sacrificial taste

Nadin (part 3)

"but zafran is not something I can just give you" I let go of his grasp

"please! please Vania, you might be able to enjoy your life for a long time while I am? only three months left of Vania, only three months left I have to be happy"

"is your happiness just zafran?"

"iyaa vania, I just need zafran!"

"you'll have me, you'll have our other friends! why should it be just zafran?"

"because I just want a zafran!"

"you won't understand nadin"

"you're selfish vania! you have everything! you still have a lot of chances to live and achieve happiness in this world, while I?"

"but nadin"

"but what a vania!!! you said I was your best friend, right? I just want a little something from my best friend"

"little thing you said?"

"i have only three months of Vania, only three months! I'm here to bring you a lot of hope, I just want to feel happiness with the zafran and I'm so begging you for it but what do I get?" nadin was in pain

"nadine! you all right?"

"i beg Vania, give zafran to me!" nadin looked very sick and very weak

"tell me nadin, what should I do?"

"give me a zafran, only three months left I have vania and the rest of the time I want to fill it with happy laughter! yes, zafran vania, zafran is my happy! I beg of you, let me make my wish come true" Nadin hugged me, I could feel the vibration of his extremely weak body

"i'll try nadin but I won't promise you anything! I can't be sure Zafran is willing to be with you"

"you're gonna fight, right?"

"fight?"

"what if you decide on zafran only"

"din! have you never thought of me? thinking about my feelings?"

"i think that's the only way for you and Zafran to separate, you can tell him that you never really loved him or you can also say that in your heart there is someone else"

*i was silent, not expecting how selfish this woman in front of me was! though we are both women and he could have said that*

***

I called my real friends to come to the hospital, I needed someone then! I was devastated for the second time, I was faced with a situation I had faced before but this was much more difficult.

"are you okay? why does it look so tense? can I get a doctor?" dika looked so worried when she had just arrived

"what's been going on? I know there's something that really shakes you up" Lana continued

"you've taken your medicine, haven't you?" junis

"nadin was here" I started the conversation

"uh uh? nadin?" Lana sat down and looked at me

"yes"

"why did he just meet Vania?" yuni spoke to dika

"what did nadin do here?" dika looks very serious

*i told them everything*

"Leukemia? nadin?" yuni looked shocked, not only she but lana and dika also looked very surprised by my story

"but you can't do that vania, you're gonna hurt the zafran!"

"no Lana, I don't know what else to do! I just want to get out of this world"

"nadin's not pretending, is he?" dikas

"no! no, nadin's really sick"

"don't do that to the zafran van! you can't play with her feelings as well as yours" Yuni continued

"do I have to decide on a zafran?"

"vania?" we were not even aware that the zafran had opened the door

"zafran, um..." Lana got out of bed

*zafran looked at me very coldly, in my heart said did he hear all of my conversations?*

*connect*