You Who I Miss

Dicky's Mother

There are days when I love you, with all my heart. And there are days when I love him. But trust me, my heart chooses you

- Rissa Valentina

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I was crying in my room. I can't believe it's going to end up like this. I'm constantly blaming myself for what happened. I also went to Iqbal's room, and apologized to him. But, I know my mistakes cannot be forgiven by him.

The clock showed at three in the afternoon. It's time we all went back to Jakarta. We were all getting ready to leave the villa. I tried to put my suitcase in the trunk of the car. It's heavy, but luckily Iqbal came to help me.

So glad Iqbal helped me. He still cares about me. I said "Thank you" to her. My pleasure was gone. Iqbal is still mad at me. He just kept quiet, then left without saying anything.

I don't know what I have to do to get Iqbal's forgiveness and trust again.

"Rissa." call Yanti's mother. I looked up to see Mother Yanti walking towards me.

"Follow Mommy yes come home." said Yanti's mother to me. I kept quiet while looking at my Mom and Dad.

"May you take jeng tiya." said Yanti's mother to my mother.

Mom and Dad stared at each other for a moment. Then she smiled while nodding her head.

"Yes, I can." said my mother.

"It looks like our car also does not fit, many items that want to be taken." said Mother.

"Thank you jeng." said Yanti's mother happily.

"Look baby." Yanti's mother told me.

I just kept quiet as Mom put her arm around me, taking me to the car. I looked at Iqbal who saw me. I shook my head at him, hoping Iqbal would prevent me from getting in Dicky's car. But Iqbal was silent.

I don't want bal! Please prevent me!

I honestly want to refuse to come. But, I don't feel good about Mom Yanti and Dad Rahmad. After all, they were like my own parents.

"Rissa" said Dicky confused to see me. I just kept staring at him.

"Rissa's coming with us." Yanti's mother told me. Dicky's speechless. I saw that he was quite surprised to hear his mother's words.

"Dear, come in." said Yanti Mother opened the car door for me. I smiled and got in the car.

"Dicky, just shut up, you come in, come on" Yanti's mother told Dicky. Dicky got into the car from the other side.

"Udah?." asked Rahmad's father to Yanti's mother.

"Udah." said Yanti's mother. The car left the villa.

"Mother, there's rissa here" said Ms. Yanti. I smile. But in my heart I want to cry.

Along the way. I just quietly watched the street bogor-jakarta through the car glass window. Dicky asked me to talk, but I just answered. The mind is filled with Iqbal. And Iqbal must be daydreaming like me right now.

It was dark that day. I thought I'd be taken home. However, I was wrong. I wasn't taken to my house. Instead of being taken to Dicky's house. If I had known, I would have been taken home to them, I wouldn't have.

How here! I'm going to see Iqbal!.

"Let's go in baby first." said Yanti's mother to me. I just nodded.

"Come ris." take Dicky. I stayed at my place.

"What's wrong?." asked Dicky.

"No pa-pa" I said.

"Surely, you're fine." said Dicky.

I shook my head. Then I don't know why I'm crying in front of him. Dicky seemed surprised to see me suddenly crying for no reason. But, I know the cause of all this is my fault with Iqbal.

"I'm sorry, it's my fault" Dicky said. I just cry while hiccupping.

Then Dicky hugged me. So tight. But I just kept quiet, crying on his shoulders. I know Dicky just wanted to try to calm me down. But, I can't deny that I really like being hugged by him. However, on the other hand I also thought about Iqbal. Maybe Iqbal is waiting for me to come home, I don't want Iqbal to worry about me and think about the no-no because I'm with Dicky.

"I want to go home" I said, crying.

"Yes, I'll take you home" Dicky said.

"Don't cry anymore, I'm anterine" Dicky said, wiping away my tears.

"Wait here yeah, I'll get the car keys first" Dicky said. I nodded while wiping away the tears with my hands.

"Mommy, I'll drive Rissa home." said Dicky as he walked into the house.

"Why?, it's too late, tomorrow" said Ms. Yanti from inside the house. Yanti's mother then came out to see me.

"Rissa wants to go home?" asked Yanti's mother.

"Yes ma'am." I said.

"Udah malem dear, nginep here only, tomorrow just go home" said Ms. Yanti. I shook my head.

"Rissa's tired, mommy's willing to take a break" Dicky said, helping to find an excuse.

"Yes come in baby, sleep inside." said Ms. Yanti.

"Let's go rissa baby in." said Yanti's mother. I just stayed quiet in my place.

"Mother, the medicine is staying, she can't be late for the medicine, just get rissa home ma'am" Dicky said.

I don't know why Yanti's mother held me in her house. Even though I want to. But, I have to meet Iqbal and apologize to him.

"Why are you outside, what is it?" asked Rahmad's father.

"Rissa wants to go home" Dicky told Rahmad's father.

"Oh yeah, if Rissa wants to go home, we can't make her stay here" Rahmad's father said.

"Yes ma'am, izini, rissa come home ma'am." said Dicky pleading.

"Yes, be careful on the road, tomorrow play here ya ris." said Ms. Yanti.

"Yes ma'am." I said slowly.

After saying goodbye to Mother Yanti and Father Rahmad. Dicky and I went straight to my house.

Along the way, I was crying incessantly. I kept thinking about Iqbal. And plus think about the feelings of Mother Yanti. I don't know why Mother Yanti held me back. Maybe Yanti's mom wanted me to be with her before I went back to Grandma's house. Or maybe he wants me and Dicky together. I don't know.

That day, I made the two people I loved disappointed with my attitude. But I could do nothing but cry, cry and cry. Dicky kept telling me to calm down, but I still couldn't.

Maybe because I was upset to hear me cry. Dicky pulled his car over on the side of the road.

"Rissa, don't cry, you calm down" Dicky said.

"Can't" I said as hiccups.

"Try to see the sky, you see the stars, right" he said. With a hiccup, my eyes stared at what Dicky was pointing at.

Then Dicky pressed my face in the middle between the eyebrows with his thumb. I was surprised by what he did.

Then he moved his finger down my nose and up to my forehead. He repeated the move until it made my eyes look good. I'm sleepy. I don't know where Dicky learned that. But it managed to calm me down and fall asleep. Maybe he learned from his doctor. But I think Dicky is like a magician, who can win me over without sleeping pills.

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