LOVE SONGS OF LOLOBATA

MOVE AWAY

Some time after Baba was buried, the state of our village was no longer peaceful. The iron monsters came flattening the forest area near our fields. Noise. The land that was previously a wilderness in an instant turned into a vast expanse of red land where the activity of the iron monsters

scary shape. We are helpless. Some villagers who still want peace to live with nature as in previous days go away into the wilderness which is quite far from our village. While some others are willing to be moved to new villages established specifically for the reallocation of residents who previously managed land that entered the mine concession area. Mama who at that time had just lost my youngest brother who was born prematurely decided to move to the newly established village.

“Follow with mom, Fifa.” invite mama with a face of sand.

I actually did not until my heart saw my mother's face but my head shook with certainty obey my heart.

“Tak comfortable again stay here.”

It's uncomfortable, but I want to stay here with my wonderful childhood memories. I still want to be here guarding the baba's grave and living my day in the baba house. I love the shack and the mushola too much

our small. Also in the parrot that often perch on the old walnut tree next to the mushola. I don't want to lose what's been making me happy. I even fought him to the death.

“This land does not belong to us, Fifa.” continued mama with a heavy voice like there is a bulkhead stuck in the throat.

“Fifa know. The earth belongs to God. Everything on this earth belongs to God. Fifa is aware that only a passenger stay as long as Fifa lives.” answered me lightly.

“Quickly or later they will displace this house.”

“No will.”

“Don't be stubborn, Fifa. We don't have any evidence that shows ownership of that land. In a new place the government will grant us a certificate of land ownership. With the letter, nothing else can interfere. God willing, our lives will be better. Besides, the atmosphere here will not be as comfortable as before. Better we move to a comfortable place to stay and farm.”

I'm keeping quiet. No longer want to argue mama, but still insist on my own wishes.

Mom persuaded me to move into her new home. I'm not flinching. My determination makes my mother sad. Mama thought it was my decision to stay in the hut because she disagreed with her decision to marry the village head. Though not so. I'm sure mom lost her baba figure a lot. The sense of loss may be much greater than the sense of loss I feel. I often find my mother pensive and watering in her room.

I understand mama helplessly refused the proposal of the village head. There's no other choice. Mama needs protection and the village head is the most appropriate person to be used as a place to lean after baba is gone. I understand that decision. As most women thought, it was too dangerous for the three of us to stay in the huts on the riverbank and in the wilderness without a male figure. Especially with the presence of giant monsters with long iron hands that at all times move to dredge earth and stone in the land that has been opened. While other large monsters transport land and stone to a large building that is no less scary. They're so scary. His voice was ear-shattering, not as beautiful as the bird song we used to hear every morning.

“You don't get me wrong, Fifa. Mama married the father of the head of the village not because she did not love baba.” Once again my mother said that sentence with teary eyes.

Without having to split his chest, I could already feel how mama's mood was. Look at his eyes that I can talk. Mom still loves baba. I never doubted that.

Curse both mama's hands and hold them tightly, “Fifa knows. Fifa believes the decision to marry the village head father is the best decision for mama.” I smiled confidently while hoping that my mother would understand my wishes as much as I appreciated her decision.

“Then what makes you not want to move?”

“My decision not to move was not because I did not agree with my mother's marriage. I told you, the village chief is a good man. He can definitely take care of us.” I actually have tried many times to convince my mother that this decision has nothing to do with her marriage to the father of the village head. But my mom still looks bad.

Mama was still looking at me with eyes filled with pleading. “Mama can't bear to let you stay alone here.”

Such is the love and tenderness of the mother's heart, it is impossible to leave her daughter alone. I know he must be very worried about me. But I tried to transfer confidence through a confident smile, “Mama just calm down. Fifa will be fine. There is no disaster without God's permission and will. Wherever we are as long as we cling to our convictions, God will surely protect us. After all, no one would dare to disturb the village head child. If you are afraid, you can help Fifa with prayers to always be healthy and safe here. The new village is not too far from here. Fifa will often visit my mom's new house so that I'm sure Fifa is okay. Believe, Ma! Fifa is already

mature and can take care of themselves. Fifa can stay alone.”

Of course Mama can't change my mind and my heart. I am a stone head. Since birth it has been a stone head. I am confident that I can live independently even though I am a woman. With a heavy heart, my mother finally gave up. I don't really want to burden her mind, but I need to prove that I'm independent and can have my own happiness.

There are many dilemmas that haunt my mind. I understand that very well. The fact is being a widow is not an easy thing for a woman as beautiful as a mother. Since Baba died, many men have come to flirt and ask her to be a wife. Sometimes their attitude makes us feel bad. I am happy, by deciding to marry the father of the head of the village no one else dares to disturb my mother or us, her daughters. That one factor might also be the reason no one dared to bother me. Security from the village head father who is also my stepfather in the end makes mama want to try to let me live alone in the hut relic baba.

My mother never lost her beauty despite having given birth to several children. Like a vampire, mama can't age with time that's been spinning for so long. Mama married Baba in early teens. He is kembang kampung. In addition to baba, many men like it and compete hard to get it. It is said that my mother is still a descendant of the Lingon tribe who has physical characteristics like the Caucasoid race. Curly hair, white skin, sharp nose and retina eyes grayish. The parasite is slightly different from most villagers who are tanned and curly-haired. Mama's beauty has become more radiant since she married Baba. It was definitely because the baba gave him a lot of love and taught him to live clean. Baba taught us to bathe in the river by using leaves from vines like betel which when rubbed into the skin produces a fine foam like soap. The efficacy of natural soap that makes our skin bright, healthy and look brighter than the skin of other villagers.

Mama likes to clean herself and regularly stretch her body with turmeric and rice herbs grown by baba in the garden behind our house. Mom also covered her face with honey. Other than the story about the Lingon tribe, it was the custom that I believed made my mama look always beautiful. But beauty has both positive and negative consequences. All the consequences are inevitably a part of life that must be accepted by mama.

I'm not willing to move. Nothing can change my mind except my own initiative. Whatever happens I want to stay in the baba's hut.