Trapped In Ambiguity

This Is Not the End

I stared at the window that showed the star-studded sky that night. I never thought I'd be on this plane, traveling all the way by myself, without a father, without a mother, without anyone I knew. Completely alone.

My mind recollected as I stared fixedly at the letter I had just received back then. The letter was like a dream to me, between believing it or not. I read it many times to make sure that what I saw was reality. I even pinched myself back then as proof it wasn't a dream.

"Dad, Mother," I cried with excitement, running towards those who were spending their afternoon in front of the TV.

"What's up, Del?" ask dad.

I gave the letter then looked at the face of the father and mother who began to sparkle, looking at me with a warm smile, happy.

"Mother believes this?" ask me without distracting him from the letter. "Our son is going to Harvard. I'm proud of you, Cil. Your efforts are not in vain." Father kissed my forehead gently, so did the mother who hugged me tightly while whispering the word 'congratulations'.

Yes, it was the letter I was waiting for a few days ago. The letter that was the reason I was on this plane. I was really happy until those tears of happiness fell on my cheeks. Although I won't be a university with Rega, at least I will be a city with him.

The coughing voice of a middle-aged woman made me realize from my daydream. I stared at the clock on my wrist. Soon I will land in America and set foot here for the first time.

The plane I was on landed safely. I got off this plane and went to get my stuff.

I looked around, looking for someone who said he would take me to my new home. It was hard for me to look for him among the hundreds of people who were also waiting for the arrival of others. Not to mention I don't know what that guy's face is. Huaaa, I'm only in many times with her name alone.

"Adel Picilia?" ask someone who suddenly comes up to me and says my name. I answered him with a small nod. "I'm Fransiska. You know me, don't you? I will guide you until you get used to it here," he replied with Indonesian language so fluent that it gave rise to a look of confusion and admiration that must be emanated clearly on my face. "Oh." He chuckles. " I'm a native of Indonesia, moved here three months ago," he continued, which made my curiosity disappear. Fortunately, he was sensitive.

We then drove a taxi to the apartment provided by the scholarship. In the taxi, Fransiska told me many things until the taxi stopped right in a building so big, soaring into the sky. I was really stiff, but thank goodness Frances led me to the front of a white door.

"This is your apartment" Fransiska said, opening the door with a key.

I stepped into the room, then looked around the room. The kitchen, the living room and the room are in this room. The equipment here is really arranged neatly. Very complete, the room was quite spacious for one person in the room.

"Tomorrow the day after tomorrow, I will come and take you to university. It's the key to your room" he said, then left and left me alone in this foreign city.

I left my suitcase, then laid my body on a mattress that was so soft after locking the door. My body was tired from that long journey.

“Devan, I'm in America now. Where are you?” gumamku.

I grabbed my phone from my pocket and called someone. “Ah, Devan, why not active,” disappointed me. I switched to dialing another number.

"Hello, Del," replied a voice from the phone across there.

"Sister, I did it. Successfully studied in America."

"You're serious?" the question sounds like half-disbelief.

"Yes, Brother."

"Are we a university?" ask again with his voice so excited.

"No, sis. But I'm at Cambridge."

"Oh, too bad we're not a college. But thank goodness you're here. I'll take you for a walk the day after tomorrow because I have a campus project to complete."

"I will wait for you, Brother " answered me and closed the call.

I stared at the ceiling of my room, I was not used to going away from my father and mother. My tears are falling because I miss. I remember how my mother cried when I got on the plane and how my father hugged me warmly while encouraging me.

"Cila,” call dad from behind that phone.

"Dad, how are you?" my many.

"It's only been one day that we've been apart, Cil, Cil."

"He he, I just arrived, Dad."

"Sep without father and mother."

"You must be very tired, rest."

“But I miss my father and mother.” My tears are dripping, wetting my pillow. Huaaa, the tears are coming down by themselves.

“You cry, Cil?” ask me to worry.

“This is the first time I've gone far without you guys by my side. I don't know how to run my routine here without you. There was no gentle call from mom to wake me up, no warm hug from dad when dad came home from the office. There is no such thing as eating with family.”

“Cil, Oil. You'll get used to it, honey. Initially it was heavy, but over time it will be easy, Kok. Spirit, yes,” exclaimed mother.

“Let me call you again. Drug mother, drug father.” I disconnected the phone and started crying in my solitude.

×××

I've been at this college for a week, the college where I met some really fun bullies. I thought it would be difficult for me to interact with them but in fact they were all so friendly, inviting me to get acquainted first.

"Are you hungry?" ask Alexa.

I nodded slowly. Alexa then grabbed my hand and pulled me into the cafeteria. I've been here a week and a week since I got Alexa. And every time he went to the cafeteria, he always clasped my arm. He said he was afraid that I would go. It's just a rather quiet canteen, Lexa, not such a vast wilderness.

We ordered some food, waited a while and took it to our table. I circulated my entire gaze in search of an empty table and finally found it exactly 1 meter in front of me.

Alexa. He is the one who is there when you need him, the one who always tells you at length and also hears your story. He's the one you brought to your house, he came right away. But he is a man who prefers men and food more than you, his best friend.

"Hi, Adel, it turns out that you are here, I was looking for you earlier" Naura said.

He is also from the same country as me. Although living in a country of people, he still uses Indonesian when meeting people who understand other Indonesian languages. He is someone who is really friendly and also cheerful. Her face is almost as beautiful as Alexa.

"Naura, I thought you had class," said Alexa.

"Have done," Naura replied with a smile towards Alexa.

"Let's eat the same," asked me.

"Um, sorry, but there's something I need to do. I'm looking for you to borrow your book that you showed me yesterday."

"Ughh! maybe I should learn Indonesia" Alexa sighed harshly which made me with Naura laugh.

“Let's just relax, I'll teach you,” I said to Alexa, who showed her a confused face because of my words.

I then took the book out of my bag and gave it to Farah.

"thank you. Bye, Adel, Bye, Alexa."

"Bye," I reply with Alexa at the same time.

Then I started eating my food. The food here is really good.

"Del, Del, Boy. He is very handsome.” point Alexa at a man who just stood up from his chair. "I need a minute." Alexa got out of her chair and went to the man. He then started greeting the man. I noticed those who were slowly getting familiar. Basic Alexa.

Alexa then went out of the canteen with the man, leaving me alone here. No matter what, I'm also used to myself but Alexa left her bag which means I have to wait for her, after all I won't be in class until an hour ahead.

I stopped eating when I vaguely heard someone calling my name. I looked around. Maybe I just misheard. Who knows me here except Alexa, Farah and some of my classmates.

"Dellong."