Suicide Notes
Love is Unrequited
“*If you really like me, you should do everything for me. Aren't people in love capable of crazy things? Killing me that humbles you must be just a simple matter*.”
...~•~...
“I miss you. You have not visited the foundation for a long time,” exclaimed a teenager who immediately turned to Victor.
“I have a lot of business behind this.” Victor patted the back of the teenager named Luna. “You're not going to school?”
“You always say that when it's just a walk and do not want to appear in the foundation.” Luna puffed her cheeks in annoyance. “You don't even know it's Sunday.”
“Really? Sorry, sorry, I forgot.” Victor laughed loudly. "How's school? All right?"
Tama bit her lower lip. Since yesterday, Victor had always directed a cold gaze and spoke in a cynical tone at him. He thought, it was indeed Victor's nature, but looking at the scene in front of him at this moment ...
It seems Victor does hate Tama. The difference in his attitude was obvious, making Tama envious. What's the point of keeping up with Victor, if he's just gonna get hurt?
Luna peeked out from behind Victor's body. “New volunteers you brought?”
“Not important. Where are the others? Did they go for a walk?” Victor hugged Luna's shoulder, taking her away. “There are any events in the foundation?”
Tama is unable to persuade herself to leave Victor. He wanted to stay near the man even though he looked like a stalker. Tama's going wherever Victor goes.
Victor turned, entered the children's play area. He greeted them and played with them. For a second, Tama thought Victor hating her might just be an illusion.
“Do you make your sister angry?” said Luna who had been in front of Tama since when.
“Ya?”
“It looks like you made big brother very angry, he doesn't even want to talk about you.” Luna made her statement clear.
“Oh-ah, it looks like so,” reply Tama awkwardly.
“It looks like you did a very bad thing. I've never seen an angry sister,” muttered Luna. “I haven't introduced myself. My name is Luna, 16. I've lived here two years. Greetings know.”
“I Tama, two-“
“You come to play?” Without waiting for Tama's reaction, Luna pulled the older woman.
Being among the children turned out to be more exciting than Tama imagined. Even though Victor avoided eye contact, at least the man did not show any overt dislike.
“You're going home?” A tall man and a rough face approached Victor.
“That's. Any problems?” answer Victor.
The burly man did not say anything, but his face seemed reluctant to let Victor go home. “You okay?” the man said in the end.
“Do I look sick?” Victor put on a confused expression. To be honest, he understood the direction of this conversation, but he did not want to continue.
“You're healthy, I can see it.” The big man nodded with dissatisfaction. “Last-lately I thought of something.”
“If it's annoying, I don't want to hear.”
“I'm starting to regret handing jagdkommando to you. At night, sometimes I dream you-“
“Joe,” by Victor. “I did not interfere in your affairs without permission. So, please do the same to me.”
“If you use it, it feels like I did it myself,” continued Joe. “It's scary.”
“You are my savior,” hiss Joe. “Much different with those kids.”
“More torturing right? If not so, mana deserves to be referred to as punishment.” Victor shrugged his shoulders. “Again I may never use jagdkommando. Takes up a lot of time and is too painful.”
“No. Not just about that.” Joe hastily denied. “I don't want anything bad to happen to you. Although not because of jagdkommando, I don't want you-“
“Come, Joe. I told you not to interfere with my life,” cut Victor. He waved and left. “Jalani just your life. There are many other things you should think about.”
There are a lot of things that Tama wants to ask, about Joe, Luna, and others. However, without even trying it could be seen Victor was reluctant to respond. The park will keep the question until Victor's mood is better.
“Outstanding.” Victor stopped stepping. “For a spoiled child, you are quite great for not complaining after walking 2 Km back and forth.”
Tama's heart was about to explode when she found out Victor was talking to her. He wasn't even sure what he would reply. “A-aku-“
“Go.”
The cold gaze reminded Tama that he was the one blacklisted by Victor. The folded hand in front of the chest was clearly wanting to expel him as far as possible. Tama shook her head. “No.”
Victor sighed. “What do you want in my house? Tease me?”
“You are as jerk as Will,” muttered Tama. “Face two.”
“Ho .. why are you only aware of it now?” Victor lowered his hand. “Knowing the guy you like is not as great as you imagine, must be disappointing. Isn't that a good reason to go?”
Tama shook her head with all her might.
“You're the sickest person I've ever met. No matter what you do, nothing will change. If you want to make me like you, wait for me to die.”
Tama's eyeballs were rounded, not believing what she was hearing. No, no crying. Tama tried to hold back her tears.
“What? Still insisting? Alright.”
Victor pulls Tama's hand violently into the house. With a stiff face, he forced Tama to hold a strange object that looked like a knife. It had three sharp sides that twisted each other. And now, the end leads to Victor's heart.
“K-you want what?” Tama's hand trembled in Victor's grip.
“Proving my words. Didn't I tell you, I won't like you unless I die,” Victor's wrath. “Didn't you really want to grab my attention? Kill me, and you will succeed!”
Tama clasped tightly onto the handle of the strange blade. “Really! Like those. Isn't being rejected painful? You're heartbroken, aren't you? Push as hard as you can, and I can be sure I won't survive. Your revenge will be avenged.”
“Omong empty!” shout Tama. His free left hand floated up to Victor's cheek, holding back any words of provocation that the man wanted to spit out. “Omong empty! I hate you! Hates you so much!”
The pain made Victor sober and let go of Tama's hand, letting his strange knife fall. After the clang of the knife stopped, only the sound of Tama's sobs remained in the small house.
“What did I just do? I ... got out of control,” Inner Victor, dropped him.
The long minutes in silence ended when Tama stopped crying and said, “You would have liked me so much if I had killed you.”
Sure oes. Victor would be very, very grateful if Tama helped his greatest wish. Tama will be more meritorious than the orphanage that raised Victor. But Victor would not answer that question.
“I read it,” Og Tama. “When you take a shower, I read the book I saw this morning. About you who wanted to kill yourself.”
...~•~...
