Show One Star to NAIYSA

episode 12

 

I was still looking at my own reflection in the mirror, and I was still cool to look deeply into my own face, I don't know what made Dika still maintain such a great sense towards me, I felt that there was nothing compared to Naisya, he was much more than me, the comparison was like heaven and earth, everything was clearly much different between my appearance and his life, he said,obviously I feel really low if I have to be with a Dika, I can't imagine if Naisya knows this feeling and knows about my cheating with a Dika, I can't imagine if Naisya knows this feeling, I don't know if I feel like I've committed a big sin that's made me even more guilty.

 

Ahh.... If I could turn back the time I want to feel like I drove away and did not heed what I had been worried about, I don't know this became a bomb for myself and my best friend Naisya.

" Anna.." a soft distinctive voice surprised me from my long daydream, Grandma looked gently at me and gently squeezed both my shoulders.

" What are you thinking ??"

" there is no Grandma." I said as I gently touched the warm fingers that looked wrinkled touched me.

" Granny knows what you're feeling, Grandma can't be lied to even if you say nothing," said Grandma with a full glance at me, I was silent trying to harbor feelings that began to whip in my mind, I don't know what to say, I don't know where this story started.

" let's say...." Grandma was sitting in front of me with eyes that were deeply touching my heart.

I don't know what makes me cry so when my Grandmother's words destroyed the defense of my feelings that I've been craving all along.

I don't know, this crying feeling suddenly broke and shattered in my Grandmother's lap.

" weep .. if you feel sad.., let go .. if it can make you satisfied." said my grandmother in a hoarse voice

I really can no longer answer it just began to feel tight holding my sobs that I can no longer stand.

" I have betrayed Nay Nek." I said softly with a slight sob.

" what have you done ??"

" I love Dika and Dika love me, we love each other without Nay's knowledge, "I said in a brick

" i don't know what if Nay finds out about this, especially if Nay is in his current condition."

I stared at my grandmother.

" i was afraid that this feeling would hurt Nay, and would make his condition worse." I said a little roar.

Grandma seemed to take a deep breath and looked at me with a million uncertain feelings, My grandmother seemed to understand what I was feeling.

" What should I do Grandma ?"

for a moment my grandmother was silent she did not reply to my question there was a shock that I felt strongly from her.

" Anna, you better stop not to expect Den Dika.." he said softly with the look of his eyes seen beginning to condense with a clear melt in his eye patch.

" do you mean Grandma ?

" forget Den Dika, he is definitely not worth you, and yet there is also something more appropriate for Den Dika is Neng Nay." said my Grandmother with a slight tremble of her voice.

something heavy has happened to me, yes something has been strong hit me I am powerless and can only realize with regret.

" The worm will remain a worm will not become An's dragon, and the mojair fish will not become gold, think back to An to keep your feelings.." said Grandma gently stroked my hair lovingly, I don't know how the middle-aged woman suddenly felt transformed into a friend who really understood my feelings.

my tears broke when this feeling called far away the figure of a mother, if I had to imagine what a mother looks like, maybe this is the time when I really need hugs and all the warm approaches that can strengthen me, yes my cry really broke more and more lamenting all forms of injustice.

" There will be other joys that will fetch you." Grandma grabbed my hand tightly and listened to my face with full force.

I can't answer the tightness in my chest, there's not a word that can come out of this mouth, it's really hard to express everything about this taste.

The sound of the engine rang from outside my house, realizing me from my small cry.Then I stared outside, the sound of the car engine stopped right in front of my house, I was stunned from my seat along with Neneku, for a moment I and Grandma looked at each other trying to guess the arrival from behind the car engine that was soon stopped, followed by a small sound of the car door closed.

I quickly wiped my tears and tried to clear up my situation.

Grandma swiftly left my room and approached him.I just stared quietly away at the outside of my window.

I realized that I remembered Dika's words to meet him this afternoon..

" o Lord.." I stared at my alarm clock.

" it's 4 o'clock, Dika.." My pack covered my mouth with both hands.

" Anna.. There's Den Dika with Nenk Nay.."

" Yeah Nek.." I answered briefly, I turned to my mirror these eyes were a little damp and these cheeks immediately looked red.

suddenly, Nay has poured into my room with a carefree look and very cheerful.

" Nayy.." she quickly grabbed me tightly.

I was silent trying to hide the hue of my face that did not look dripping.

" we go to the yukk again.." invite Nay to take me to go to the rankeng, rangkeng is a type of small cottage in the middle of the hill, yes where we played when we were small, rangkeng, and in that place our witnesses were close friends.

" Rangkeng.... ?? " i asked to look at the face of Nay who still looks cheerful.

" yeah... the same Dika.." said Nay while shaking my shoulder shake.I was silent, I wanted to feel like I disappeared for a moment this moment also to not show the sadness that I am feeling right now.

" Ann.." Nay looked at me for a moment as he tried to listen and look at my face.

" why ?"

" are you crying ??"

" no.." I said, turning my face away

" don't you like lying from me ?" nay said as she continued to chase after me with her gaze.

" ahh. I'm just missing again."

" kangen ???" ask him with full attention.

" hhh forget it." I said, holding back the tears that began to expand in my eyes.

" An...., rhyme when can you stay away from me ?" ask her with a little sharp look at me.

" Nay.." as kelu.

" you don't want to talk to me anymore ?"

"....." I shook my head while hugging Nay's hand tightly

" I miss going ..." I hang, Nay listens to me looking curious

" kangen my parents.." as bowed I don't know what drama I'm playing, I don't know, I just want to look good not to show my sadness in front of Nay by pretending I feel bad about the deceased to my two parents.

" ah... Nay.. forgive me.." said Nay while holding me, hugging me gently.

" i'm sorry.." he said, gently rubbing my back.I can only sob in my best friend's arms.

" cry.I feel what you feel, both your parents are my parents.and both my parents are your parents too, I am your husband." nay said with a gentle smile to me, that was the word that always strengthens me, Nay is always present when I am really fragile, but I don't know what makes me feel these tears a true lie that has fooled the empathy of a sahabtaku

" you're not alone, there's me. Mom, and now there is, we're friends." Nay looks glassy.

it was painful if I had to see him cry sincerely for me, I was silent trying to keep hiding behind my hypocrites.

" yeah.you tea do not be sad continue, I follow sadh nee.." said Nay while wiping his tears, I smiled freshly staring at Nay, Nay, his figure really sincerely loves me.

" Wait for you, yuk.!!" said Nay, wiping my wet tears on my cheeks.

I just nodded slowly and smiled heartily.

slowly I followed the steps of Nay who held me out of the room, while Dika looked familiar chatting with my Grandmother, I don't know what they were talking about.

When I glanced at him a little stiff, I just glimpsed at the look on his face a little moping, looking at me a little disappointed, but I tried not to stare any longer.

I said goodbye to my Grandma to go out for a while with Nay and Dika to go to where we play small.

Dika is still looking at me clingy I don't know what's on his mind.

at the end of my gaze Grandma looked at me full of haru, her sadness was clearly visible from the corner line of her bated lips, I could only smile expressionlessly, trying to convince her that I was okay.

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