The Toga Rahayu

51

Like normal adult women in general after six years of not seeing Andika mas I tried several times to be in love with several different men. But I don't know why my heart can never accept them wholeheartedly. My heart is still intact for a man Andika, whether until when this will end.

During my work in Gersik three times I was in love with several men, first with my friend who was still in High School we happened to work in the same City. I tried to accept her love and date her, unfortunately the fabric of our story only lasted for one week. He couldn't stand it because I ignored him and didn't consider it to exist at all.

My man two who became my lover is Gunawan, he was one of the college friends back when he was in Malang, it just so happened that he also worked here just a divisional thing with me. Unfortunately, our relationship ran out in seven days because I did not want to be held hands or just watch together like young people in general.

Yes like that my heart still refuses to be with anyone other than Andika. In my deepest heart still very much hope that someday we will be reunited either in a position still equally alone or each of us has been paired.

Talking about being in pairs, I do not know if I will be able to if someday hear mas Andika already have a life partner or even already have children, if one day I will be able to, just imagining it is enough to make my horse feather stand how if it happened in reality maybe I would go crazy right then and there.

Mother and father also often remind me to quickly find a partner in life, other than because they are old they want to immediately ask for grandchildren. He slalu said not good single girls for too long will be “old maiden”. Father mother also wants to have a grandchild still strong hold.

Do you know whose third girlfriend I am?

Yes, my third girlfriend is Reno mas someone I met at the ceremony at the rectorate. He also played Ravana who stole Shita from Rama when we made a drama in Batu first.

I don't know what makes Reno mas can last up to three months to be my girlfriend, not without reason even I never considered her existence beside me. I never called him first, even if I just asked him how he was never.

Destiny reunited with Reno mas after several years did not meet, at that time me and some staff visited the supplier of raw materials for our factory food products. Unexpected mas Reno is the owner of the raw material supplier. Since the meeting was Reno trying to get close to me, the more I tried to dodge then Reno mas will get closer.

“Bu sorry in wait for his girlfriend in front”. Greet my men who tell.

“Pacar?”. I asked with a confused face.

“Pak Reno”, he answered briefly with a smile.

“Oh yes tell wait a minute”. Understandably I often forget that now have a boyfriend because I never thought of him at all.

Mas Reno why should I come here troublesome. I refuse to see him. Our relationship has been going on for almost three months but unfortunately there has been no progress at all.

You ask how I feel about Reno? The answer is empty. I don't have any feelings for Reno. I accepted it because of Kasian, if he told me that loving me from the beginning met when in the rector then until now.

Am I evil?

I don't know if maybe I'm so mean and this isn't fair to Reno, but how is this also part of my efforts, who knows by being in love with Reno mas I can forget Andika mas and begin to accept the existence of Reno mas. But unfortunately it's very difficult for me.

Rang

“What's done? I wait in front ya”. Ask Reno who has been waiting for more than thirty minutes in the company lobby.

“Sorry my job is still a lot of.”. I don't know why the arrival of Reno mas who every day pick me up makes it uncomfortable it feels like my space is getting narrower.

“Hay is it finished?”. Ask Reno who is still in the front lobby.

“Not yet mas, what is Reno go home first”. I bargained with him long ago I kasian too.

“No I wait here just”.

In the room I was still busy with a stack of papers, I was also reluctant to leave the room. At eight o'clock in the evening everyone started saying goodbye and I stayed alone.

In the silence of the room I thought it was true that my actions received Rama became my lover?

Rang...

The vibration of the mobile phone on my desk resuscitated my daydream that had been running to the middle of nowhere.

“Honey 'fair dong work, go home yuk do not be tired”. The sound of Reno still in the front lobby.

“Iya I'm down in a moment, this wants to get ready first”. I replied to the man who had been waiting for me for almost two hours in the front lobby, I don't know what it was like to be rusty.

Actually mas Reno also has a handsome face, his personality is also good, he is a beautiful child but somehow it is very difficult for my heart to turn away from the Andika mas and try to love him.

“Ah is probably all just a matter of time”. I said in my heart, I immediately went down to meet Reno mas who seemed to have begun to wait below.

“Mas next time do not have to pick me up from the slow wait like this, besides my cost is also near here just”. I told him I didn't want to bother him.

“Emang why? I want to make sure you get home safely”.

“I've been big times mas can be said to be old even”.

“Eat first yuk sure you are hungry once”.

“Baiklah”. Actually I'm not too hungry I'm also reluctant to spend too long with Reno mas. But I'd also like to refuse because he's been waiting in the front lobby for a long time.

Reno's car rushed out of the office, this time taking me to eat in a very far place. Yes my boarding house in Gersik and we are looking for food in Surabaya for longer time together he said.

I resigned my body was also very tired all day work, I was lazy to argue, I will answer every question given by mas Reno without intending to ask back about his life.

Am I evil?.