The text of the Raktara.

episode 40's

after 2 days of marriage ocean.jidan followed me along with mortal and vina to malang.that night dad called and said to me immediately to malang. attended the thanksgiving event for the award received by bang raka. his third web series was appreciated by many people.

currently the event has been running for almost an hour.bang raka also held an exhibition to satisfy the eyes of the guests with various hard work. oh yes, bang raka and ka meta have 1 child. his name is aisyah. she was only 2 months old I said she was so beautiful.

jidan and my two friends were looking at the results of the hands of the raka bang. They also greatly admired him. I just sat staring blankly outside the event.

"jan.." call bang raka after that I look towards him. bang raka directly sat beside me and looked towards the sky.

"jan.. lo why?"

"bang, what the hell is on your mind when you leave us, especially meta." I ask. maybe I will find the answer if I ask the bang raka whose position is almost the same as ka ilham.

"gue just want to find the happiness that I make myself. actually the family is not guaranteed our happiness. I need time to think whether I can leave you guys, let alone meta. I just have the belief that God will remain our soul mate if we both nga capeh. we both believe that we can skip this. and one more thing you should know. the inspiration went to find his identity, to find out whether later God will love him happiness or not. had 3 years he left and you are still waiting, you are still waiting, that means he also still believes lo will wait for him." he explained. bang raka suddenly understood the purpose or purpose of my question.

"i'm not even into him."

"lo may complain. may feel that it may not be what you want it to be like. But if you believe and you are sure, everything will happen according to your wishes even though the process is something that God changes. " continued.

"gue capeh bang. I want to meet but I'm also afraid to look at him. afraid that he does not fit the performance. huft, I nga sejago meta"

"yes" he said with a smile

"idihh what the hell."

"go yuk. " take it from me just nod.

"ayoo" bang raka pulled me up to walk with her.

thanksgiving today is quite rame.not only friends and family but also important people who realize the work of bang raka.

"woy.. Where are you going?" I was surprised when I moult my shoulders.I always think of things that are not important.and when I turn my head all I see are the three of them.

"from the outside" I replied expressionlessly.

"wrong?" ask jidan.

"compromise with nature or just numbness" I replied indistinctly.

"the answer is logical dong." continued savina.

"again think how to forget the same man who made me do not because.or just think for who my heart really is? or maybe thinking about whether he's gone forever or if I should be waiting forever" I replied and the three of them fell silent and looked at each other.

"jan." mortal reprimands.

"gue tried his best to feel fake like a coward." I left them.

I walk all I want. Don't disturb or disturb the things I want to do.

.

put up the earphones and walk in these beautiful clothes. wear flip-flops along with various steps that I count. activate airplane mode and play a soothing song.

I know they're going to look for me. I go outside the show and walk as I please. To be honest, I don't have a passion or know the path I just walked and I feel like I've been in the past. where I am happy alone and always compromise with solitude.

there were many things I saw. some were hugging, some were laughing together or were sitting while eating roadside food. I stopped at one place where there were a lot of drinks that smelled of coffee. I did not react and immediately stepped to open the door of the cafe.

"mba. 1 cappicino without sugar but if you can give a little cream can?" I told one of the servants.

"okay mba. at what table?"

"ready".

after ordering, I immediately walked towards the corner of the table.

I saw some people who were writing something and then pasted it on the mading cafe.

"this is the message.if there is a need can be called" he explained and I just looked without assuring.

"excuse me." he continued.

I inhaled the air from my drink and slowly felt their beauty making it. The aroma I liked very much..

I knew my family would worry.

we have been in the phase of wanting to be alone and do anything, can by crying or complaining and we must get it in moments that are not supposed to be.

I drank a sip of cappucino and then ate my snack and calmed down without having to think about things.

.

a few hours passed.

I've spent 5 cups of cappucino. my remaining customers in this cafe. they should have closed but I always busy them. and only 1 employee who accompany me. at the same time make a cappucino for me. he says he will serve me until I am satisfied.

"mba... would you like to make it again?"

"no need. My stomach is not capable." I answered and asked bill to him.

I paid after it stood up to leave but she held me back.

"mba, it's already very late.maybe you can go home alone" he said.it's true.now the clock shows at 12 pm and the possibility of returning home safely is very small.

"if you don't mind me I can do nemenin mba here. because I'm insomnia so, nga will be able to sleep and would just sit alone." he explained and I was silent to just think.

"you're coming home?" my many.

"eh, I happen to live in this cafe mba. so my house is well here." he replied and I nodded with a sign of understanding.

"owh. btw, do not call mba. feel old know nga?. call me jana aja. actually I ga insom but because elo alone so meningan I nemenin." continued me.

"eh I call him kaka aja.because I am still in college early semester.yaudah we sit there aja. yuk" he asked and I agreed.we sat and looked at each other. confused, confused, what to ask.

"would you run away from home?" tanyanya and I chuckled and then shook my head.

"gue nga as bad as that time also had to run away from home.I am a newcomer and I happen to make a show well, well, I have to attend dong but my mood is again not good so choose to go from the event." I explained.

"now must be the family kk again worried because kaka suddenly disappeared."

"hehehehe justin aja." I said and laughed a little.

well, maybe they're worried about me or they're afraid I'm crumbling and passing out on the street.

we told him a lot.he was named jihan. a university student who had just entered college. lived without parents due to divorce since Junior High.

the clock was 2pm and I decided to sleep on the sofa while Jihan slept in her room.