The text of the Raktara.

episode 33's.

2 months passed.

maybe a lot of people say I've really recovered, but honestly I'm not okay. I went through my daily routine like I used to just that I was no longer with dawn and nina. I didn't tell them much. not that I hate but I don't want to hear a lot of things from them that I don't know.

I was even still staring at the box in which there are a number of memories and items that should belong to him.Every waking up from the first sleep I looked at was 2 boxes that I did not dare to open.in the past, I did not want to open, I was very curious about the scroll but now it was as if I wanted to burn it. I wanted to throw it out of my eyes. I was always alone even though I looked very happy in front of many people. from earlier I even looked at the 2 boxes for 2 hours. I could not read or just open. (he) did not even contact me. lightly, I do not want to bother about it. if he does leave I beg him to leave for good.don't come or just pass in front of me. anything about him but don't know why I feel what I didn't feel when I was with him first. I feel something is missing. taken by nature and left to laugh in my heart.

I sighed and smiled looking at the 2 boxes. I promised I would read them after I had completely improved. Right now let me find something meaningful from myself.

I heard a knock on the door. I woke up and approached who was standing in front of me. bang Raka looked at me and shook his head. Only bang raka who knew my true condition.

"jan, go down yuk. we already want to walk this." he said.today is the day of application bang raka and ka meta. I looked at him after that nod marked with yes.

"it's just that I change my clothes first" I replied.

"beautiful yah" I smiled as bang raka told me to look beautiful.

I immediately got ready when bang raka went down. I wore a shirt that became a uniform for this event. I don't dare to wear high heels and I'm more comfortable wearing cats. I go straight down after locking the room.

"yuk" asked me when they saw those who were getting ready, and they looked at me seriously. They said I was beautiful but I took it for granted. today I have to be happy because both of the people I love need my smile even if it is only temporary

we traveled about 30 minutes.when we arrived at the application place there was already a vina and mortal waiting outside.

"huaaa.bang raka handsome really." said the mortal who might be fascinated. bang raka just smile and thank you.

" you both arrived quickly." I said.

"iya dong. btw, you are beautiful jan" replied Vina and I immediately put on a bad face.

"ayo. his show was about to start." fortunately, my mom reminded me that we would not be chatting here. I took the hand of bang raka and walked into the house owned by his aunt ka meta which was made as the location of the application.

alhamdulillah application went smoothly. ka meta looks very beautiful wearing a dress patterned flowers blue donker.

I shed tears when one by one sentence bang raka said to her lover who will be her life friend.

"are you with me forever?" the sentence meant a lot to ka meta along with the ring he wore. Mama hugged me tightly and whispered that mama was so happy they finally met and were together again. which started from a photo with a smile to become funny. I also took pictures with my two friends this. and that's how.

the clock shows at 9 pm. The show was finished this afternoon but the family still chatted a lot. Finally we went home until late at night. mortal and vina stay at my house. we went straight to the room after arriving home even to eat also not. tired once today but we are happy with the application event today.

"allahu akbar." said the mortal who immediately slept on the mattress after bathing.

"gue shower first" said Vina who went straight to the bathroom.The three of us were fighting over who took the shower first.

"jan, haven't you opened the box yet?" mortal suddenly talked about the box.maybe because he saw it.

"my males." I replied as if.

"read the 1 roll of paper.lo choose only 1 from dozens of existing papers. "mortal proposal and I just fell silent. after the vina finished the bath I immediately walked to the bathroom.

and a while passed, I came out of the bathroom and saw the hour that was already very late.mortal and vina had already fallen asleep. I took 1 roll of paper without looking at the day to how many rolls this paper was given. I then went downstairs to sit at the dinner table and picked up a bottle of cappicino after which poured it into this white glass. actually during my time in the bathroom I thought about and decided what I was going to do for these papers.

I read one word at a time on the paper I was holding right now.

"on the corner of the cafe.

the table I looked at was number 10.

the figure of the veiled woman that I had been looking for from a long time ago is still the same, the same,

even his gaze could break the glass of cappicino in front of him.

you tau? she's beautiful, like her mother, maybe.

fighting with her is an essential hobby for someone like me.

there is a taste but it is not what many people have in mind. I have a taste and only he feels. so does my creator.

_cafes"

I took a sip of cappicino I saw.

"don't smile alone.it's sane." I'm surprised to see a mortal suddenly appear beside me.

"astaga. logagetik I aja. feeling was again molor deh. kok can be here?" I said and mortal laughed.

"nih. bacain another one well. to ngobatin longing lo. bye" mortal gave 1 more roll of paper to me and I looked at him seriously. mortal brushed his eyes and left me.

"thanks fan" I said in my heart, then I opened the paper again.

"*this is the labyrinth I passed through.

no, I haven't been through it.

I'm still in it.

dark, quiet, no sound.

immediately lay the stones of the labyrinth wall.

I looked at it clearly.

and I smiled.

loving is not as easy as walking or running.

loving as complicated as the winding road that exists in the labyrinth.

you tau? I love you so easily with just one cynical look that I looked at.

you're so angry and I'm different.

you're.

l loved you.

don't guess whose name I'm calling.

if it's not you, then it's my God.

I'm afraid to love beyond limits.

boundaries that hurt thousands of people.

I don't want your name in the thousands of people I hurt.

you're too perfect for me to take your perfection.

understand each of these stanzas.

that loving is not as beautiful as being loved*."

here are 2 writings from the paper scrolls that I read. I understand now. about 1 thing.

that I love him and I fear to be lost from him, so I choose to be insinuated to miss him indefinitely.

i loved.

and he was the first man I ever loved.

love is not as beautiful as love.

and misses are not as beautiful as meetings.