LOVE THE SINNER GIRL

HARU

Jenny stood in the middle of the bedroom Lucas had prepared for her. After days of being hospitalized, Lucas decides to take Jenny to his newly purchased Home. She thought Jenny's apartment would only make Jenny even more depressed.

Jenny doesn't want to see Lucas' recommended psychiatrist. Instead, he insisted that he would see a different psychiatrist. Someone he chose himself. Fearing that Jenny would be upset, Lucas agreed.

"Rania has your things with her. It's in that big bag. The closet is empty, you can arrange your things according to your wishes. I can ask Rania to help you if you want, let me know. For now, please take a break, or you can take a shower if you want. I'll cook dinner, just tell me if you want anything. I'm gonna take a shower for a second. I'll be right back."

Jenny did not respond. He simply walked towards the bed and sat there, staring at the window overlooking the city. Lucas is worried but he knows, there's nothing he can do but support Jenny, look after her, and wait until she meets the doctor.

Lucas exits Jenny's room before calling Rania's number. Ruby wants to meet her to talk about her sister Yoona. And she asks Rania to look after Jenny while she's away. Although Jenny did not complain at all, she was more worried about Jenny's silence.

After taking a shower, as soon as possible, she checked her phone to read Rania's reply. Rania just said that she was on her way but would go to an ice cream shop to buy ice cream for Jenny. With a smile, Lucas walked into Jenny's room.

Tapping a few times, she turned the knob and was thankful Jenny didn't lock it. As he went inside, he found an empty bed. He felt as if someone was punching his chest when he turned to the room where he had placed Jenny's luggage, only to find nothing.

In her shock, as she did not expect Jenny to leave, her hands started to tremble as she pressed on Rania's number. But while doing so, he saw the paper on the pillow.

Don't worry, I'll be fine. It's promise.  Thanks for everything, Lucas and I are really sorry. Please forgive me for always making you troubled.Thank you for always loving me.All I want is for you to be happy. Please don't look for me.

Loved you.

With Jenny's letter in her hand, she rushes out, hoping Jenny is still around her house, or nearby. But, apparently there is nothing.

...****************...

Jenny sat on the wooden sofa inside the dimly lit office. His eyes wandered in a familiar room. That hasn't changed since the last time he was there.

He still remembered accompanying his father at that place. Part of his father's wealth was given away at the orphanage. He knew how close the institution was in his father's heart. Makes it more special to him. Being there brought back all the wonderful memories he had with his father. Charity work they do together. See the happiness on the faces of children. Seeing his father enjoying every second of being there. Somehow painted a small smile back on his face.

"Jenny?"

Jenny's eyes were pointing at the door. An old woman walked in, looking surprised to see someone she hadn't seen in years.

Jenny did not say a word. He just looked into the woman's eyes, tears streaming down. The woman slowly walked towards him, recognizing in Jenny's eyes that something was wrong. As the woman held Jenny's hand, they sat back down. Her eyes were fixed on Jenny's heavily bandaged wrist, and Jenny's tears began to fall.

"I'm p-pregnant," Jenny stuttered as she spoke. The lump in his throat started to become more painful. But the pain in his heart was more than that. And the next words almost came out as a whisper. "It's not what I expected, the baby's father doesn't know, and he's gone."

The woman listened to what Jenny had to say. No judgment, no questions, just pure comfort. The woman spread her arms and immediately, Jenny leaned her face on the woman's shoulder as she began to cry. He could feel the woman's gentle touch, rubbing her back. "I know it's heavy right now but it'll be fine soon."

Jenny tried to calm herself down. He could not look directly into the woman's eyes. He wasn't sure why he decided to come there from all over the place but for him, it was the only place Lucas didn't know. It was the only place where he could not be found. A quiet place where no one recognized him. Just a place surrounded by happy kids. "I'm very sorry Mrs Kim, but can I stay here for a while? I can't think of any other place to go. I want to calm down for a moment. I want to think about my future without everyone seeing me destroyed or commit suicide. I've been a burden to them for a long time and I think it's very selfish of me. I want them to focus on their lives, turn their attention to more important things, and stop worrying about me, I just want them to be happy."

"I understand. You don't have to explain yourself. It's okay to focus on yourself. Especially now that you're pregnant, it's important that you relax and take care of yourself."

Madam Kim was shocked to hear Jenny's intentions. But he only nodded as his hands tightened around Jenny's hands. He declined to comment, suggest anything, or give advice. She knew, in Jenny's little world, she wouldn't listen. Or perhaps, he would listen but would never understand. Or worst of all, I think everything is wrong.

But deep down, she knew that Jenny was coming in the right place. She knew that Jenny would learn something by staying there, and she hoped that Jenny would change her mind. For now, she's happy Jenny chose to keep the baby.

...****************...

8 months later

"I wish I could play with your baby. But my new parents will pick me up tomorrow." The little girl placed her tiny hand on Jenny's stomach while sitting on her lap. "I'm sure she'll be pretty because you're really pretty."

Jenny smiled. The little girl had become very close to him ever since he arrived at the orphanage a few months ago. She used to ignore the girl because she didn't want anyone to talk to her but the girl had a very charming way of attracting her attention. And one day, he realized that he loved her very much. And they grow close.

"You like your new parents?" Jenny asked while looking at the girl's face. The girl nodded and grinned, "Yes. They're both very good to me. And after a month, they'll take me to London to live there."

Jenny straightened the girl's hair and cupped her face, "Please be a good girl, okay? Grow up well. I will miss you."

The little girl leaned her head against Jenny's chest. "Madam Kim told me that parents usually put a baby's head on their mother's chest so they can listen to their heartbeat. He said it was like music in a baby's ear. Your baby is so lucky that she can hear your heartbeat right now. Maybe he's humming in your stomach."

The girl's words gave Jenny unimaginable pain. He did not even dare to name the baby because he had already decided to leave the baby for adoption. He feels guilty for doing so. Or even to think about it.

" Sister Jenny, have you decided on the name of the baby? When I'm in London, I'll write him a letter."

The little girl's innocent eyes locked onto Jenny's. His smile was full of hope. He doesn't know what to say. He felt ashamed even to look into his eyes. And those moments made him even more devastated.

Jenny's thoughts about the little girl were interrupted when she heard the loud cries of a newborn child. Madam Kim held her hand and her gaze instantly turned to her. His heart started beating faster as the baby's cries grew louder.

"They're outside and waiting. I just want you to know that baby girl is healthy." Mrs Kim's words were gentle and reassuring. Jenny could feel her tears running down her temple. He wanted to cry but he was tired. The process of giving birth and the thought of sending her baby to be adopted left her emotionally and physically exhausted. When the baby stops crying, all he can hear is his heartbeat. And she tightened her hands around Mrs Kim.

"Wait a minute. I. want to hug her," whispered Jenny as if in a hurry. Madam Kim smiled as she saw a glimmer of hope. She never advised Jenny to carry her baby, as Jenny asked her to give her baby once she gave birth to her. But now that Jenny asks to hold her baby, it makes Mrs Kim hopeful.

As soon as the baby was laid on his chest, the baby moved and opened his eyes. And soon after, the baby seemed comfortable in his arms. Jenny started crying. Kissing her baby's forehead while gently hugging the little girl sleeping on her chest. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Jenny?" Mrs Kim called, gesturing that the baby should leave.

Jenny looked at the baby's calm face. He didn't know why, but the baby's face was very similar to the baby's father. He hesitated. He can't let go. And finally, Jenny shook her head, "No. I'll take care of him. I'm sorry Mrs Kim, but I'll take care of my daughter."

Haru's. I'll take care of my daughter Haru