Should We Get Married?

Forgive Me

I haven't been able to close my eyes after stealing my father's conversation with Arum. He was indeed introgated all-out by my father and two brothers because Arum who had made me meet again with Juan, even though my father had evacuated me to the house of Eyang.

Apparently Juan's parents were the masterminds of it all. Those who terrorized my family, threatened her father Arum, influenced the Tio family of course with threats as well and made the Yuda mas lost their jobs. The effect of their selfishness. Although Juan did not know even against the attitude of his parents, still, in my eyes is the most guilty. If he hadn't done it all, his parents wouldn't have done anything to our family.

There was a reason that made me want to shout at him. He committed that crime because he loved me. Of love? I want to laugh while scolding him. What kind of love is it, instead of giving good, destroying the person he says he loves? Again, I regret that if he really loved me, why should I? Why not another woman. There are not many beautiful girls out there, highly educated and from respectable families.

Juan, he is the only son of a successful businessman and one of the rulers of this city. He is my upperclassman in High School. Now he has graduated High School.I just found out that he also studied at the same campus as I had been looking for so far. Only the different faculties.

When it happened, Juan was on semester break. Arum said, he had just had a fight with his parents. When his mind was upset, he drank alcohol, then went to school to see me. Apparently Juan's been following me since we got out of the school gate. Juan kept waiting until I and my three best friends finished eating and taking pictures. As soon as I went home alone, then he launched his action.

At Arum, Juan admitted he did not intend to do all that. He just wanted to be close to me for a moment to let go of all the burdens in his heart. But the devil had entered his mind until he was determined to do the deed. That was the story with Arum that was told back to my family members. Unfortunately I don't believe it. Maybe it was just his way of being forgiven and his case was considered finished.

"Not sleeping, Yu?" tika went into the room. He forced a smile. "Still sick?" He asked, sitting on the edge of the bed to tidy up my blanket.

"Mr," I said.

"Hmm, uh,"

"Sorry Ayu yes."

"Lho, what for? You're a bad boy."

"Mom!" I ran into Tikaa's arms. I know, right now his feelings are definitely not okay. He must have been heartbroken after being decided unilaterally by the Tio mas family. Which woman whose heart was not broken when her dream of marriage was left one step behind. "If you want to cry Yo cry just tho." I said.

"Lha, it's not like you, so why cry?"

"The boy pretended to be the toughest. Ayu already knew everything from Arum. Ayu has also met Tio and his family. They can't do all that to mbak."

"What are you going there for? You must have been scolded by his father, huh?"

"Little."

"Yes wes, tomorrow-tomorrow don't be rash. If you want to do something, say it first."

"So what Yu. It's not your fault either. His name is not a soul mate, so you have to be patient. We can't get everything we want. God knows what's best for his servant."

"Mbak .. don't give up, yeah." I asked.

"Yes, don't talk about it anymore. Let's just say the proposal never existed." even though Tika tried to smile, but her facial water showed sadness.

"But mbak, mas Tio is still fighting so that you can unite. So don't give up either. Keep fighting. Ayu will also do whatever it takes to get everything back to the way it used to be."

"Yu .. It's over. I don't want you to talk about that anymore, yeah "

"But why? Mas Tio said he wanted to try to melt his father's heart."

"Even if his father's heart could melt, he would not want to go back with him."

"Mama, what is that? Tio is not wrong. This is all purely because of Juan's family. Please, just be patient for a moment. Ayu was sure they could understand later. Didn't you say that Tio and his family were good people?"

"Yu .. can you accept your father and mother-in-law who have insulted your father and sister? They will watch over you and your father with a curse that is very hurtful. Okay, mas Tio does not want this wedding plan Batak, but he could be silent when his father uses our father without saying anything. He only hopes to understand and forgive. Ma'am's been hurt, Yu. He had already made the hearts of men who became first love mbak destroyed, then how could I see them back with a good view? A plate that has been broken, even if glued back, the shards can never be hokangy. Is that what people say? So too with my heart!"

"Mom!" I started crying in Tika's arms. Because I have no mother since I was a child, Tika is my place to shed sadness. "Father has become a problem for mbak, father and mas Yuda. Because of Ayu you all get in trouble. Ayu is completely useless. I think Ayu just wants to die. I don't deserve to be part of this family. Owen ...."

"Astagfirullah Yu, what are you talking about? You no longer want to hear words like that from your mouth. We are people who have a religion. No matter what test God gives, it must be appropriate. Don't just talk, it's not good to keep complaining. Ma'am, father and mas Yuda have also tried to sincerely accept everything. Now it's important we both try to get that justice. If you think like that, it's the same as adding new problems and it's harder for us. You see, Dad, how I try to be strong. You must be strong too."

"But mbak ... Ayu is really sorry, Ayu ...."

"Here, don't think about it anymore. You're not wrong either, Yu. It's calamity. Nobody wants everything to happen."

"Ayu's lifetime will feel guilty. It's all because of Ayu. Why should it happen to us. Why?"

"No Yu, you're a good brother. This is part of God's destiny that we must live sincerely. Do not deny what God has told you. We should be patient. Come here Yu, sincere."

Juan, this is all because of you. I continued to grieve the man, who had heartily ruined my future, and made the wounds of the people I loved. Apologizing alone won't be enough, my hatred for him is already really big.