MARRIED

See You Later

One year later ....

"Jul, we've been in a loving relationship for more than a year, I want to propose to you immediately" Irfan said holding Julia's hand as they ate dinner together at a cafe.

After returning home from work, Irfan invited Julia to dinner together. They do this often.

Julia just fell silent, looking down to take her eyes off Irfan's eyes. Confused what would answer. His heart is still worried, it turns out that a year is not enough to make Julia steady to accept Irfan to be his life companion.

"Jul, why haven't you answered? I have been waiting for you for a long time. Do you just want us to date without a bond? That what you want?" tanya Irfan presses Julia.

"It's not .. It's not like that!" saut Julia fast.

"Then what then? We love each other, right?!"

"Yes, I love you. But Arka .... " Julie was worried about what she was going to say.

"Do you want to say that Arka doesn't love me?! Jul, I really love Arka," said Irfan quickly.

"But Fan, you can feel for yourself that Arka is not comfortable if you are with you. Even though she can't say it yet but I feel that Arka hasn't been able to accept you," Julia said at last to reveal what's been stuck in her heart.

"Jul, I love Arka so much."

"I know, Fan. But just saying it is not enough. Is not love without works a waste?!" said Julia ventured to say everything to Irfan. Because this is how he felt.

Irfan often comes to Julia's house, but what Julia feels Irfan just wants to meet her. Even if Irfan wants to invite Julia to eat outside, sometimes Julia also wants to invite Arka but Irfan often forbid it by saying various reasons. Arka looks tired, sleepy or a restaurant that will go far enough.

"Julia, then what should I do? I've played with Arka a lot but it's Arka who doesn't seem to like me." Irfan said narrowing his eyes, he started to dislike this topic.

"It was a child, he could feel if the person with him was sincere or not. Sorry, I didn't say you were insincere. But .. ah, I don't know, Fan. Never mind, we've got this discussion. I'm going home, it's late. Kasian Arka from morning I've been staying at work." Julia stood up and stepped out of the cafe.

While Irfan pays the bill first and then chases Julia.

"Jul!" shout Irfan.

Julia didn't mind Irfan's call, she was ordering a taxi online.

"Jul! Tell me, is this all because of Ben?!" Irfan pulled on Julia's arm as he said so, the jealousy in his chest came back.

"Irfan, none of this has anything to do with Ben. You know that Ben always avoids meeting you even with me. He just came to pick up Arka and he took her to his house" Julia explained.

Ben kept his promise. He always avoids meeting Julia and Irfan. Usually Ben comes in the afternoon on weekends just to bring Arka to play at his house. After a few hours, Ben returned to take Arka home.

When Arka's nanny returns home, Ben is the one who keeps Arka alternating with Mama during Arka left Julia to work. Because now Ben has his own business, so he is easier to manage his time.

"Jul, are you comparing what Ben did to Arka to me?" irfan looked into Julia's eyes.

"To be honest yes. I don't see why you're reluctant to spend time with Arka. All I feel is that you just want to be with me. I am a package with Arka. If you love me, you must love my son."

"Jul, how many times have I told you that I love Arka too!" Irfan started to raise the volume of his voice.

"Irfan, we better not meet first. We are each self-introjection. Have I been sure to accept your proposal. Also are you sure you love me and my son" Julia said at last. He was tired of arguing like this. He was tired of working all day and he also had to pay attention to his son with the rest of the time he had.

Julia had no more strength if she had to fight with Irfan. He's tired. With a giant step, Julia entered the online taxi she ordered earlier. While Irfan stood looking at Julia's departure.

Arriving home, Julia devotes all her attention to Arka. After tired of playing, Arka also sleeps. Julia looked at her sleeping child. Her face was calm but adorable. Kissed Arka's cheek with love.

Suddenly his heart rippled with pain, he remembered Karel. Her husband was calm in nature. But if you look at Arka like this, Julia misses the figure of Karel, who will surely love Arka wholeheartedly.

Julia sat leaning against the bed, closing her eyes. He tried to calmly think about his relationship with Irfan.

Love ... may now mean something very different in his mind. For him love is not just love, but comfort. And now also have to think of his son, he is not alone, but alone with Arka.

"Karel .. I miss you," said Julia. At this moment he somehow wanted only Karel who was beside him. He doesn't want anyone else. For her there was no one who could accept her other than Karel.

I can't accept Irfan, I'm not sure yet. Irfan has not been able to give a comfortable love in my heart. Inner Julia in the heart.

***

Nearly two weeks have passed. There was no communication with Irfan. However, Julia enjoys the time to re-reflect on her relationship with Irfan.

But the more days, Julia even more comfortable on her own. He did not feel burdened by the demands to always keep Irfan's feelings. During this time Julia always keep Irfan not jealous, trying to get Arka closer to Irfan, also always trying to fulfill all Irfan requests. Be it for dinner or go for a walk together with Irfan.

More and more days, Julia feels comfort if she alone. He is not confused with Irfan or Ben. Moreover, now Ben has changed very much. He never sued Julia. Ben just wants to spend his time with Arka. Sometimes Julia is very grateful for the presence of Ben on the side of Arka, being a replacement for the father figure that Arka does not have.

***

"Jul, have you been waiting?" Irfan came in with his trademark smile greeting, then sat down next to Julia.

The city park is comfortable to spend time with family, especially if the afternoon is like today. The park is not very crowded, so Irfan and Julia decided to meet here.

"Not too long ago" said Julia returned Irfan's smile.

Long pauses, Julia and Irfan feel like strangers. Not meeting for some time with the problem that has not been completed, making both confused about where to start.

"Jul, I can't make small talk. Let's just talk about our pending problems." Irfan finally opened the conversation.

"Yes, Fan."

"just that? Then what's your answer? Did you accept my proposal?" ask Irfan directly.

"Sorry, Fan. But I'm not sure yet. What if we knew each other better? Maybe a year or two, then I can convince myself" said Julia calm down. He was ready for whatever happened. Better to be sad now than later.

"You want more time? Then suppose after two years you are not sure, then you will ask for more time? How long do I have to wait?!" Irfan could not understand what Julia said.

"Then, maybe you should put in more effort, Fan. Please convince me!" said Julia looking into Irfan's eyes.

Irfan shook his head. He has also thought about various points of view about his relationship with Julia. He has tried and sacrificed a lot. But he can't wait anymore.

"Jul, I've thought about it too. I can't wait for you anymore. If you don't accept my proposal now, we'd better split up" Irfan looked into Julia's eyes. There was a sad look but also hope there.

Julia closed her eyes, she knew this was the worst possibility. But when he heard it himself, why did he still feel the pain in his heart?

"Are you sure, Fan?"

"My answer would be like that if you reject my proposal, I can't wait anymore." Irfan was firm with his stance.

Sighing deeply, Julia looked into Irfan's eyes. "Sorry, I haven't been able to accept your proposal. Irfan, maybe we're not a match."

Julia held back with all her tears that were about to spill on her cheeks.

"Alright, Jul. Maybe we weren't meant to be together. I gave up waiting for you, Jul." Irfan bowed holding the sadness in his heart.

The cool breeze of the afternoon felt on his body, flying his strands of hair. Julia felt a pain in the heart, but this is what had to happen.

He was silent, Irfan was silent, busy with his own thoughts.

Long ago Irfan finally took a white envelope and gave it to Julia.

"Jul, this is Karel's last day for you. Karel said this letter should be given when you get married, but I think Karel's estimation was wrong. Karel thought you were going to marry me. But it turns out we're not fools. I give it to you now, open it when you get married. Maybe I won't come to your wedding later" Irfan said, handing Julia a white envelope.

Julia sadly stared at the envelope, then carefully inserted it into the bag.

"Thank you very much, Irfan. I will always keep memories of our good times" Julia said withholding her tears.

"Thank you too, Jul. I will always remember you in my heart as a very special person. Don't say goodbye, because we don't know what's going to happen. Who knows we will be a match," said Irfan held back his sadness that felt stifling.

"Then, I'll see you later, Irfan. My best friend" Julia looked at Irfan with tears beginning to flow down her cheeks.

Irfan's hand was about to wipe away the tears, but he broke his intention. Irfan strengthens the heart.

"See you later, Julia."

Irfan walks over leaving Julia still sitting in her place. Not wanting to look again, because he might cancel his decision. Irfan let out a sigh before opening his car door and slowly, he left the city park and Julia, a woman who was special to him.

Julia stared blankly at the darkening sky. The park began to be quiet, not many visitors who still survive because the day went night.

Closing her eyes, Julia strengthened her heart. Hopefully this is the best decision for him and Irfan. It is better to feel sad now than to have to live something he himself is unsure of.

Julia realized, she was now not looking for a tempestuous love. But he was looking for a father figure for his son. If he has not found it, it is better that he lives alone with his beloved son, Arka.

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