "

The last words Bagas said at the end of our conversation this afternoon made me very sad,I miss him so much that when night comes greet me so lonely my heart is overcome with disappointment that I need the strength and support of Bagas but to call at night is rarely done.

To be honest I feel so stupid to keep something that constantly hurts hoping for something that is not sure.

Tears soaked my cheeks tonight I missed Bagas so much but his indifference was the sign that he did not want me and it could be that I just miss him to want to meet soon.

A wavering impulse made me try to contact him after a long wait for Bagas to receive a phone call from me.

"I'm sorry to interrupt" I told Bagas tonight.

"Who am I supposed to apologize because right now I'm really busy so rarely tell you, I'm not late yet, you're sick "

"I'm not sleepy"

"What could happen?"

"You can - usually it is so, you have changed you are not sensitive"

I immediately decided the phone call ended the chat with Bagas tonight,I was filled with anger but Bagas did not return to contact when I expected him to call me again tonight my tears and then broke after a while Bagas did not call me.

I woke up the clock showed at 5am let's not call send messages not done Bagas,my tears spilled back I was not angry at the circumstances that made us far apart at this time but which made me angry with Bagas' indifference to me at this time.