The Toga Rahayu

Kuiz

On Monday, I returned to my usual routine, I woke up early, even earlier than the usual day before leaving for campus I went to the boarding house first to pick up the iron that accumulates after a few days I leave the time to follow the race.

The iron basket was really full to make my mood this morning a little disturbed, I was tired after traveling a long way yesterday but I had to quickly complete my obligations first.

I decided to iron my mother's clothes first while waiting for the time to go to college later. One by one the clothes I trim and I iron until slippery, in a dreamy heart if I were rich I would not bother like this, when morning comes I will just think about what outfit I will use to go to campus today and what food I can choose for breakfast today.

After all the neatly arranged clothing irons all, I re-split my body while reading through a bit of material that will be learned today. Today there is a quiz of ingris and agricultural economics two subjects that I hate especially English. Last night after coming home from college I was desperately studying but still I was unable to understand it.

I don't like English courses the most, I have a bad past with this one lesson, I first got English lessons when I was in 5th grade, Elementary School, when I was a high school student I was always the class champion in my school.

There were no English teachers at the time at school so the school took teachers from outside to teach English in my class. At that time the teacher gave an assignment in the LKS book that must be done by students, I was completely foreign to English and I was not interested in learning it.

Some of my school friends are a little familiar with English they follow the bimbel outside school, although there are no English lessons at school but their parents have prepared early.

I don't blame my parents for not being able to send me to go to school, it's our family situation that makes our movement less limited, especially to eat, it's the situation of our family, eat and eat alhamdulilah.

I got a score of 20 at the time while my friends were over 80, I was really embarrassed because usually my grade was always the highest in the class. Because my lowest grade teacher told me to read the questions out loud and I couldn't read them properly and correctly. All my friends laughed at me with that value ever since I hated English so much.

I never want to learn English again when I was Junior High School and I was not interested in English at all. You ask how I finished the exam? Surely I cheated my friends who were around the bench during the exam, I swapped by cheating during the lesson that smelled count. This time it seems like I can only surrender to God's destiny I can't rely on anyone.

The clock shows at 09:30 I immediately went to college to start at 10:00 this time I did not bring doughnuts and molen when I went to campus, I was still very tired to sell.

I made my way to Building D on the third floor with shaky steps up one by one the stairs with a sour face, it seemed like I had lost before the war. I started to enter my class and look for a seat that was at the end of the day someone would be kind enough to cheat me.

“All good morning, ready for today's quiz” said bu Rizka as an English lecturer in my class.

“But ready bu”. All students answered. Miss Rizka just smiled in response.

The noise started to sound all the students shifting seats each other, I was really afraid of my fate, the quiz in this course holds 25% of the grades at the end of the semester.

The exam question is divided into 25 multiple choice questions and 10 essay questions. Like my shadow is only able to nod my head without knowing the meaning of the matter. Let alone to make the answer “ngawur” meaning because I do not know at all I curse myself.

My head turned round and turned to the right and left all looking fervently working on it. For the matter of multiple choice I choose with many-read sholawat, I will choose one letter when the sholawat is exhausted. For the essay I re-write the matter because I really don't understand it at all.

90 Minutes passed quiz finished. I let out a very long sigh when I stepped in to gather to the lecturer. I really resigned his resignation.

***

One week went by, today's share of the value of the quiz yesterday. I stared at the results of my quiz with a blank look of events a few years ago repeated again this time I got a score of 30. I was so upset that I had tried to learn as much as I could but indeed the foundation from the beginning was not strong was definitely collapsed.

I went to the library hoping to be smart after I got out of there. As usual I chose the corner seat, I re-opened the results of the quiz today, without feeling my tears flowing. I feel like I'm a complete idiot for college, getting a scholarship, but I can't give my best.

I continued to cry as much as I could at the end of the front end of the computer that was covered in bulkheads. I'm so ashamed of myself, I'm afraid that like this will continue to impact the scholarship I got here.

I promised myself and my parents I would learn better to try harder to change our family's lives.

Almost all lecturers here use English when at the power point makes me have to interpret one by one to understand the meaning. I also just know it turns out here if you want to register graduation later must take the tofl test with a minimum of 500 minutes. How can I improve the family economy? I wasn't sure I could pass it by passing the tofl 500.

Hihi hihihihi hihihi I keep crying sobbing crying over my own stupidity. I don't care if anyone hears this cry of mine, I keep crying even more sobbing. Maybe people will assume “for sure out of breakup” I don't care, I just want to vent my disappointment on myself.

Suddenly someone patted me on the back.

“Why are you crying?”