Second Time

MISTAKES IN THE PAST (2)

"Your mother can never be separated from someone in the past, she can never love me completely."

"Ti.impossible." I gaped at every word that came out of my father's mouth.

"It feels so bitter to me, but no matter how hard I try, I still can't change anything about your mother."

"To..why? What really happened between mom and dad?" My brain is really hard to digest what Dad said.

"Your father and mother were married not because they both wanted Dafa. I love your mother, but not your mother. He could never change his feelings. Your mother kept saving love for someone in the past."

"No way, dad." I felt so disbelief, all this time their relationship was fine. Our little family looks very harmonious at all times.

"Sometimes what you see between us is different from what Dafa really is, you have to be able to understand and accept everything."

"Dad, are you just going to let go of mom?"

"Dad tried so hard for your mother, it's the best thing for both of us."

"Didn't you want to keep mom anymore?"

"It's not that, keeping your mother only makes her more hurt."

"What about dad? is he hurt too?"

"If you could look into my heart, maybe you'd know how much love and hurt it is now filling." Father chuckled bitterly laughing at his own heart.

"Dad."

"Dafa, I want to see your mother happy. He's suffered enough to live with dad to date."

"But father."

"That's it, you know everything now. One day if you start a household, make sure that you and your partner are no longer tied to a relationship with someone else. Finish your relationship so you and your partner don't hurt each other."

"Yes, dad." I nodded, I realized how deeply it affects the future of one's life.

"Hows it? have you decided who to go with? Brian must have told you, right?"

"M." Mmm." I'm nodding.

"How's it?"

"Let me think first, father."

"Well, after the whole thing is over, I'll be back in Thailand as soon as I can, if you haven't decided yet, you can call me later."

"Good dad."

"Dad only wants what's best for you, make the best decision for yourself, I won't force anything on you. Forgive me for everything that happened, Dafa."

"Yes, dad." I'm out of words.

"Get some rest, your mother doesn't seem to be coming home. He's avoiding Dad, he's probably staying at the boutique."

"M." Mmm." I'm nodding.

"Dad also wants to rest first, good night Dafa." She smiled

I nodded, father got up from his seat and walked towards his study. Looks like he chose to rest there instead of going to his room. I stared at the back and shoulders that were always upright. Right now I see a little fragility there that he's always trying to hide. That's how dad is, he's always trying to be someone who's responsible for his family. He always looks tough under any circumstances, I don't realize at all if all this time he was so hurt by the decades-old marriage.

I also did not expect that mom was still tied to her mass. I don't know how much my mother felt about someone in those days until she couldn't keep our little family. I felt a little upset by my mother's attitude, but I had already told you to promise not to hate anyone. I decided to go see Mom, I wanted to hear an explanation from her.

I drove the car to my mom's boutique. The large two-story boutique looked lonely because it was closed. I stared at the second floor, where the lights seemed to be still on indicating that the place was still inhabited. I went in and went up to the second floor, I did have free access to enter this boutique. I faintly heard the sound of mother's crying behind the door, and the sound of a man with her.

I opened the door without knocking first. The two people who were sitting on the sofa immediately turned their heads towards me in surprise. I stared at the man flatly, I wondered inwardly if he was the mass figure of mother.

"Can you come out for a second?" I looked towards the man. He nodded and walked out of the room.

"Mother." I sat in front of my mother, right in the man's seat.

"Dafa, forgive mom." I looked at my mother's face, her puffy eyes shedding tears again.

"Mom, is this the best thing for me?"

"I'm sorry mom." That's all that came out of his mouth.

"Mom, I can't force anything on you." I looked at his sad face.

"Did your father tell you everything?"

"M." Mmm." I'm nodding.

"Mom can't keep hurting your father, he's a very nice man."

"M." Mmm." Mother, if you know that father is a good man why can't you accept it at all, I can only say inwardly.

"Everything just happens, arranged marriages and marriages that you can't avoid are mistakes that are the beginning of all this." Mother kept shedding tears.

"Mother."

"Your father always treated her well, but she couldn't let go of her feelings for someone she loved very much long before she met your father."

"What was that guy?"

"Yes." Yeah." He's nodding.

"Is my presence in my mother's life also a mistake?"

"No, you're not a mistake at all. You are God's gift to me and your father."

"M." Mmm." I can only nod out of words to say.

"Mother wishes your presence had made us better, but it still hasn't changed. You really can't control your feelings, Dafa." Mother kept sobbing.

"Has mother always met that man all this time?"

"M." Mmm." Mother nodded.

"Did you know?"

"Yes." Yeah." Mother nodded back.

"Hm." I can only nod for the umpteenth time. How could you do this to Dad.

"He was always waiting for mom, Dafa. You can't lie to your own feelings."

"Why can't she leave mom to be happy with dad? Isn't one form of love to give up? Why does she keep coming into mom's life even though she knows she already has a family?" I held a little emotion in my heart.

"We love each other, Dafa. That's what keeps us coming back, coming back and keep coming back."

"Is that why you are?" Mom just nodded and sobbed, I couldn't hate my mother even though I couldn't accept the reason I gave her.

"I'm sorry, Dafa. This is best for mom and dad. We can no longer force each other's feelings."

"Okay mom, hopefully this decision can make you happy."

"I'm sorry, Dafa." Only that word kept being said. Mother hugged me tightly, I returned her embrace. Although my heart aches, but she is still someone who gives birth and takes care of me lovingly.

I told my mom to go back home. I walked out of the room without looking at anyone who was waiting outside. I drove my car away from my mom's boutique, during the journey my feelings were completely unbecoming. Sadness, hurt, disappointment, everything mixed in my head.

I finally realized, no matter what my heart is right now, it will never change anything that happens. I choose to accept everything. Father and mother have decided it all, they must have thought everything well before, until finally taking this path. I kept convincing myself that this was the best for the three of us.

...****************...