Want a Life of Heaven

26. The wound has not healed

The wound has not healed yet,

The pain is always new.

***

On the same day, Agnia had been chatting again with the orphanage children after completing the study, her butt had been sitting uncomfortably even since in the campus hall.

Fun for him, sharing knowledge with people who are very enthusiastic about longing despite a drop of knowledge obtained. That pleasure is also what Agnia wants to share with her beloved sisters.

While Hafidz immediately he told him to go home after driving him first to a fried chicken shop. Didn't ask to be delivered again, his mood changed immediately earlier.

Agnia was annoyed in fact, her brother was not taking sides with her at the moment. He prefers Hafidz who is in the middle line only, no need to voice his heart.

Ahh, I want it to feel like Agnia said straightforwardly. "I don't want to get married!" it's just that her mother's great hope always silenced her mouth.

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"Can't be greedy, yes. share.." said Agnia, reminding the children who scramble even though Lisda, one of the two managers there has divided each of them fairly.

A smile emerged from the corner of her lips, Agnia shook her head in amazement, in her eyes now the children were no different from the chicks that were being fed by the mother. Noisy and do not want to lose quickly.

"Emh." Agnia scrunched her forehead, when she could not find the person she was looking for, after her eyes quickly cleared the children. "You seen Bily's sister?" he asked then, to a five-year-old boy who now sits nearby.

The boy looked up, shook his head while his mouth was full of big mouthfuls. Hearing the question, Riska who was going back and forth arranged her sisters to stop for a moment.

"Bily left this morning, Ma'am."

Riska, who was also wondering. Because he hasn't seen his peers since he left.

"Say where don't you want to go?" ask Agnia, so curious because it is not usually in the afternoon this way the boy is not seen the trunk of his nose.

Riska was silent for a moment, remembering. "No, no, ma'am."

Agnia scrunched her forehead back, somehow feeling worried.

"Judek. Continue eating, yes.. Everything's.."

Although still worried, he could not make the others fret. One box left, he saved it for Bily only later.

***

A quiet night where Agnia was already struggling comfortably with her sleeping costume, glasses were already perched on her nose, sitting at the study table facing the laptop. Disturbed Akbar as usual.

"Mister?!" Akbar appeared, pushing Agnia's room door without knocking. As usual, come to brag with her grin.

Agnia turned her head, looking suspiciously at Akbar. Already smelled the smell of rust from the arrival of Akbar.

Akbar grinned, sitting on the lip of his brother's bed. Facing Agnia who was sitting comfortably in her chair, facing the lighted laptop.

"Bak didn't take the parcel from Asthma, did you?" ask Akbar.

"Hhmm.." replied Asma lazily, looking back at the screen of her laptop after seeing the stubbornness of her sister.

"Pantes aja.." said Akbar hanging.

"Why?"

"Kids ask for Ma'am's account number."

Agnia then turned her head, looking at her interlocutor for longer. "Keep, you love?"

"No, that's not.."

Agnia nodded. Good, meaning his sister is still sane not to force himself to accept the money he has refused properly.

"I give you my account." said Akbar again, making Agnia immediately sniffed.

Akbar grinned, "Kidding."

Silent for a moment, Akbar forgot what he had wanted to say. Trying to remember again.

Astarghfirullah's.. Agnia closed her eyes for a moment, annoyed by Akmal's chirping which this time hurt her ears. He thought again if next time he should lock the door to his room. Even Akbar was completely insensitive with his silent reaction. Hey!! Mbak is not willing to be disturbed, so he said but what came out of his mouth was just a soft sigh.

"What yes..." Akbar thought again. Very serious though Agnia was very unconcerned. "Ah, forgot. I'll take it again" said Akbar

Perfect already he made his brother was incredible.

***

Akmal had just arrived by his car, arriving late at night after taking care of his one or two jobs at the Shop. He did not know if his work would take a lot of time, it turned out to be so complicated. He felt so much more tired than usual.

His tired eyes were so obvious, but after seeing a foreign motor parked there, his tired eyes spontaneously disappeared. Changed curious, who's visiting in the late hours like this.?

Akmal stepped in, pushing open the door of his house as he read his greetings. "Assynoltomodel.."

" Walaikumsalam.." answered the two men who were talking, almost simultaneously. "Well.. Here it is." said the father.

A friendly smile tried to be shown Akmal, although his heart grimaced when he saw the wall clock showed ten o'clock passing.

There are limits to the actual time it is not appropriate for someone to visit, and at this time, when the owner of the house is resting, gathered on a soft bed.

"Sit down!" tell Sidiq, to Akmal who is standing uncomfortable. "Where's the job?"

Akmal sat up, lifting his lips. "Current, Dad. Thank goodness.."

It was Basit, the middle-aged man that Akmal met in the mosque the other day.

"Son Akmal, remember me?" ask the man, with a smile.

Of course, Akmal nodded. Basit form for him imprints in memory. Easily recallable. He wondered now, whether this man went to his house at this late hour.Akmal's head was focused on the bed and blanket at this time.

"Because it's late, we shorten it" said Sidiq, understanding that his son was in need of rest. "So.. Mr. Basit's goal here, is to ask you to be willing to teach him this religious science."

Akmal showed an indecipherable look, making Sidiq gently hit his son's thigh to be careful with his gaze.

"I was too late in knowing religion." said Basit, answering Akmal's gaze which he saw was a little surprised.

"It's never too late, sir" Sidiq said. "All have the right to taste the pleasure of Islam. Especially at our age."

Akmal blinked, only to realize that his reaction earlier might be offensive. "Sorry, Sir. Not about that, but.. Why me?"

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***

Agnia lay down her body on her soft bed, sighing as she stared at the ceilings of her spacious room under the soothing rays of sleeping lights.

Always this way, when his busy life ended, after his energy was drained, loneliness filled him. He did not deny that his days after the failure of the marriage were very, very sad.

He who used to be a backrest for many people out there, now lamented that he had no one to lean on.

There is something lacking in life, so Agnia treats a little quiet in her niche. And this sense of desolation returned to the surface when he met Alisya again.

Disappointed, he felt. While they are happy in their marriage, he is just down in solitude.

The wound has not healed, because the pain is always new. And in fact the pain made him ever swear to no longer allow others to stop in his heart.

There were no tears, for everything that made her cry made her stronger.

Although the past was still as stinging as him, he was already much wiser in controlling his emotions.

With a breath escaping from her mouth, Agnia now changed her sleeping position to lie on the right side of her body. Staring at the small light that illuminated his entire room with warmth.

"Someone like this lamp, can I find it?" muttered.

A person who does not force himself to be bright, but enough to only give light that is able to warm the dark corner of his soul and full of disappointment.

The night was getting late, the round eyes with pliable eyelashes were slowly closing, ready to bring his mind across the river of a beautiful dream even though it did not mean anything.

Intention of the heart does not want to close the eyes, what is the power of the subconscious to realize, that to survive this self needs calm, indeed.