IN THE CAGE

22. EMOTIONAL OUTBURSTS

...ACE pov's...

...---...

When I got home, I had a falling out with Uncle Jack who seemed to have just come out of Margot's room. From Uncle Jack's appearance which was still the same as this morning, I guess he was already here after coming home from the hospital. The three bodyguards Uncle Jack was following stopped when Uncle Jack approached me.

"Where are you from?" ask uncle Jack. The stress accumulated on uncle's head was clearly visible in his always gloomy expression. I wouldn't be surprised if at any time uncle followed in Margot's footsteps and wore all-black clothes. They are both stressed.

"I met Indira" I said in a bored voice. "Have you met Margot?"

"I told him about Fabian. Margot's devastated right now."

"Well, at least the funeral clothes she wears will come in handy." I made a joke.

"Ace!"

I took a breath. What harm is it? Margot always wears mourning clothes, right? At least with Fabian's death, Margot's mourning outfit will fit in the moment.

"You look pretty calm about this, Ace. Is it because this situation is not important to you, you become apathetic. The death of your parents must not be a big thing in your eyes either."

"What I'm thinking won't change the fact that Fabian or my parents are dead, uncle. Unlike you, I keep myself sane so as not to be immersed in blind ambition." Uncle always knows how to provoke my emotions. This one guy, he really makes me itch to want to hit him.

"Your alignment looks more like a waiver, Ace. I hope you're not too preoccupied with your own world because after all." Uncle Ace glanced at the box of macarons I brought. I asked Carcel to buy it at the cafe, a little present for Fawn.

"I hope you don't forget, as long as you play and have fun out there, a mess can happen to Margot at any time. Just like old times, when you're engrossed in your own world and your parents end up finding death, I hope your selfishness won't happen a second time."

Uncle's words are like a piece of paper tearing my chest. My lips tightened, holding every swipe I was ready to throw on his face. The blood in my head was like hot lava, boiling and ready to spill.

"You seem pretty attached to your new pet. Buy him food on time like this, you gotta be careful Ace. Attachment is also a form of weakness."

"I know." I clasped tightly onto the plastic box I was carrying, and as Uncle Jack passed from before me, I slammed the box onto the floor. Stepping on that box of macarons with passionate emotions.

Motherfucker! Motherfucker! These fools treated me like I was an amateur who would forget what my goal was just because I was playing around a little bit! Do they think I'm a robot that can't have fun?! I'm a human too, damn it! What you expect is too big of me!

"If he is so great he should be in my position right now!!! Bastard, dammit!!! Do you think I'm a toy!!! What do you know about me, motherfucker!!!"

Find the killer, find the killer! Do they think finding that bastard is as easy as opening under my bed and tada...!!!

Do they think I'm not trying hard!

My heart is going to explode. Even if I die today, do any of them care???

"Boss Ace," Carcel approached me from behind. His calm voice faintly reached my ears. "Boss Ace, calm down a little."

"Do you think I can calm down after what he said?" I unconsciously shouted. "I am the head of this family, and he still doesn't appreciate me! Does he think I'm just a pawn he can move wherever he wants!!!"

"Good afternoon, Ace's boss." Haru greeted me, but without even bothering to press her, I went into the room and slammed the door hard. My emotions have not subsided and the heat in my chest is incredible.

Tired of filling my head again, I sauntered towards my desk and threw a powerful kick there. Books, lamp accessories, learning equipment and even the monitors on display there jump on the floor and cause fanfare. I saw a pen rolling on my leg and gave a powerful kick there. Wreaked out my abundant emotions and energy as a result of the skyrocketing emotions.

I was about to go on a rampage again when I finally saw Fawn standing by my bed, hands hugging pillows and eyes widening. From her expression filled with shock, my actions just now must have terrified her greatly.

"What are you noticing?" I looked at him sharply, my voice full of hostility. Back then, I was so covered by the flames of anger that the world looked like my enemy. Be it Carcel or Fawn, I treated them with cruelty.

"Are you happy now?" I approached Fawn, looking for trouble at her to release the aggravating pressure on my chest. "You must be really happy when you know I'm having a problem, right? You and all of you are bastards!!! Fuck!!!"

I shouted at Fawn who was still silent with her shoulders shaking. The fear in her eyes reminded me of the day we met. He looked at me like a demon that was going to devour him into hell. I was a monster in the eyes of all of them, I-no-one had ever seen me as me!

"What's going on?" Fawn's vibrating voice greeted my ears. His eyes looked at me doubtfully. "W-are you okay?"

"Do I look okay in your eyes?" I've been on the verge of destruction, damn it. I'm gonna lose myself in all this mess. I don't know anymore.

"It's all my fault!"

If I don't give priority to my ideals, if I don't leave home to pursue the path I want, the murder won't happen. Father and I will work together to build Diamond to the top of the world. I'm going to go with you and realize everything that's wrong. I could save her from a mess I never knew, or maybe, I could die with her.

It's better than living and being chased by a ghost called guilt!

"I've been trying so hard, you know!" I fell on the floor and leaned on the lip of the bed. Fawn held my arm and as I sat down, she sat down beside me.

"I just want them to leave me alone. I don't want to live here! I want to go!" I go back to whining, I want to spill my emotions onto whoever it is.

"I just want Margot to be happy, but I don't know anymore. All this.., I thought I'd die before I could fix this family."

I thought, when I spilled out all the fatigue that was clogging my heart, I would feel a tremendous relief. But, when I said it all, as I lamented over all the suffering that broke my heart, I increasingly felt a strong grip on my chest. The more I realized I was so far from where I wanted to be.

The happiness I crave is like a mirage.

I glanced at Fawn who was sitting beside me without a sound. Fawn said nothing. He listened to me but at one time, did not interrupt me. The incoming calm and the atmospheric silence between us made the pain in my heart slowly fade into drowsiness.

I want to sleep forever.

I am tired of endless expectations.

I closed my eyes and warm liquid flowed down my cheeks right then and there. It was only before I actually went to dreamland that I heard Fawn's voice driving me away.

"Sleep, everything will be fine once you wake up."

...---...