Just Pasrah

Maritalized

Lana walks cheerfully in the middle of a new university environment for her. He had already started to feel at home and at ease here, almost forgetting all the bad memories of his relationship with Kevin. With her new friends, she smiles and laughs happily.

However, his happiness was cut off when his phone rang. As he saw the call from his mother, a hint of worry slipped in his heart. He took a moment away from his friends and answered the phone.

Lana picked up the phone." Hello, Ma?"

Mama Lana called out to Lana with a hoarse and quivering voice." Lana, son, there's something you need to tell me"

Lana started to feel anxious, at this time Lana was thinking whether the situation at home was deteriorating, whether something was happening with her papa.

"What is that, Ma? What's going on?"

Mama Lana across the street is trying to hold back tears." Kevin.

Lana was speechless in disbelief, whether her ears were currently in trouble.

" Married? With who? How could...

" A girl huf. reported that she was pregnant, and Kevin felt responsible for it. He told us that he wanted to take responsibility and marry the girl"

" It's impossible... This can't happen...

" I'm sorry Mama, son, that Mama should tell you about this" Mama Lana said in a soft voice.

Lana tried to calm her mother quickly, "It's okay, Ma... It's not Mama's fault...

Mama Lana across the phone was obviously crying but not hysterical just once heard her hiccups that seemed to be being soaked.

" mom knows how heavy your heart is right now, son. Mama is very sorry this has to happen to you" said Mama Lana was not the mother and papah who encouraged Lana to get engaged first with Kevin.

Oh fortunately it was only the fiancee if married yesterday directly .Doesn't mean Lana has to carry her stepson in time.

"Damn, Ma... Goddamnit! kampret, am I not enough, mah ,hiks.hiks...

"Hopefully you can recover from this soon, son. You deserve the best" said the old mama who also knows not to be broken now. they were engaged before the child moved to this new university but it's not been 3 months now there's a girl who says she's pregnant with Kevin's child.

Which woman is not saddened by such an incident.

Lana was still trying to hold back the tears, she just felt her chest so sore like she was being squeezed by a rock with tens of tons but she was trying hard in front of her mother."Thank you, Ma. I'll be fine. I just need time to calm down "

Kevin has ruined Lana as a good girl, Lana doesn't expect that Kevin will do anything worse than that.

Now she impregnates another girl who was forced to marry. Lana's tears are no longer enough to express her sadness.

" Mama will always be there for you, son. Don't hesitate to contact Mama if you need support" her mother's voice across the street clearly shook like crying. Her voice clearly showed like that which made Lana also want to shed tears.

" I know, Ma. I tried to deal with it" said Lana who wiped her own tears.

Sad.destroyed, that's Lana now.

" I'll try, Ma. Don't worry because here is fine, Mama Lana there are many tasks where to go first huh mah, assalamualaikum"

"waalaikumsalam be careful so remember the message of mama" said Mama Lana across the street.

Lana hung up on him with mixed feelings. Sadness and disappointment mixed in his heart. Although he had almost forgotten Kevin, this news reminded him of what had happened between them. Inwardly, he pondered about his future that he would have to face without Kevin.

Lana is sitting alone in the campus garden, holding the phone in her hand. Upon hearing the news from his mother, his facial expression turned stiff, as if the world around him had stopped spinning. Tears flowed without a sound from his eyes, describing the deep agony in his heart.

"Kevin is getting married because there's another girl pregnant, ha.. Kevin's married...

In the gripping silence, Lana tried to absorb the news she had just received. His heart was shredded with sadness and disappointment. Although she doesn't love Kevin that much, the marriage should be theirs. But now, everything's changed because of another woman who's pregnant with Kevin's child.

"So what have I been considered? A hooker?heh.. Kevin's.. Kevin has you...

Lana feels a heavy blow when she realizes that she is no longer considered worthy by Kevin because her virginity has been lost. Feelings of worthlessness and feeling dirty began to ambush him. He felt like this world had no place for his already impure self anymore.

What am I living for? which man wants to marry a girl who is no longer a virgin like me?" muttered Lana alone.

In despair and confusion, Lana tries to find a way out of this complicated situation. His mind raged with questions without a definite answer. What should he do now? How could he continue his life with such a heavy burden?

The questions haunt him, making him even more immersed in deep sadness.

It's okay if Kevin marries another girl. It's okay, but Lana's dirty now. Every inch of his body has been enjoyed by Kevin.

Kevin should be thinking of keeping himself from being tempted by other women. Or Kevin is a guy like that who likes to change partners.

I'm dirty Mama...

Lana sat there, with no strength to move or speak. Tears kept flowing, showing how broken his heart was. He felt such great sadness and loss, not knowing how to deal with it.

In confusion and despair, he needed time to calm his mind, seeking strength to rise from the suffering that haunted him.

Lana felt the need to escape from the fatigue and disappointment that plagued. He decided to ditch the day and find a quiet place to reflect and let go of his emotions. With a broken heart and still watery eyes, he walked towards a hidden garden on the outskirts of the city.

The park is located on a small hill, among shady trees that provide shade and tranquility. The stretch of trails divides the park, giving Lana access to find the place she was looking for. In the middle of the garden, there is a small pond surrounded by beautiful colorful flowers.

Lana chose a stone bench by the pool, a comfortable place for her to sit and contemplate. The splashing sound of water from the fountain in the pond provides a soothing background. A gentle breeze whispered in his ear, bringing a hint of relief to the crumbling heart.

On the sidelines of the flowers that decorate the garden, there are large trees that provide perfect shade. The sunlight pierced through the crevices of the leaves, creating shadows that danced on the ground. The atmosphere of this place was so peaceful, as if inviting Lana to vent her emotions freely.

Lana sat on that bench, letting the tears fall freely. He had no need to hide his sadness in this place that was so desolate. This park gave him the opportunity to reflect, facing the difficult decision he had to take. Amidst the calmness of this place, he felt a little relieved and felt connected to himself.

While crying, Lana hopes that this place can absorb all her sorrow and sorrow. Although his steps felt heavy, this place gave him hope that with time, he would be able to rise up and find a way to move on with his life.

Can Lana.