Instantaneous Sweetness

Hating me back

‘’Alhamdulillah, I have been able to see again the smiles painted on the faces of my parents. O Allah, may no more parting, my inner’’ is moved, with dewy eyes staring at the smiling parents.

***

I stared at my baby still sleeping in my mom's lap. A few minutes later, we got to the front of the house. Papa rushes to shut off the car engine, then opens the door for us. I stepped out, as soon as the neighbor looked at me with a strange and sharp look. Especially the mama who was carrying my baby, their gazes were so sharp looking at mama.

‘’Eh, Miss Elsa bring baby. His grandson yes?’’ asked one of the neighbors with a mocking smile. I looked at my mom just looking down.

‘’My son has a list of lectures. Uh, Monik has a baby.’’

‘’Who is it? Don't-don't don't know who his father is anymore,’’ he wrote with a cynical smile.

‘’Nah really, don't go home for a few months. Uh, I know she has a baby. Therefore, Bu Elsa and Mr. Indra were well educated, do not let out the malls. This just keep working, until forgot with the only child.’’

‘’Iya, very rich but her child is pregnant out of wedlock. Ihh, horror!’’ he said he was horrified.

‘’Don't bring here the bastard child, later even we who splashed his doom!’’

Mama's tears seemed to fall, while papa clenched his hands. As well as me, my chest felt tight and a circle of tears fell on my cheeks. It feels so, so painful.

‘’I know I have a lot of sins, but not like that too Mothers. You can insult me, but don't insult my Papa and Mama. Remember you guys have girls too!’’ my mouth with trembling lips and my tears kept falling.

As soon as all eyes are on me ,’’Allah, we educate children not like your parents. Pregnant out of wedlock still dare to also stay here!’’ next, don't lose.

‘’Huuuu! Come on Mothers we go!’’ They hurried to walk away, but their steps stopped.

‘’Wait! Don't you want to insult my family! You will know the consequences later!’’ upset papa with the tone of voice rising, his eyes reddened and clenched their hands.

‘’Pake threatens everything again! We'll talk for what it is!’’ he looked at my papa with a sharp look, then hurried to leave us. Mom's cry broke.

‘’Ma—Mama, I told you before. If I want to cost aja, but Mama and Papa do not allow,’’ said I wirih, approached mama and held her fingers that already looked wrinkled.

‘’Ma—ma’a me. Let me cost ya, Ma, Pa.’’

‘’Let him go, Ma. Papa is ashamed to have a child like him!’’ papa spontaneously snarled out of his mouth. Making my mouth stupefied made, so shocked this self. From the eyes of Papa there is hatred there. God, papa hates me back.

‘’Pa—pa, really? He's been fucking around. She's done a caesarean, Pa. Where maybe she can take care of her baby by herself,’’ mama shrieked with a vibrating voice, my baby woke up and cried instantly.

Mom tried to calm him down and persuade him. Yeah, I know mama must be worried about me, let alone me who just finished giving birth by cesarean section.

‘’I don't care, Ma. It was all he did, he was the one who had to bear the consequences. You tell him to leave in front of me right now! And bring the baby!’’ Degh's! I didn't expect papa to be able to get those words out of his own mouth, how much did you hate me?

‘’Alright, I'll go, Pa.’’ With tears constantly falling.

‘’Pa, how Papa changed kayak gini now?’’ mama asked softly between her cries.

‘’Yes Allah, why do you give me happiness for just a moment. I just saw a smile on my lips Papa and Mama. And now—‘’ I sat up while shaking many times.

Or perhaps this is God's reward for all that I have done. I have so easily given my honor to a man who is not lawful to me and I open not in time.

‘’Nothing, Ma. Let me go with my baby huh. Mama don't worry about me, help with do’a aja,’’ said while taking my baby in the lap of mama.

‘’Ba—how can you take care of your own baby, Nak?’’

‘’In shaa Allah, can. Mama don't worry ya.’’

‘’Ahh! Long pack again, go now napa hah?’’ ketus papa while stepping into the house. My tears immediately returned.

‘’You're patient yes, son. Ma’afy Papamu ya.’’

‘’Iya, Mom. Papa is not wrong. But I was wrong,’’ I said as I wiped my tears.

Yes, papa is innocent. I deserve all of this. Papa hates me because what I have done has made him gossiped and humiliated by the neighbors.

‘’I said yes, Ma.’’ I felt sorry for my mother, and she hugged me tightly, her crying broke again.

‘’Mama can not help anything, only do’a that Mama can say for you. However you have to go through all this,’’ said mama, slowly releasing a hug from me.

‘’Ta—but, Ma—’’

‘’Udah, Mama knows that you don't have any money. The money from the motorcycle was added to hospital costs. And fortunately Ayu also added,’’ sahut mama long.

‘’Still a lot huh, Ma. Ma’af me.’’ My tears are falling back. My baby was crying again.

‘’Sama-sama. Udah, pity your baby. She was crying too tuh.’’ Mama stroked my back slowly, then kissed my forehead. I slowly tear my eyes. But it still comes back.

‘’I'm sorry, Ma. Do’ me yes.’’

‘’Iya, Son. Remember, fix yourself again and ask for forgiveness from God, take good care of your baby. Later if there is anything just contact Mama.’’

‘’Oh yes, in this suitcase there is your hanphone,’’ advice mama, while thrusting the suitcase. I'll grab.

‘’Iya, Mom. In shaa Allah, do’akan me in order to become a better person again.’’ Mama nodded, immediately the circle of tears returned to wet the wrinkles of mama's cheeks. I b stepped with gontai out of my yard even though it felt heavy legs to step and although still not healed the former stitches in my feminine area. Kupandangi yard house.

‘’I used to play hide and seek here with Mama and Papa, accompanied by laughter. Now only hatred is visible in Papa's eyes. I will never forget my childhood with Mom and Dad. This house is a silent witness that I used to feel happy, I once joked with laughter with my parents, although now much different, my inner’’ looks at the yard of the house without interruption, he said, looking at the swing where when I was little I played there with my parents and I ran around and my mom and dad chased me.

It all came to my mind, the memories were how wonderful. Yes, how lucky I was as a child to have the affection of both my parents and even I was spoiled by them.

‘’Pa, Ma ma’afood all my mistakes. Even though Papa hates me, but I never feel angry in the slightest because this is all my fault. My mistake is not good at taking care of myself. I who so easily feel the sweetness of a moment and I who break not in time. Allah! Although I have many sins, please take care and give health to these two people I love very much. I have to go,’’ my inner look back, looking at mama with a sad look.

Mama tried to keep smiling, her eyes looked dewy. I decided to step back, even though I did not know the direction to go. A moment later I was out of the yard. I stared at it, there were a few pairs of neighbor's eyes looking at me with a sharp and strange look.

‘’Maybe carried by Mr. Indra time. Forced to leave, so educate real children. Yes Mothers?’’

‘’I guess all this time he's a good boy. Uh, even pregnant out of wedlock in fact.’’

‘’Nah, right. Rich but his son is so, good to live like we are. Even if it is poor but not a lot of problems, our children are well educated!’’

‘’Agree, now look at the lock. Bring his bastard son again, who would want to help him if so. Which anyone gets unlucky later!’’

Allah! My body immediately felt helpless, my breath was panting, my chest was tight, my heart was like smithereens and my tears were falling instantly. He thought I didn't hear all his insults, thought I was deaf? Do I have to fight? But in my heart I also justified their words. Uhh! Never mind, the most important thing now is that I want to find a place to live for my son temporarily. I looked over for a moment with tears rolling down my cheeks. Then hurried over without looking over and without caring about their words.

‘’Huuuu! Go there, don't pantes stay here! Bring your bastard son!’’ hardik them simultaneously.

‘’Allah, what does it say? My son is innocent, my son knows nothing. My father and I were wrong. Not my son, my inner’’ was irritated by the deep heartache.

‘’Ma’af Mama yes, Son. Because your mother is insulted by people, you become like a gini,’’ I said softly while peeping his forehead.

Yes, my son was born into this world because of me and Andre. He's innocent, he knows nothing. The words of the people made my heart break. They blame my son who knows nothing, my son is innocent. I am the sinner.

‘’We go first yes, who knows if there will be a place to rest. You must be tired and thirsty, right, honey? Patience well.’’ I stroked her cheeks that looked flushed.

And I decided to step back, not knowing where the legs would be going and which direction I would go.

‘’Allah! Tired really feel, this is what it feels like to hold a child huh?’’ I groaned while wiping the sweat that was pouring out with the tip of my sleeve.

The instantaneous horn sound was able to make me stop a step.

‘’Whose car is it?’’ I looked at him for a moment.

Seriate.

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