LOVE SONGS OF LOLOBATA

HELIOPHoBiA

After the dawn prayer, Bray took me to the office of the foundation with the company of Wahyu as a driver. The man painstakingly prepared 2 boxes of milk, biscuits and fruits for my morning breakfast. Although I complained of being bored with the menu, Bray still did it every morning. Sometimes eat. Sometimes not. But I try to always drink the milk it provides, be it canned milk with a bear or milk box with a variety of flavors. There are berry, almond and chocolate flavors. Bray's just mad that I threw out milk. Mubazirs. That's why I try to drink milk even though sometimes I have to close my nose and resist nausea.

"Still quiet, dear." commented Bray when we got to the front of the office.

Yep. It was still too early. Anyone who wants to go to the office early in the morning blind except pregnant women who are afraid of the sun.

I stood watching Bray open the office door and put the things I had brought from home. In addition to the laptop, I also bring a camera, pillow, food, vitamins, and a large teddy bear. Don't ask me why I brought those things. There's no particular reason. Just indulge in the desire that suddenly arises. I don't know exactly what I'm going to do today. Before the sun came up, I had to go to the stag pen to visit my newborn son last week and capture his picture with a camera. The next plan might be to check the reports of Aryati, our administrative staff or take refuge in a tree house located inside the aviary while observing the behavior of the birds inside.

Bray is getting more and more patient with my mood going up and down. I don't know why I always think bad about him. We never communicate with each other by smiling again. The reason may be because I am easily offended often misrepresents his smile. Bray tends to choose silence over getting into fights.

Not just taking me to the foundation office. Bray followed me walking to the back of the office toward the stag pen. Without smiling. Without saying a word.

"Hello, mas Firdaus. Tumben morning is here." doctor Hans greeted with a wide smile that expands.

During that time, Dr. Hans was busy with his assistant preparing nutritious food for his deer. So diligent.

"Yes. Take the young mistress and she said she wanted to see a newborn fawn last week."

Doctor Hans smiled at the answer. While I pout. Piqued. Anyone who is spoiled asks to be escorted to the cage. I didn't tell her to be like her servant's mistress. Bray was the one who was following me. Why am I perceived as evil as if I were treating my husband like a servant.

Doctor Hans pointed to a sleeping deer curled up to protect its young under a thick jackfruit tree.

I rushed to the deer. While Bray continues the conversation with Dr. Hans while watching me from afar.

The fragile-looking little female deer was shocked by my presence. He woke up and watched me. Beware of possible threats to their children. I quietly observed the little deer boys sleeping "crackle". It seems comfortable to protect each other and warm each other. That's how a family is best. Support each other.

Snap. Snap. I take pictures and videos from different angles. Aih funny. I admire my digital camera screenshots.

Glare. The sunlight penetrated my eye lens. I closed my eyes with the back of my hand avoiding the light. Apparently the sun has left the dispute. He showed a look like a reddish-orange ball.

I rubbed my eyes and then looked back ahead. Now the Sun looks like a fireball moving slowly upward. I don't know why I'm afraid a ball of fire is rolling down, and burning my body.

Oh naw. I have to save myself. I hurriedly turned my body around then walked briskly half-running towards the deserted office. I rushed in. I closed the door to be safe and curled up on the sofa and covered myself.

"What's up, honey? Why run scared like that?" Bray opened the door with an anxious face hunting me.

"That ball of fire will burn me."

Bray's confused. Ceringak - swerving to and fro while thinking hard what he meant.

Bray once told me in Java there is a myth about banaspati which is like a fireball. Banaspati is a type of delicate creature that is believed to be happy to suck blood.

It is also said that Banaspati has a terrible form. He walked in an unorthodox manner, as his head became a leg.

Meanwhile, the victim targeted by Banaspati is a newborn baby.

In Javanese culture it is also believed that the figure of banaspati is considered as the bearer of mass death of villagers in the form of dragon-shaped flashes of fire. It is with this message that local people are asked to be vigilant and careful, including more stay at home for a while.

"sun. The sun is like a ball of fire chasing me, Mom."

Bray shakes his head withholding a smile. "I thought you saw a mythical creature called banaspati. Turns out you mean the fireball is the sun."

Doctor Farhana was right, it looks like I have a psychiatric disorder. I need psychiatric help. Could it be that I am having hallucinations, seeing the sun as a ball of fire that will strike me. And no one saw that. The sun the sun. The center of the solar system whose light is daily illuminating the earth. I'm so sad. Bray must be embarrassed. The mother of her future child suffers from mental illness. What's with me? What about my son? Is he gonna be okay?

"Assalamu'alaikum's chat. What happened to Fifa, Firdaus?"

"Wa'alaikumsalam."

Doctor Farhana looked at Bray and I took turns. I'm shy. I decided to hide myself under the covers. I cuddle a large teddy bear with soft fur and a soft body. Why am I like this? What's up with me? Why is my behavior like this? Am I crazy?

"It's okay, Doctor. Fifa is afraid of the sun. I told you not to go to the foundation office, but he insisted. He said he needed to see the fawns and meet a friend."

"Oohs. It's okay, Mas Firdaus. Indeed, there are pregnant women who suddenly become heliophobia or fear of the sun like Fifa. It usually occurs temporarily during the first trimester only. There are also those that continue until the last trimester. But rarely."

I peeked out from under the blanket. Thankful that someone defended. Other women may act strangely out of normal mind control in early pregnancy.

"Fifa needs friends and activities together so as not to feel lonely. He wants to try his normal activities with us. Let's not stress."

"Actually I want to ask him to consult a specialist doctor in Jakarta or in Makassar. But Fifa always refused. I'm afraid our baby is deficient in vitamin D because Fifa doesn't want to see the sun. He's been a little weird lately. Eating difficult. Easy to be angry, sad and offended."

"Fifa is fine, Firdaus. He just needed time to adjust to the hormonal changes in his body that made his mood bad."

Bray nodded and smiled. I sneered for him to stop his efforts to spread charm. Why use a smile with doctor Farhana. He is smarter and sweeter. But she's a man's wife. Bray should just smile for me. She made me this way, because she was pregnant with her child.

"Mas went to work there. Pick up again in the afternoon. No need to come here. We want lunch and dinner together." throw me out while pushing her body out of the room.

Bray smile. He left me after leaving me to the doctor Farhana to be guided. It's really like leaving a Kindergarten child to his teacher.