My Love Story With 5 Men's

Circumstances that confuse me

Negative thinking is a trait that everyone has. Sometimes or even often it happens to us ourselves to misjudge something. I don't know if this greeting I misjudged Brother Richy or I just laughed emotion for a moment. I don't know who's wrong and who's right between us. I realized before I broke up with her, I kept asking questions about the woman named Ovi. Richie always said he didn't know the woman. Maybe when I kept asking questions, his condition was very cape. So he sprained for a moment, and asked to end the relationship with me. But I didn't give up, I waited almost two weeks for news from him, but he himself didn't give me any news. So I thought maybe he really didn't want me. So what is my fault if I have a relationship with another man??. He even accused me that I was the reason we broke up, because he thought I was deliberately looking for an excuse to accuse him of being with another woman. So that I can get in touch with another man. I don't understand what's going on between me and Richie's brother, whether it's been a misunderstanding.

Everything has happened, there is no point in me thinking about who is wrong and who is right. Even though he accused me, my mouth was able to say that I hated him, but my heart said I could not hate him, I still loved him. In my heart I asked - ask, do you still love me??.

I can only talk to myself....

"Why did you go??. Don't you know that I love you so much. When you decided on me and chose to leave, I really needed you, but you left me".

Me and Brother Diki always establish communication, although at the end of this I did not respond too much every time he called me. I don't love him, but the reason I didn't respond to him is because I have to focus on my UAN, and he knows that. And I also avoid the phone from him, because when he calls me, his friends both female and male friends often hear our conversation. I'm always dodged by his close friends. I'm often in the words of dating a high school boy, and sometimes his boyfriend is his own contract friend. They often say that his ex Kak Diki always played their contract. I don't feel jealous in the slightest, even his ex once said from afar when I communicated with Diki's sister, that Diki still likes me. Kak Diki who heard her ex say that to me, she just asked her ex to be quiet and Kak Diki's other friends laughed. It's just that I feel friends Kak Diki does not appreciate me, so I am lazy to pick up a call from Kak Diki.

A few weeks later, after UAN ended, I chose to go home with my parents, and I'll be back until the breakup for 3rd grade at my school.

I might miss being with my school friends. But I know, we'll be apart in a minute. Because everything is definitely setting their goals after graduation. So did I, I chose to go home, and I wanted to talk about my continuation after my graduation.

That night I met with my parents. I started the conversation first...

"Dad, Mom, I'll soon be receiving my graduation, I want to continue my education".

"You're definitely going to college, son, but we both as parents don't know where you're going to go" (My mother said ).

"If I may choose for myself, I want to go to college in the poor".

"Why do you want to go to college there, we don't have any family there" (My mom said).

"Tami's going to college there, and I want to be there, too. Because we both promised we'd go to college together in the middle".

"If you want to go to college, I only allow you the furthest, only in Mataram. If you could just go to college here. Let's not get far with you, son. Dad's worried about letting you go far away on your own".

"I don't want to go to college here, and I don't want to go to college in Mataram either". (I have my own reasons why I don't want to be in Mataram city, because I once promised with Kak Richy to go to college together in that city).

"What help me mom!!, persuade dad to let him go to college in poor. I know I'm so close to Tami, I want to be with my friend. Then Putry my best friend will go to college in poor as well" (Saying my mother ).

"Mother also doesn't let you go to college far away, son. You've never been far away, so I'd be worried if you went to college far away".

"Stay there's Tami and there's definitely a lot of her friends going to college there too".

"You want you to stay there, but you can see your parents are not calm and worried about you there. You go to college here!!" (My mother's voice ).

"I don't want to go to college here. Rather than going to college here, I would rather go to college in Mataram. But I just want to take the test at the university that I want, if I don't pass the test. So I chose not to go to college. Because there's only one community I want in Mataram".

"As far as you. As long as you do not regret it later on because you only register in one place" (My mother's voice ).

"Yes yaaaa" (Sahutku while putting on a pouty face ).

My phone rang cring - cring....

I tried to sneak in on my phone. I did not dare to pick up the phone from Brother Diki, I was afraid my father heard my conversation. If he finds out I'm talking to someone, things get more complicated. I could be asked to go to college here. In order to avoid misunderstanding, I informed Kak Diki by sending him an SMS. The SMS I sent failed, I forgot that my pulse ran out. Brother Diki kept calling me, I didn't respond to calls from him. And then he kept calling me, and I finally got the courage to pick up the phone from him outside the house.

"Sorry I can't talk to my sister for long, because I'm at home. I was afraid my parents would hear me talking to a man. If my parents ask me who I'm talking to, there's no way I'm telling a girl friend. If I say my boyfriend, my mom knows any boyfriend who is close to me. If so, I turn off the phone, brother"

Kak Diki began to show his true attitude, he started to cool to me. He sent me an SMS....

"You're an adult, why should you be afraid the hell you talk to me. We also do not speak strangely - strangely".

I touched on how to reply to the SMS, because I myself do not have a pulse. ahhh stupid, besides I do not really like it, so why am I afraid if he is angry, I thought.

But after I thought - thought, if I felt stupid to him. I am the same as someone who has no feelings let alone respect others. That's not my nature. But how else, I myself do not have a pulse to reply to SMS from him.