My husband, Doctor Adrian

Iba

Adrian sat in the living room. He watched television in silence, which he never did. While I intend to empty the trash can - the garbage can of the entire house. I've been collecting plastic garbage in the kitchen when I saw it.. In the corner of the kitchen, there were dozens of bottles of liquor. Everything's empty. The bottles were intentionally hidden. Instinctively, I opened the top cupboard of the kitchen. There are several other bottles of drink that have not been opened, some are half left.

I walked back to the living room, asking Adrian about the bottles. But, when looking at her peaceful face focused on the television, I undo my intentions. Let it be that if liquor was ever his escape, as long as it wants to change now.

After cleaning the trash and bottles of used drinks, I was about to tidy up our room. I walked to the second floor, Adrian still glued to the television screen. I opened the room that was once our bedroom. Looks like this room hasn't slept in in a long time. Did Adrian sleep in the study? Or did he not sleep at all? I cleaned the room quickly.

I picked up the dirty clothes that were strewn on the floor of the room and put them in the basket. I hugged the basket, intending to bring it down to wash in the washing machine when I saw the nightstand drawer next to the bed slightly open. Iopenit. There are several bottles containing tranquilizers and anti-depressants. My heart was like it was pierced by thousands of needles. I don't know why I feel sorry for Adrian. Is he trying to cover all this up from me? Is he going to pretend to be okay?

I returned to the living room after finishing my task. I stood behind him who was still sitting on the sofa. He looked at me. From his eyes, I knew that he was just trying to be tough. He hung his right hand towards me, asking for my hand as if asking for strength from me. I'm giving. He pulled my hand and kissed it. A warm feeling ran through my whole body. I stroked his head with my other hand.

His eyes were still glued to the television, but I knew he wasn't really watching. I lowered my head, so that it was on par with him. Now I'm like hugging him from behind. He sat on the couch, and I stood up. Our bodies were blocked by the couch.

I whispered to him. "Don't drink anymore.."

I can feel him nodding.

"Don't take any more medicine.."

He nodded again, rubbing my hand that was slung on his shoulder.

I got up from that position, sitting next to him.

I turned my body towards him. He did the same thing to me. Sissy eyes. I could feel the sadness in his heart.

"Promise?" I pointed my little finger at him.

He nodded like a child. "Promise." He links our pinkies.

I felt a great relief in my heart. Adrian wanted to obey me.

"here.." I leaned my back against the back of this long sofa. I hinted that he would lay his head on both of my thighs. He did my orders. His nature is completely different from what I remember. In the past, I was annoyed at him because he looked like a man who didn't know how to love, and it turned out that was the way he was. Now, he looks so helpless. Honestly, I don't even know what caused it to go like this.

I stroked her hair. He looked at the ceiling, his eyes empty. My heart is broken to see it. I don't know what to do to get him back to what he used to be, working and living his dream. I know if it gets pushed, maybe he gets emotional and eventually gets depressed again. So I decided not to force it. I'd better find a little chat topic.

"Tomorrow what to eat?" I said while walking down his face with my fingers.

"Hmm. whatever." she answered briefly. He turned his body to face me. Now his face is right in front of my stomach.

A smile rose on his lips. I know it's her favorite. He nodded slowly.

"OK." I said briefly. "Where's your dissertation?"

He shook slowly. "Later I continue." he said.

He put both his hands around my waist. Body bristling. Maybe he.. wanted that?

"Sorry.." he said slowly.It turns out my guess was wrong.

"For what?" my many.

"I made you lose our baby."

I don't know this guy anymore. This is the first time he has called our baby.

"Shhhhh.. Not salahmu. He's quiet in heaven." I combed her hair with my fingers.

"I don't deserve it." she said softly while hiding her face in my stomach.

"Not worth it?" my question, really don't understand.

"Being a father. I'm just a son of a whore who even killed his own son."

He buried his face in my stomach and cried, as it were. I hugged him tightly, not wanting him to feel this way.

During our courtship and marriage, never once did you open up your past to me. Why now? Why is it only now that I've hurt your feelings about divorce?

"Honey.. Adrian.. Hear me? Ye.. You can't choose which parent you were born with. But look, God gave you Mom and Dad so you could be a better human being. That's all you need to care about.."

I wiped her tears with my thumb.

"And about our son.. It's not your fault at all.. All this is the way." I said again.

I-i know. How soothing my words will never be to make him forget his wounds, his pain. Just like me a few months ago, wanting to die just feels like. But I hope he knows he's not alone. I hope that from the bottom of my heart, one day his heart will recover.