Talak After Shah

Memories

I sat on the balcony with a cup of warm tea after the morning prayer. The tea that had been on the table had not been touched. My eyes glared at the sky which began to show a tinge of orange on the eastern horizon. There was a strange feeling suddenly running through my heart. Immediately I rubbed my chest while beristighfar. The voice of my second child who happened to be returning home a week off from his service was heard by my ears. To me it was the universal shredded voice of a hafidz. Ahh yes, I am a lucky widow, I have three children, all of whom are Quran memorizers.

To reduce the sudden cloudiness in my heart, I got out of my chair and walked towards the balcony. I inhaled a deep breath of air as I continued to take a stand.

I know what causes this turmoil in my heart. Today is the 25th of March.that means, exactly fifteen years ago.well, fifteen years ago my husband, Andi, looked at me.

Not feeling my tears flowing, I was stunned to remember all the memories that were so painful for me. My tears are pouring in, all those memories are dejavu, like they just happened this morning. It feels like just this morning Andi is stalking me.

"Mother"

Soon I wiped my tears with the hijab before turning to my son, Mikail.

Soon she hugged me from behind and kissed the top of my head. He didn't seem bored, he hugged me.

"Mother why? mom crying, huh?"

I shook my head and immediately showed the best smile on my face that started to wrinkle.

I held my hand warmly, and looked at my bead as if in disbelief and demanding an answer.

"What should I answer"

"Stop crying mom. Mother don't cry anymore. Mommy remember what you said on the night of the graduation celebration so the army yesterday?"

Deg, my heart immediately beats in shock considering how angry my son was on the night of the celebration.

"The mother was crying because it was so happy to have children like you, happy mother can finally get together again with you guys"

The sound of crouching from the stairs, my son and I turned to the stairs. Before long, two faces appeared. My daughter, the eldest Naura and the youngest Adam.

"Nyerobot is my sister" the youngest put a sulky face and sank spoiled in my hands.

"Heiii, I, akuuu" Naura the eldest followed the nyerobot took my right hand. Finally the brother relented and muttered indistinctly.

The ayuk and adek immediately looked up at the manyuning brother saw his brother spoiled with their mother.

"Have you finished your salary?" ask my two children who just came.

Compactly they nodded.

"If you have memorized the Qur'an, but it must be repeated often so as not to forget"

"ready mom" they answered compactly.

"Is it over for breakfast?" the sister asked.

Naura shook her head and displayed a horse smile to her sister.

"yes, let the mother cook for our breakfast".

"No mother, let sister make her breakfast. Mother must taste the cuisine of sister"

"help me brother" Adam quickly interjected, he was so enthusiastic.

Mikail just nodded her head, without command, my two boys rushed down the stairs leading to the kitchen.

Stay now I'm alone with my daughter. Naura will be 22 years old in November. It didn't feel like the little girl I left overseas had grown into a beautiful girl. His skin was white, his nose was sharp, his hair was long brown and now he was tall. He is far above me. Maybe that's because I was teaching him to swim with my office friends when I was an honorary in private school.

"mom why see ayuk like that?, ayuk beautiful huh?" and selorohnya while laughing. I smiled at him.

"And Ayuk is the single most beautiful child in the world"

Hahhahaa.

"Mother does not forget yes to the answer mother first, first as a child Mother always answered that if I asked"

My eyes were misty, suddenly hot and my tears were flowing.

"sorry mommy ya son" quivered my voice as I said that.

Segara Naura embraced her mother. stroked the shoulders of the woman he loved so warmly.

"don't cry anymore mother, please please"

I will immediately remove my tears.

"where is the hijab?, never remove it except during the shower"

"at home, there's no one"

I nodded hearing his answer.

"yes, yes later ayuk wear, now also ayuk will take the hijab"

I smiled hearing his answer. Then rushed Naura down.

I sat back in my chair and sipped the tea that had been on the table. One by one the memories that had been decades passed flashed in my eyes. The destruction of my marriage, my struggle to support my children, until I finally left them wandering, complaining of fate to the land of people.

Yes Rabb, it's hard to remember that. My tears are flowing.

"Mother"

I quickly wiped my tears, I didn't want this time Adam to see me crying.

"come down, brother's done making breakfast"

Lovingly guided her hand down the stairs to the dining table. The smell of cooking was so pronounced when I arrived in the kitchen. On the table has presented four dishes containing fried rice and eggs ceplok.

"This is the cuisine of the famous chef mother, rarely there is a cooking soldier in the kitchen" continued Adam.

I smiled proudly at both of them. Immediately I scoop the fried rice, enjoy it.

"Where's bun?" ask Mikail impatiently

I lifted both my thumbs. And the three of them clapped.

This morning, although I started with a cry because I remember my dark past, but I will live happily because of the three fruits of my heart that I love so much.

I promise in my heart, I will never remember my wounds. I want to fill my old days with happiness in my own way.

I, I am Indah Yuliani, a widow of an ex-TKW Arab, who left her son to the land of the people, who was being looked after by her husband because.....