LOVE SONGS OF LOLOBATA

MISPROPRIATE

The beginning of our wedding trip was so sweet even without the special moment of the honeymoon. Bray is still busy with work and business development plans. I was also busy with my old job of overseeing the financial activities of the plantation and taking care of the bird conservation foundation. Sometimes my hands still had time to wean the remnants of dry pandan into a bag that I planned to wear myself. Exclusive and without being pursued by the target.

Everyday only two in a small house. He's got him again. But the name of the newlyweds is still not bored. We don't say much. The most intense communication is simply reciprocating a smile with a variety of different expressions. Sometimes spontaneously I find a new smile style that attracts more attention.

Bray is not a person who likes crowds, parties or the like. I just found out that actually we both have something in common, which is to like being alone. Bray likes solitude perhaps because he is used to living alone as an only child. Relationships with others are mostly limited to business communication and mere formality. Gather only to meet certain invitations and shut down when it comes to personal matters. That's why he feels at home living in the office of employees who are in an office environment. Even though life in the office environment is fairly static, quiet, and for some people boring because of the lack of entertainment facilities. For those of us who are both closed the most pleasant entertainment is to enjoy the sound of nature in silence.

We always do activities together. This week we are busy on the way to follow the new rhythm of life. Wednesday morning we left for Makassar to finish our respective affairs in the city. After taking the documents in the safe box I stopped by to visit my family. He stayed at the hotel and returned the next day. By Friday afternoon we were ready to fly again to visit my father-in-law in Jakarta. The trip this time is planned and relaxed so it is enough to use public commercial flight transportation economy class. We have both agreed that we will not rent the aircraft except when conditions are urgent or critical.

In the house of the father-in-law who was so majestic I felt awkward. Bray's private room is larger than the company's official house. Located on the 2nd floor with shiny marble walls and floors. The room has a balcony overlooking the garden. The facilities are more luxurious than the hotel. There are a lot of waiters ready to help whenever we need help. This situation was a bit lame with my previous life and made me clumsy.

"I have a business meeting at club house X in Pantai Indah Kapuk. Come yuk!" Bray invited me to meet his colleague.

I'm shaking.

"Come on! Let you know the atmosphere of the club house here."

"I'll just relax at home."

"If to the club house it is more comfortable with the wife. Let's have a reason to go home."

"I'm tired, Mom."

Bray didn't force me. I don't know what the club house is and I don't want to visit it. According to the information I read on the internet club house it is an integrated sports facility that is usually held a modern housing for residents. I'm lazy to exercise. The long journey of these few days has made me tired. Want it on a leyeh-leyeh mattress expels fatigue. Maybe sitting in a recliner that slides over to the balcony drinking tea and enjoying the scenery around is more fun than going to meet people I don't know.

"You're okay being left alone, right?"

"Who said alone. There's papa in the basement. Servers and guards are many."

"But they have no right to enter this room" Bray said, raising an eyebrow.

I'm sure Bray was lazy to go to club house. But because there are informal meetings with business colleagues still have to be lived. Business opportunities and opportunities are not only obtained from formal channels. Casual meetings while exercising are also often a source of information and inspiration.

I don't want to be chatty. Enjoying the twilight on the balcony of Bray's room is fun too. Sitting in a reclining chair while reading a novel accompanied by warm tea and a small plate of banana boiled chocolate sauce.

Bray came home late. I don't know what time. When I was awake at about 11pm, Bray wasn't there yet. But when I woke up at 1am, the man had drooped with his chest open beside me.

I got up for a drink and offered a little midnight prayer.

After I got back to bed, I couldn't go straight to sleep. I looked at my husband's tired face in his sleep. He's smiling. I thought he was conscious or pretending to be asleep. In fact, he is still asleep. Funnier. I just found out that sleeping people can smile too. What kind of dream is he? hihah.

I rolled to the right, praying and repeating the words repeatedly. I deliberately did not count how many times I repeated the words until I was bored and tired. Usually, this will be faster to sleep.

The sound of dawn was faintly heard in the distance. Bray's still asleep. I woke him up because maybe he would pray together in the mosque as is his custom in our house. It turned out that he decided to pray at the home mosque only.

"Distant mosque. If you want to pray together must leave before the azaan."

Ooh, it turns out that we also live in a small house near the mosque. Bray becomes more diligent in praying. If you live in a big house, you will rarely go to the mosque.

"What's the schedule today?"

"Breakfast with papa. At 8 we have to go to the airport."

"So now I'm sorting out our luggage and luggage."

"Hm."

Bray looks paler than usual. His eyes look a little red. He looks so tired.

"Please rest if you're tired. What was the last night? How long haven't you been coming home? I waited until I fell asleep."

"Dissented long. It just so happened to meet Gufron also at the club house."

"Gufron?"

Bray nodded slowly. He put his body back in the bed.

I'm thankful I didn't go there. I still don't want to see Gufron. Confused about having to mince words with my cousin.

"Mas Bray how do you respond?"

"I didn't respond. It has nothing to do with my business colleagues. Want an ugly or beautiful wife, it's personal. Beauty is relative, after all. What he thinks is beautiful, not necessarily beautiful in my opinion. I wonder why he hates his cousin so much. You are good with her."

Oh, that's what Gufron did. I think what he did was embarrass himself. Gufron's wife was a famous photomodel. Her son is beautiful too. Not comparable to me. But it's not ethical to insult me in front of Bray's friends.

"I agree with Salman's move to bring the Gufron case to the legal track. You better not be obstructed. Gufron's evil to your family."

I can't comment. Actually I'm not mad Gufron said that. I realize there's probably a lot of people in town who don't rate me as worthy of Bray. I'm not as beautiful as a rich woman who is diligent in care at a salon or beauty clinic. My face is not super clear and glowing.

I don't care about Gufron. It's up to Salman. It is Salman who leads the plantation now. His right to prosecute the misappropriation of plantation funds into the realm of law. The most important thing for me is that our family remains peaceful and prosperous.

Sunday afternoon we returned to our tiny house and did our usual activities.

Our marriage journey became more difficult when the following month I was declared pregnant. Everyone was happy to hear the news, especially my father-in-law who really wanted the presence of the successor to his family dynasty. But I didn't. I feel depressed. Not ready to have children.

My emotions are up and down. Often angry and crying just because of trivial problems. I wish I was pampered, but Bray is busy with his work. While we were just the two of us in this house and I was reluctant to ask for help from others even if only just to lift the handle of HT.

"Do you want your mom to stay here for a while? Make it teach us how to cope with early pregnancy."

"The baby in my belly is not my mom's son, Mom. Our kids. Cook mama who has to bother." I protested.

Bray scratching his head.

"How do you know the solution, honey? You know I often panic not knowing what to do. I can't be the same at all times. While you are accompanied by Santi does not want to. Neither does my mom."

"Well accompanied by Mas."

Bray nodded. But behind me he grumbled.

I myself am confused as to why I tend to be finicky, demanding, and stubborn. My feelings are often uncertain. Sometimes fresh. Sometimes dizziness and nausea. But Bray always forced me to finish the food mama catering cooked.

"Eat the meal, honey. You must now eat for two lives. It has to be more than usual."

I slammed the spoon and fork on the plate. Cobalt. Dizziness and nausea are told to eat a lot. Where could.

"The food is not good."

Bray again bribed his food into his mouth and felt every chew of food that entered his mouth. "Nake it."

"Not good." I argue.

"What's so bad? I'm confused why you're turning into this. It's all wrong." Bray complained in a high tone and a look of despair.

Malicious. She hated me after I conceived her child. I regret. I shouldn't have been caught up in his love hypnotism. I want to be the old Fifa. I don't want to have kids yet. How'this? Tears are running down my cheeks.

"Why are you crying?"

"Don't love me and my baby."

Bray again scratched his confused head to face me.

"I worry about you because I love you. How many days have you never eaten. If this continues, then you and our baby will be malnourished. What do you want to say, I'll work on it later. Please, please eat enough. Suck drunk. Don't throw. It must be forced to eat for the sake of your health and that of our baby" he said in a low tone begging.

"I'm so dizzy, Mom. Nausea. I didn't understand how it felt to be me." I said, stomping my feet hard on the floor

"Sorry, Honey. Later I will learn to ask questions of the fathers whose wives have been pregnant. Now tell me, what do you want to eat?"

"Not eating. I'm going to sleep."

I left the dining table without finishing it. My head is getting.

Bray cleaned the dining table himself amid his confusion on my attitude. I heard he ordered my favorite mango juice. But now I don't want to eat or drink anything.