My husband, Doctor Adrian

Setting a New Life

The morning sunlight faintly pierced through the window curtains and blinded my eyes.

Oh, naw. Where'sme?

I remember what happened yesterday while looking around.

Nathan's Apartment.

I hurried to get up. I can't be here. I gotta go home. I should at least comfort Mama, no matter whether she likes it or not.

I intend to sneak around, but.. Nathan's in the kitchen. It looks like a shower, neat.

"You want to go?" tanyakanya.

"Yes, apparently.. I have to go home. My mother was alone." I hesitated.

"alright. But eat first." he said. I nodded as it would be useless to argue with him.

"Ehm... Can I ask you something?" many doubt. He put a plate of sandwiches in front of me, and a plate for him as well.

"Yes, why?" abugn. I accidentally looked into her eyes. His gaze was so friendly, full of kindness.

"What happened last night? I don't remember anything." I said.

"Ehm, I don't know. We drink wine. Then, you seem to be sleepy. I'm taking you to your room, and.."

"And?"

"We don't do anything, La. If that's what you think. I slept in another room. I would never ever do that to anyone." he said. *I would never do that to anyone

I let out a breath. Then, I feel guilty. When I look at him, I should know what kind of man he is.

"Have you got a gap?" tanyakanya.

I'm nodding. "Thank you." I said. It seems like even hundreds of thanks won't be enough to express my feelings for Nathan's kindness. He was strangely always there in the times when I needed help the most.

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After eating, he forced me to drive home. I can't refuse. All the way, we were silent. I was swept away in pain. The wound in my heart that got bigger because of Papa's loss. Moreover, our last meeting was so painful. It made me realize that I had to have a good relationship with my mom. I have to take care of Mama. We both need to be strong.

I woke up from my daydream. Nathan stopped his car. I feel bad for him more and more.

"Sorry" I said quickly. As he saw me about to rush down, he touched the back of my hand briefly with his hand.

"No need to keep apologizing.."

I looked into his eyes.

"May I ask you something?" tanyakanya.

"What?" I asked back.

"Please, if you have any difficulties or need my help.. I exist, really. Call me anytime, I'll come." he assured.

I hesitated. "Steer.."

"Thank you again?" He raised the tip of his lips. "It's down there." he said. I smiled at him. His eyes softened when he saw me smile.

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I knocked on Mama's room door, then ventured to enter. My mother who was sitting on the bed looked at me.

"Lula.. Where'd you come from?" his quiet voice calmed me down.

Ma, are you okay?

I tried to hold back the crying. I have to be strong. For Mama. I have to comfort Mama. It must be harder for him.

Mama fell silent. I don't know what he's thinking. My eyes were fixed on the tray that contained food on the nightstand. Mama hasn't eaten.

"Ma, I'm sorry.." I knelt in front of Mama. Cry broke.

Mama looked surprised. "Why, La?" He forced me to stand with both hands. But, he is not in top condition right now. I kept on my knees and lowered my face, ashamed if he saw me crying.

"La.. You why?" My mother's voice turned loud.

"Sorry, Ma.. Because i'm.. Papa.." I said a hiccup.

"La, what happened to Papa was God's will. It's nobody's fault. Mama feels guilty for Papa, because she has not been the perfect wife for him. She feels guilty for you too, because.. My mom is not a perfect mom." Mama shed tears. I don't believe what I'm hearing. So then.. Mama doesn't hate me? He doesn't blame me at all.

"Ma, please.. Stop blaming yourself, Mama. Mama is the best wife and mother that Papa and Lula have. We both need to be strong, Ma.." I said.

Mama nodded slowly.

Oh my.. This feel? I'm really powerless to see Mama like this God..

"Ma, eat huh? I'm bribe.."

Mama shook her head. Dismissed my hopes for Mama to return to what she used to be. A second later, God answered my prayer. "We ate in the dining room, yuk.." take Mama. I smiled hearing it.

"Yeah, Ma.."

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I spent the day updating my resume and CV. I intend to go back to work. I can't count on Papa's legacy. I have to take care of Mama now. Especially because Papa had been treated for weeks in the hospital, the financial condition of my family became disturbed.

I'm looking for a job with a laptop. I applied to several companies. I know Nathan would be happy to take me back to work. But, I really don't feel good about her. Besides, I also want to stand on my own feet, not bothering anyone.

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Six months later..

Mama is better now. I can't say that he came back the way he used to, but now he can smile, laugh. I was also accepted into a bank as a deputy manager. Indeed, it's a bit down from my position in Nathan's company. But, to be honest I'm glad I got accepted into this new company because I really need a job. Apart from money, I also need to stay busy in order to forget about my grief.

Tonight, just like any other night, I'm overtime. It's seven o'clock now and I'm still busy with my laptop. I'm quite happy, because I've forgotten a little bit about my problems.

"Lula's? You haven't come home yet?" ask my boss, Mr. Richard. He just came out of his room and stopped in front of me when he realized that I was still here. We were both surprised, because usually he always came home early so he never met at the hour like now.

"Ah, yes, sir. I might be done soon. Please go ahead." I said politely.

Mr. Richard is a man in his forties. He was tall and had glasses. He was always polite and kind to me. I'm not close to him, he's a pretty wordy person.

"Okay, I went first" she said, then disappeared behind the elevator.

Shortly after, my phone rang.

Mama

"Hello, Ma?" my answer.

"Lula.. You where? Already on the way home?" ask Mama.

"A little while, Ma.. What's up?"

"Oh this.. Did you go through the supermarket? Mama wants to nitip something, son.."

I let out a breath. I was thinking about going home and taking a hot bath.

"Good, Ma.. Mama whatsapp just want what nitip, later I buy." answered me.

Not until fifteen minutes later, I was getting ready to go home, uh he meant to stop by the supermarket first.