Assalamu'Alaikum Love

Convictions

Gibran

The rain that had fallen since dawn had still left a drizzle as I got out of the car and looked up. Paying attention to the seven-story building before me which from today will be my place of work. Letting the drizzly fine speck wet my glasses and make my vision blurry because of the rain.

“Alright, it's time to correct your behavior and behave like a 28-year-old man, Gibran.” I murmured and sighed softly. Feeling different feelings on Monday morning is not something people want to feel, nor am I.

I actually felt that this morning. The mixture of spirit and laziness blend into one and try to beat each other. I am excited because today is the first day I started my career as a lecturer after just going to and fro doing research and becoming a private tutor for a few students for a year after I finished the program my magister two years ago.

But considering that starting today I will lose my freedom of sleep until noon makes me grumble indefinitely too. Coupled with the remnants of fatigue because the trip from Jakarta to Surabaya last week was still felt, and it made me more lazy to get out of bed even though it was seven in the morning.

“Dan? That means that every day you will meet with students who are still innocent and cute, man. I'm so envious of half-dead with you.” I even remember the sarcastic sentence that Haris gave me when I said I had to move to Surabaya and start teaching at one of the private universities there.

Haris, my college friend who was somehow stranded as a manager of a regional basketball team while in college the boy majored in Islamic management, was the same as me.

“Unfortunately I have not been so desperate as to be interested in a minor, Ris.”

A bachelor and master of islamic management. Well, do not imagine the figure of a Gibran Wibisana who is pious, calm and religious because he studied Islamic background for six years. Because in fact I am no different from my college friends who majored in civil engineering or mechanical engineering.

No Gibran is polite and meek to be the ideal son-in-law of the parents. Nor can Gibran be sweet to everyone by smiling broadly and speaking kindly. I'm still a 28-year-old man who rarely replies to his fellow friends like I do with Haris.

“Indeed you think how old a student is, man? Youngest is also eighteen years old and you won't look like a pedophile just for dating an eighteen-year-old girl.” And remembering the words Haris made me shudder in horror as I walked through the campus and occasionally nodded and smiled at the students who greeted me. But Haris's unyielding sentence made my mind work even wilder than before and started thinking about how old a sixth-semester student I should be for another half an hour.

“Pak Gibran.” The greeting of a man in a batik shirt just like the one I wore made me get rid of the ridiculous thought about the age of a sixth semester student. She smiled kindly and returned the man's hand. Beni Atmaja, a lecturer in Business Ethics who also has to open a morning class for sixth-semester students.

“Pak Beni,”

“The spirit of teaching on Monday morning?” the man I was guessing was just entering his forty years looks so excited as he lines my steps towards the multimedia room where my class was held this morning. It was a contrast with me who even still had a sour face despite being in front of the class.

“Slightly nervous, sir.” I'm not lying, because I was a little nervous today.

“Just relax sir, just introduce yourself, Mr. Gibran, give the students a smile, and they will easily like young lecturers like mr.” And I just laughed blandly to respond to the funny Mr. Beni who seemed so trivialize teaching activities on my first day as a lecturer.

“Pak Gibran is married?” a girl in a light blue headscarf who was sitting in the row of seats number two even boldly asked me such a thing when I had just finished introducing myself. Makes me smile again and shake slowly.

“Not yet. Maybe I am still far from the typical dream daughter-in-law of the candidates-in-law.” My short answer invited the laughter of the whole class. And seeing their laughter all made me recall Haris's words last night.

“Students now are not as good as students of our time, man. It could be that their minds are wilder than your own.”

Although Haris said it while chuckling, I still thought of such a possibility. And I'm watching for myself now. How wild and free the thinking of the sixth-semester students I guessed their average age was twenty.

“If girlfriend, sir?”

Really, does a student really have to ask such a question to the male lecturer who taught him? Ah, millennials. Again I remembered Haris's words, and I subconsciously took a deep breath and exhaled him back slowly.

“Dating is forbidden religion, can not.” My answer is also unobtrusive because I really do not want to be considered a new lecturer who is arrogant because it does not answer trivial questions from students.

But actually I also can't completely blame the students for asking me things that are too personal, because that means they are still normal students who have an interest in the opposite sex.

“Desire to be known and recognized within the class.”

I can't help but smile thinly while starting to open the dictate I brought from the office and I haven't had time to touch it again after I put it on the table half an hour ago.

Not only the students, actually, I also did the same thing by flocking a female lecturer who had just taught in my class while I was studying undergraduate programs. Giving the female lecturer silly questions that had absolutely nothing to do with the course just because I wanted the beautiful lecturer to recognize me as her student.

Just like me, the students asked me silly questions because they felt I needed to get to know her and admit that they were one of my students.

Because everyone wants to be recognized and needs what is called the recognition of others. It's as simple as it really is.

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