Dollar Girl

Chapter 13 Trauma of a father

"Gemericik water increasingly swift it is able to pin the void into anxiety, my regret that drifted up to the trenches and rivers in your life maybe now I can say the word 'Good night' right in your ear and 'Good morning' right when you open your eyes. But no! whether you exist or not, my world is still cruel to the game that plays in my destiny."

Excerpted from Ratna Mangalih's personal archive.

* * *

Surya arrived quite quickly when Ratna's eyes were still tight, her body was reluctant to let go of the warm bed because the air outside was still cold. Especially when he realized if he woke up then he had to go to school, a place where the problem makes his head dizzy.

'Why... can I think Amus wrote the letter? just because I like her, doesn't mean she likes me too' her inner self feels the void in the morning.

Hhhhhhhh

"Here it is, it is better that we be friends so that we can continue together without awkward. Jaya is also quite good, I should be able to be right with her" he muttered while getting out of a comfortable bed.

"Oh, where are you going so early?" tanyanya when she saw Sapardi was dressed neatly and prepared her furniture bag.

"Job at Jimy's family's restaurant isn't done yet, so I'm going to go there. Tonight I'll be home late so you better eat with Jimy again" he said.

"Um. okay"

"Don't forget to have breakfast before you go to school, Dad, go first"

"Well be careful on the road" Ratna looked at her father's missing back from behind the door.

Since his arrival to the house he rarely chatted with his father, but he remembered his father's childhood so cheerful and always invited him to play together. I don't know what happened to him that turned into a quiet man, even in his 40s Sapardi looks half a century old.

This is quite disturbing, even more disturbing than his own love problems. As a result he often daydreams and does not focus on the lessons.

"Master, what do you think happened to my father?" ask Ratna at empty hours.

"It's frustrating, what else?"

"You mean?"

"Living dead by a loved one is not an easy thing to deal with"

"Then what should I do?"

"Consolve him, give him something that will make him smile again and get excited" Jimy suggested.

Ratna immediately pondered Jimy's words, thinking hard about what she should do until her childhood memories gave her a pretty good idea.

Teng Teng Teng Teng

The hour of rest finally arrived as well, the students scattered out of the classroom with starving stomachs. As usual, Ratna's gang went to the cafeteria together and ordered their favorite food, but did not expect someone to come along.

"Tumben you go to the cafeteria, usually you always tell your men, right?" ardi looked at the wonder.

"Once in a while I also want to go to the cafeteria" Jaya replied half nervously.

"Do you want to order something?" ask Ratna.

"Can, thank you" Jaya replied quickly with joy.

Ratna immediately left the table while the others were still staring in wonder at Jaya, making her even more bowed in shame with a stifled smile.

"I'm done, let's go!" take Jimy after a few quick mouthfuls that finish his meal with no leftovers.

"Ready! go Jay!" bring Ardi.

"You guys go first, my food's not over yet"

"We'll go first."

Although it was hard to rise Amus stood up and tried to ignore the intentions of Jaya who had been discovered by him, he said, he could only hope that Ratna would not respond to him even if it was foolish hope because she knew they had been in a relationship.

"Um... Is your father okay?" jaya asked as they were only two.

"Huh? oh yes, he is fine, maybe" replied Ratna hesitated because this morning clearly Sapardi looks exhausted.

"It seems you're still worried about him"

"He always works hard without thinking about his health, even tonight he will also be home late"

"So yeah, he must be a great dad in your eyes"

"Not only great, she was my first love" Ratna recalled the frown on her father's face as she laughed.

Jaya could not comment again after hearing the remark, obviously because she understood the position of the girl who could not be far from her father.

"Sorry, I want to go back to class" said Ratna, who felt bad for her heart.

"Um yes, alright" Jaya replied.

"Hi" she said with a shy face.

"Hi.. too" replied Ratna who was quite awkward because in the break hours earlier they had just met.

"Can I take you home?" ask Jaya.

"Oh me. There's business so don't go straight home"

"That's how it is" said Jaya clearly felt disappointed.

"I'm sorry, I'm leaving first" Ratna said.

So far Jaya has shown an attitude of concern, very normal for lovers. But somehow Ratna felt uncomfortable about it, she did not even understand why Jaya seemed to want to meet him even though tomorrow they could meet again.

By continuing in the shadow of Jaya's attitude without feeling now he has arrived at a pharmacy that sells herbal medicine as well, he bought a pack of herbal tea and coconut oil.

That was all he needed for now, with a smiley face he walked home.

"Oi Where have you been?" asked Ardi who was sitting outside his house.

"I went to buy tea and coconut oil first"

"I saw that you met Jaya back at school, what are you talking about?" ask Ardi curiously.

Indeed, when the bell rang Ratna looked quickly packed and ran out of class, of course it invited question marks for her three best friends. When they came out they saw Ratna and Jaya were talking after that Ratna left first.

"Lately I've seen him see you a lot, what's really going on between you?" ask again.

'What has been lately? he just approached me today' Ratna's inner straightened that speech.

"It's none of your business" Ratna said as she passed.

"Based on the dollar girl, you don't even have a good person" Ardi muttered staring at the departure.

According to her father Ratna's orders to have dinner at Jimy's house again, this time not only Ardi who came along but Amus also joined in eating together. In accordance with their routine Jimy and Ardi play PS after eating while Ratna chose to go home to wait for her father.

Exactly at eleven o'clock at night when Ratna was unable to resist sleepiness Sapardi came home and greeted Ratna right at the door.

"You haven't slept? it's late" Sapardi said, shocked to see his daughter still awake.

"I was waiting for you to come home, let me bring you my bag" he replied, taking the bag in Sapardi's hand.

The small action apparently made Sapardi quite moved, his tired body suddenly powered back. Not only that, after cleaning herself, Ratna had prepared herbal tea for her and a bucket of warm water to soak her feet.

"Dad sit here, soak your feet so that your blood circulation becomes smooth. Let me massage my father's shoulders as well" Ratna said.

"Why do you bother? you don't have to do this" Sapardi said, trying to cover up the joy of his heart.

"Father needs all this, after working hard, of course, this is the best for health. Come on, sit down!" his orders.

Finally Sapardi said, while occasionally sipping hot tea he enjoyed every massage given Ratna on his shoulder.

"I use coconut oil, doesn't it smell good? when I was a child I thought my mother made a cake it turned out she was on her feet" Ratna said nostalgically.

"Hehe daddy remember! you even whined while looking for the cake"

"Mother also still uses this oil to massage me"

"really? he really likes the smell."

Both the minds of the father and son soared on the memories of their good times, despite living only moderately but Ratna never lacked affection and attention. That's why he was confused why his parents divorced while he felt fine, now he quite understands that money can indeed be a reason for one's happiness.

"Na. forgive me father" Sapardi said suddenly.

"Why are you sorry?"

"Dad can't make you and your mother happy, every time you see you cleaning up this house or even when you just wake up I remember the time where your mother took you away. I promise you from now on I'll work even harder to make you happy, I'll meet all your needs."

Ratna stopped her seeping hand, now he already knows that behind his father's quiet attitude apparently not only because he was left by his wife but also traumatized because he was left behind only because he was poor.

"I don't need that!"

"What?" asked Sapardi who was shocked to hear his daughter's answer.

"It is not why we live simply, eat potluck or sleep on a mat. As long as I live with my mother I always wear nice clean clothes, but I never feel happy. I can eat well but I never have a taste for food, my bed is warm and soft but I can't sleep well. All because I was required to obey my half-brother, people said I was lucky to have a bright future but I was never happy. And you should also know that you are never happy after you leave you. One mistake I've made is believing that money can make me happy, which is why I told my mom to go home and live with my dad because even if my life was lacking I could be happy"

"Ratna." called Sapardi powerless to hold back his tears.

"From now on don't push yourself anymore, you've worked hard" Ratna said with a smile full of sincerity.