The Complicated Love #2

CL - 04. Not Me

“For a feeling like the wind, it will easily fly away just like that. Without having to imprint or leave a trail of pain.”

“Where's the interview?” Nina asked while we were having dinner together at home.

“Walk well. But I decided not to work there.”

“Loh why?”

“Yes please, about salary.” Answer lies.

“Not that it is not one of the considerations you work yes?”

“Us not used to, but now yes.” Answer thus.

“Do you not go bankrupt? Haha..” Ask joking.

“Not. This is because - because of the fashion collection in your store again a lot that I want so I should have an adequate budget. Hehe..”.

“Huuu basic..reason really.”

“Eh this Sunday night, you did not come out with Tefan?” My toot.

“Neg. He's got a job out of town. Now he is again in Semarang, taking care of his business branch he is there. He said he wanted to open a cafe and billiard as well, now he is very busy. So I'm trying to figure him out.”

“Wah. Already there are how many branches of the Cafe which is also the place of the billiard?”

“Now only two are running normally, the same three in Semarang will be.”

“Oh. So tonight we are the same - just as happy at home dong.”

“Daddy. Besides I'm also tired, that's a pretty rame boutique I have to intervene all.”

After dinner, Nina and I watched the movie together in the living room, but she rushed into her room as soon as she got a call from Tefan. I just understand and try to relieve the waves that arrive - suddenly hit so pain in my chest. Nina finally did not come out - out of the room again, maybe immediately rest after getting a call from Tefan. The fate of singles, I continued watching until twelve pm.

The quiet atmosphere in the living room and the dim lighting make this night so shady. The vibrating sound of the gadget distracts me from the Digital TV screen and focuses on the gadget screen.

Call from Tefan.

“Not sleeping?” Ask someone from the end.

“Not yet. Again watch movies alone.”

“Yeah earlier Nina also told you that you guys watch movies. Sorry so rarely contact you, lately a lot of work and have to go there to come.”

“It's okay. Remember I was already part of you still care about me. Hmm.. Why so melow like this anyway. How are you doing there? Now what's it?”

“Lumayan bothered to take care of everything, fortunately there was Reno who helped if not my body may have been crushed times. Now just sleep in the room, Reno again went out to where he said. Maybe again can be new in semarang times. Haha.”

“You do not porsir very powerful, you also need enough rest Fan. Your body even though healthy and good as it is now if the name is tired it must have fallen too.”

“Since when did you become chatty about the body I tried?” God's flirtatious.

“Since I can not hug you because your stomach starts to grow aka distended.” Reply tease.

We both laughed on the phone. Remember, it's been a long time that Tefan and I have never spent all night. Lastly in lembang, even so early in the morning Tefan had to leave me because there had to be a sudden meeting.

“You sleep well, don't stay up again.” Said later.

“He deh. The movie is also over. Good night Fan..!”

I also went to the room after making sure everything containing electricity in the living room was dead. Except for one dim light that is always left lit near the living room sofa.

***

Since the meeting between me and Papa Tefan, I never again planned to include CVs to companies. Every day I just do the same activity, to Nina's boutique, the street, stop by the restaurant that I've never noticed and most watch movies at the rented house.

Because of daily activities that never change that Nina often chatty but I never ignore. Although a little distracted also because it does not do anything right - really enter the work count is also very boring. I finally chose to focus on the restaurant that my cousin had been running. I can't avoid it anymore, because soon my cousin will soon let go of his bachelor. Automatically his attention to the restaurant will be slightly divided by his own household affairs.

Restaurants that specifically provide typical West Java food are quite crowded visited every day. Moreover, during the weekend visitors can come twice than usual. It turned out that my cousin had been taking care of it very well, which is why I had to learn a lot of business science and manage the business properly on him. Regardless of how this restaurant is mine, something that began only because it was coerced by my cousin for his love of culinary. So be this restaurant with all its capital is absolute from me, my cousin is the full manager of this restaurant.

The restaurant called The Javas Culliner is about three years old, so it is quite well known by the people of Bandung at least. Some visitors who happen to vacation to Bandung also sometimes eat here. Therefore, I had to learn to love my new job in order to keep the restaurant going well or even succeed and have a branch going forward.

Tonight I plan to stop there and study with my cousin. Her name is Jane, she is indeed her passion in the culinary field and cooking. So the chef and the other kitchen affairs he's all that recruits. Selected based on skill, speed and accuracy of work, capable and hygienic. He liked the restaurant kitchen the least bit so messy or dirty. Therefore, all employees in their jobs are very concerned about the cleanliness and health of the restaurant from its place to its offerings. Otherwise, Jane herself would not hesitate to fire an undisciplined employee.

Horrified also if you have to deal with Jane, he is famous for being very disciplined and scary for most restaurant employees. But behind his attitude, he was the kindest person I have ever known in my family. That's why I entrusted my capital to open this restaurant business. So this restaurant is not only fully mine but there is also a part of Jane that will not be denied. Although Jane does not necessarily manage the restaurant in full, but I still appreciate her hard work so far. So half the profit from this resto is clearly still in Jane's account.

I was enjoying a glass of juice and reading a magazine in the back garden when Nina arrived and called from her shop.

“Na..” His voice was short and his voice sounded raucous.

“Nin, are you okay?” many ensure. But the voice I heard was just a sobbing from Nina.

“What's Nin? You're crying?” ask me again with a worried tone.

“Tef... Tefann... Na's. Tefan and Reno crash on Toll while traveling from Semarang to Bandung.” Nina's voice was called out even more violently and her cries were completely broken.

I was in shock and couldn't breathe for a moment when I heard the news. My body is like a dreg and just sitting in a chair, how is Tefan?? That's all that's milling around in my head.

“Ba—how can Nin? How is Tefan doing? Where did you get the news?” I kept running because of anxiety.

“I do not know clearly the condition but at this time he said they have been taken to the nearest hospital. I want to follow, you want to come?”

I was quiet for a while, trying to think straight back. If for example I was with Karenina, I would most likely meet Tefan's parents and obviously they wouldn't let me meet Tefan. I have to how is God?? My complaint is in my heart.

“Na..?” Calling Nina on the other end of the phone is like making sure I'm still on the line or not.

“Ii-iya Nin. You go there first, Tefan will definitely need your presence there. I can catch up later.” I finally chose to hold back. I don't want things to get run down and out of control.

Although I was honestly also very worried about Tefan's situation, but I couldn't do much. I'm just an unwanted part of the Tefan family and if Tefan's parents tell Nina about me and Tefan maybe forever I'll never be able to relate or even meet again with Tephan. I just hope Tefan and Reno are okay. At least they did not suffer serious injuries and soon could return to Bandung.

“Alright then, you're fine - what's Na?” Ask Nina later.

“Dad, I'm fine. You should leave immediately, greetings to Tefan hopefully he is fine and the wound is not too severe.”

“Daddy, hopefully. We both pray well.”

“Okay, bye Nin. You be careful with the drive.”

“Siap.”

What else is God now? Tefan was in an accident and I wasn't even the only person who had to be next to him while going through critical times. I've never been this fragile before, but it's different for Tefan. He always gets more of my attention than anyone. I'd love to be by his side right now, it's just that there are people who are more entitled to it.

In the chair and the juice that had not finished, I cried alone. My tears can't be contained anymore, escaping without me preventing it.

If it felt like the wind, it would easily fly away. Without having to cut or leave a trail of pain. The reality is I can't dispel the pain where there should be people by his side and it's not me.