Should We Get Married?

People in the Market

Me and I walked to the market. Nothing has changed. It's the same as when I was a kid. It's not been nearly five years that I haven't set foot in this market. I can't wait to enjoy lupis with my favorite Javanese sugar and getuk lindri.

Entering the market area, as usual, many recognize eyang because in this village the eyang family is quite famous. In the past, before he died, eyang Kakung was a respected village head. The family was also very well-off, but once Kakung died, the treasure was slowly used up by Mr. De for the needs of his family.

At that time, the father who also had the same rights to the wealth of his parents did not demand much. Just ask that Mr. De not disturb the house occupied by the princess and some rice fields for the cost of living.

"Eh eyang, want to shop ya." the mothers of mature vegetable sellers call eyang. "This is his grandson, right? His name is Ayu, right?"

"Yes. It's Ayu. Who used to often take it to the market time two small." Answer eyang.

"What's going viral, right?" continued again.

The smile on his face disappeared. So do I. It felt like my world was dark. Apparently he knew what happened to me that made me feel ashamed. I feel very uncomfortable.

"How's it going? True granddaughter eyang in ..., sorry eyang, is that true, Ayu harassed?" he asked with a curious face.

"We'll go shopping first. Excuse me." replied calmly. Then he guided my hand away. "Not to be taken heart, Yu. People like that just want to know. Without caring about our feelings. It's not ethical to ask that question." Eyang.

We walked quickly to the chicken seller, buying the vegetables and seasonings needed. Then it passed quickly without stopping by the small food vendors I had previously wanted to sell.

I no longer have any taste for eating any snacks. I'm so embarrassed. It felt like running away, hiding so that no one could see me.

Back then, as it went from one seller to another, I felt like I was being interrogated. Everyone looked at me with a bad look. They kind of question what happened to me.

I shouldn't have come! I'm ingrained. Meeting people right now is not a good choice for me. My tears just spilled. If I don't remember getting embarrassed, I might have fallen there. The legs were completely limp viewed with such a gaze.

"Yu, don't put your heart in. It's wrong, you shouldn't take you to the market." Eyang hugged me tightly while we were in the room. Its alright. We will get justice. It'll all be back to how it was."

I don't know. In fact, to hope that everything would come back the way it was for me felt impossible. I'm afraid it'll just be an empty hope because it feels impossible. I'm no longer holy, I'm stained, dirty.

"Eyang, Ayu wants to take a shower first." I said, as I passed leaving eyang.

One, two, three water spouts wet my head. It's chilly. Not stopping there, I re-wetted the entire body many times, hoping that the stain could disappear, but still attached strongly.

"Dirty ... dirty .. dirty!" I screamed while beating my whole body so tired, then fell back to the bathroom floor.

***

Mr. De, Bu De and Arum have just arrived, they're just three without Tio's mas. I have no intention of seeing them. The door to my room is still locked. Still not ready to act like a normal person after what happened.

"Yu ... Ayus. Come out, this is it; Mr. De, Mr. De and Arum have come." Said from outside. Not coming out yet, he finally knocked on the door.

There was no other choice, I had to meet them. Without further ado, just shave, then go back into the room.

"Hi Yu, how are you? Healthy tho you. Where is it accepted?" Arum was following me. Actually, I was lazy to talk, but it was not good also nyuekin my cousin, especially he had already entered the room. Said you were accepted into UI medicine, tho?" he hasn't given up.

"No." I replied, briefly.

"Mosos? In my school, the news was everywhere."

"Oh,"

"Yes, aren't you back?"

"No. I'm staying here."

"Not giving spirit to Mbak Tika?"

"What spirit?"

"Huh, time?" I got straight out of bed.

"Hoooh. That means you don't know, do you?"

"Da .. Where do you know? What the hell's going on? Tell me, Rum!"

"The Tio family cancelled the wedding plans because ...."

"Because what?"

"But you're not offended."

"Yes. Quick story because what?"

"That's ... Mas Tio's family objected the same thing that happened to you."

"meaning?"

"Yes they object to marrying a woman whose sister was told**"

"Astaghfirullah," I suddenly drowned, fortunately my body fell into bed.

"Lho Yu, what's wrong with you? Don't faint tho. Later if you know me who knows, you can be angry with Yu just like me. You meant me for the story."

"Oh Allah, Mbak Tika," I immediately cried, imagining how Tika felt at this time. He was so cheerful when proposed to mas Tio, his friend who both worked in the factory. But it turned out that marriage had to fail and what struck me, I was the cause of that failure. My sin was the cause of my brother's failure to get married. All this time Mbak Tika has sacrificed a lot for me, I don't think I could if he had to sacrifice again.

"Yu, don't cry dong. Later if you hear me, I can be scolded."

"I have to how?"

"Duh, I don't know Yu."

"Rum, can you ride the motor tho? Please deliver me."

"Where's Yu?"

"To his house mas Tio."

"Well, what's Yu?"

"I have to talk to all of them, especially to Tio and his family. Ma'am Tika is not wrong, he does not deserve all this. Ma'am Tika should get her happiness."

"Duh, don't be reckless Yu. Wedding plans have been canceled, even the proposal rings and gifts have also been asked back. There's no way it's gonna be back to how it was."

"I don't care. What matters is that I have to meet them. Please Rum, help me, meet me with them."

"Duh, you are yes." Arum seemed to think. He finally accepted my request. We agreed that we would not tell anyone about my plan.

***

"Could it be Eyang. Ayu really wanted to take a walk out for a while to get some fresh air." I said.

"Where else are you going, Yu? Never mind. Just stay home. Later if anyone says strange you are hurt." said Mr. De.

"God will be nothing, Mr. De. Ayu went with Arum." Love again.