Playboys

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I didn't know it felt like it was gonna hurt like this. No heartbreak is pleasant, if

there meant he was really not a human being who had feelings. I've been

I convinced myself not to cry, but my tears remained

flow without being asked. Crying does not mean we are weak, it is because we are

it was too strong to hold everything by itself.

I can still clearly remember how flat Dimitri's face was when he met

with yesterday. I don't blame him, I don't justify it. Till

now I don't understand what the problem is connecting these three men and also

Michelle. They were all on Michelle's side, and I was on her side

don't understand anything. I should have done something, but I chose not to

doing anything.

You can use me wholeheartedly. I used to defend my ego by not revealing

whatever feelings I had with Dimitri. Now when I admit it,

I had accepted defeat even before the war. I am airy

bada accepted it, stupid of me.

Since this whole region is not on my side, I decided to go back to people's homes

my old. There I can find a calmness I don't find here. I

didn't take my cut, just sacrificed a little time to fly to

Jogjakarta. Although it would be exhausting, it's okay, just be with my parents.

I've asked Eka to book a day flight for Friday’at, and

now I just leave. I just wanted to take a leave of absence, though,

to rest my body, but leave also requires signature

Dimitris. Even if that guy's gonna know where I'm going, at least I don't

need to come face to face with him before I go and he'll ask me for an excuse

my departure.

It's too complicated and I don't like it. I'm just gonna do something simple.

Two days is enough for me to calm down. I will return with my soul

new, with the real Liliana, not this melancholy. I

I don't even recognize myself right now.

I didn't tell my parents this, maybe I'll give it to them

surprise for them. I haven't visited them in a month either,

they didn't say it, but they definitely wanted their son to come

pay a visit.

“Eka, for a meeting with the multimedia section please replace it, yes? Remainder

with clients on Saturday, please stay down until Monday. Residual report

this you can put in the office only, if there is something important you can directly email aja.”

Eka recorded all of it in the little book she always carried. My plane's still three

it will be late afternoon, but I have to leave now. I'm back on clearance, and

maybe my salary will be cut because of this. Who cares, I still do

have savings and the company still needs me.

“I'm leaving now, yes.”

I took my bag and walked out the door. “Be careful on the road Bu Lili.”

I smiled then actually got out and headed straight for the elevator. My witness has

wait downstairs, and hopefully there's nothing surprising on the way

to the lobby like before.

**

The taxi stopped in front of an old Javanese style house that looked simple and also

snugly. My parents' house is in Sleman, in Brangwetan. I always

I feel happy when I go home like this. For the size of a rare child

coming home like me, it's worth a lot to me.

There was guilt tucked away when I returned to this house, I always carried

a sin my parents did not know. That's what always holds me back

they always go home, but this time I

ventured, because I was too tired of everything and

I need my parents.

I knocked on the brown wooden door, and soon I heard

an inside cry to wait a while. Ah, it must be Mom. I'm so

missed him.

“Mira!” Mom hugged me as soon as she saw me at the door. I contacted him directly

hugged him tightly. My mother's warm embrace that I can't get anywhere

others.

Oh yeah, I also have a variety of nicknames, depending on what other people want

what do I call me. My name is Liliana Almira Leena. My pals

or a co-worker used to call me Liliana, but at home, my parents

calling Mira from Almira.

“You don't want to go home, I will be ready.” Me and my mom

walk into the house and sit on the sofa. Mother still with her surprised face

mixed with a happy face, I just smiled and saw that.

“Kan be a surprise, “ said. I went back into his arms again, I

I really want to be hugged at the moment. There's no way I can tell

my problem is with Mom, so I just want to be hugged, so I know there's still something

with me, who still loves me sincerely.

“Where's father, Bu?”

I got there when it was late afternoon, and you should be home because

it's almost dinner. “You came home at the right time, Nduk, Pak Wibisana's family wants to eat

night at our house,” said Mother with a very wide smile.

The Wibisana Family? It's like I've heard that name before. I raise

brow tried to recall the name. “That's it, your SMA temen time

it wants to be in the same match you,” said Mother.

I'm slack. That Wibisana sir, he's a rice paddie in the next village, and

I worked with Mr. Wibisana for his business. There are some rice fields

not far from this house, which was owned by both my parents. There are some

the worker takes care of the rice field, and the Father just watches over it.

If it has entered the harvest, all the rice here will be brought to the place of sir

Wibishana. I've told you this several times, about the matchmaking

aslo. I didn't respond too much because I thought it was just a joke. Akuu

I didn't think this was really happening. How many men are in my life

this time?

**

I was shocked to see my presence at home. I really enjoyed the face

that and his embrace of course. My father was the first man I trusted,

then there was Dimitri. Yes, Dimitri. Can I still believe it

now it?

Dinner went well. Pak Wibisana's son who he said would be betrothed

with me also present, she looks good, her tan skin is mature and her body

strapping. Almost as handsome as Dimitri with darker skin. It manages

his father's business, which made me remember Dimitri was,

his face was equally cold and spoke sufficiently.

I do like that type of guy, the kind of guy who challenges me but

troublesome too. I did like to trouble myself a long time ago, so

let it. It's really weird if I can get a guy so easily, anyway

I never made it with my relationship either.

That morning, when I just woke up from my sleep, I decided to take a walk

around the rice fields. The morning air here is amazing and fresh, I haven't

ever found something like this when in Jakarta, only the distress

There was no chatter about matchmaking last night, just introductions, and I thought

Dewa—anak Pak Wibisana—t too interested in me. We exchanged numbers

cell phone, and he hasn't called me. I don't want to expect more

everything flows as it should.

“You again have a problem, Nduk?”

My mother and I were sitting in a small bamboo hut on the edge of the rice field, where the farmers were

it releases fatigue. We enjoyed a breakfast consisting of pastries

this traditional while paying attention to the farmers who are pulling grass

that's.

“Mira always has problems, Mom, Mira's job is getting heavier while stepping up.”

I put my head back on Mom's shoulder.

I never told Mom or Dad about my troubles, I didn't want to

burden them with all my complaints. Let's just let him know something good

from the only girl, but I'm not a girl anymore.

“If you are tired of rest, Nduk, do not

suspended. This house is always open for your return, Mother and Father too

always here,” said Mother while stroking my head fondly.

Mom and Dad always asked me to come home, because I was the only child and always

I want the best for me. I don't need to work hard like this

actually, I just need to be here with them, but I always have

other opinions and my parents always hold me back. I have the best parents

the world's.

I hugged Mom tightly. “Mira must be home, Mom. Praying for the best always

create Mira, Bu.”

Mom kissed the top of my head, and unconsciously the tears were flowing. I always didn't

to disappoint them, I always do my best. They

it is a precious treasure that I have beyond anything.

“God is a good man, if you don't mind maybe you can try to meet again

same him.”

That god is actually my upperclassman, he's the head of OSIS and I was a member. She's ever been

a few times to take me home, when Mom asked I would go straight

answer he is a friend, yes we are indeed friends but his position is sister

my class.

“Mira will try, Bu.”

**

Two days is a really short time. Sunday afternoon I have to go back

flying to Jakarta, it was exhausting indeed, but at least my head was a bit

a little light in my parents house.

I'm already on my way to the airport, with the Gods driving me. Mom and Dad

doing very well this time, after I had refused so much

the match my parents gave me. Who wants to be matched anyway

when the era is as sophisticated as this, but in the end I still do not

get any man, as sophisticated as any era develops.

There's not much we talk about in the car. The god is also quiet, and

I don't know what topic I want to discuss. The car stopped right in front of the door

go in.

“I go first, Mas,” I said before getting off the car.

“Be careful. Lili—“

I looked at him like he wanted to say something. “Do you mind if I

later visit to Jakarta?”

I smiled at him, well, after all just visiting, right? I also want to

realizing Mom's desire to try to get close to this guy, who knows

with a human heart? I could love him tomorrow.

“Bby, Mas. Call me when you visit.”

He just gave a nod and smiled, and I got out of the car. I still am

must face this slightly bitter reality of life.

An hour later I landed safely in Jakarta. It's eight o'clock

the night and the taka da that hit me, after all many taxis will wait

out there. My steps came to a halt when I saw the man I avoided already

stand at the exit. I told you this guy could always find me

whatever the situation.

We looked at each other for a few seconds, I went straight to him with

with a big smile, someone picked me up. “You can always find me,”

I said when I got in front of him. I don't think we're talking yet

ever since I met him and Michelle in the office lobby yesterday.

“You never told me you were going home,” he said expressionlessly.

I kept showing her my big smile. “I just miss Mom, same Dad

aslo. Do I have to report to you the same problem?”

He didn't answer anything, just walked away, and I followed him. What are you guys

think I didn't feel anything when I met this guy? I still can

I felt that pain, but it seems like my brain has cleared up because

go home, I can think well now.

This man, my best friend, who is also this man of mystery, who still holds a million

secret to me. I don't know but I still love her, how is that possible

that love can be easily lost. I wouldn't expect much from him,

it will only add to my disappointment. If he thinks I'm a friend, then

I'll be his best friend. If it's more than that, I don't know, if being his best friend is possible

make us close, then I better be friends with him.

Cintatakak is as easy as I thought.

The car stopped in front of my apartment building, I didn't have a suitcase, just a handbag

what I used to wear when I worked. I still have a lot of clothes at home

my parents, and all my needs were there, too, so I didn't have to bring them

lots of stuff when you get home.

“You didn't ask me anything?” tanyakanya.

After all that time, he just asked me this, I really don't

recognize this man. “Are you going to answer when I ask? Or you

just going to be silent?”

Dimitri sighed heavily, I felt the same way, but he

treat me like I'm a foreign woman. “I need time to

think.”

Everyone also needs time for himself, what he thinks is just him

who suffers here?

“Take as much time as you want, and if you can't give me an answer yet

so don't come to me. I'm still your best friend who is ready to hear all the complaints

your case is.”

I immediately went down without saying goodbye. My heart aches from saying that. I love her, I love her,

and I hurt myself for loving her. My tears are coming down

slowly, I don't want to remove it. I want my heart to know how much water is

the eyes I had brought out because of the man who became that friend. Just this

all I can do for myself.

**

Hiiii sorry to wait a long time yes, hopefully this part is entertaining as usual huh. Do not forget to comment and give criticism and advice^^^

Happy reading everything

oh yeah, let's get closer, you don't need to call me thor. just call me a name just to be more familiar