Lord, Accept My Repentance

About Mama

"What?" I asked tightly to look at Farhan who kept looking at me without saying a word.

He looked away while shaking his head, I was confused as to what had happened to him.

"You know you're a woman?"

"That's it, no time!" I answered feeling that Farhan was asking a strange question.

"If you know, why go to their place alone? Especially last night your clothes were so minimal.

If they did anything while you were there how would they? Just a cell phone you didn't even hear the call!"

"In their hangout there is a house and not in the woods where they hang out. So, there can't be anything. The next time I come, their door opens wide."

"Yes, they did that so you'd get close to them. Just like fishing.

You feed first such delicious bait according to the fish, then when the fish has entered your fishing line.

You pulled him up to make him have trouble breathing, not just that. But, you either eat it or sell it to someone else."

I shook my head and turned my gaze back, "You're over-assessing someone. Huh, huh! If we're here, we're just gonna talk about me. I'd better go home!" broke up and wanted to stand off the bench.

"Wait!" prevent Farhan I saw he panicked a little when I threatened to leave.

I put the weight back on the bench, he took a rough breath and stared back at the stretch of water in front of us.

"I beg you, don't make Mama wait for you and worry like last night" said Farhan who made me link my eyebrows.

"My father and sister had an accident when they went out at night to buy Mama's gift at that time.

However, it is unfortunate that they have to crash with a sleepy truck. That night was just 8.

His name is also destiny. Mama was so anxious and waited for the two of them at home, until 11 p.m.

Me, Mama and Brother got a call from the hospital telling me that Papa and my sister are dead.

Mama hates herself, because sponge cake is also a gift that is still near them given by the police.

According to Mama, it was because they both died. That's why, Mama always tied your hair like a child.

Because, Mama is not satisfied yet to tie my sister's hair. I'm sorry if Mama's treatment might seem excessive to you.

Moreover, you are not children who should be shunned like a child. But that's all that makes Mama happy.

When I asked for permission to stay at your house, Mama also asked if there was a daughter in the house?

And I immediately answered yes, it turns out Mama followed to your place and instead told Bibik to return home," said Farhan who made me stunned.

My mom looks so loving to me. In fact, I'm not who he is. He waited for me last night.

Invited me and accompanied me to study, because he had lost and felt that I was a substitute for his dead son.

He finally looked at me, I stared at him until I finally stared at the white sand on this beach.

"Have it been a long time?" ask after a long silence.

"Half years ago."

"No effect on my mom?"

"You think?" farhan asked which made me stare at him silently.

"Mama was almost crazy to even enter the RSJ and had to go back and forth to the psychologist for that matter."

"Have it?" I'm not less surprised by the story just now. Farhan turned his gaze and nodded steadily.

I flinch, not knowing that Farhan's life is this bad. In fact, it might be worse than me.

"Wait a minute, I'll buy you a drink first" he cut and I said a nod.

Mama's ass is so weird in my opinion, like a man who's so scared of losing me. If he never happens anything in his life.

He'll either be normal to me or impressed that he doesn't care because I'm not his real son.

"Now" said Farhan, giving me a young coconut.

"Thanks," I said and drank the water so that this dry throat was wet again.

***

We came home at 1pm according to Mama's words, I thought it was just a lie to the mall. Apparently, right.

After the beach, Farhan and I went to the mall to accompany her to buy a gift for Mama's birthday tomorrow.

I don't want to lose, pretending to buy snacks but it turns out to be a gift for Mama too.

Choosing a prayer at the mall after that ride home online taxi back, "What time would you like a surprise for Mama?" ask me when we're going into the house.

"Four 12 nights."

I just nodded without telling you I was going to celebrate my mom's birthday.

"Assalamualaikum," our greetings in unison.

"I go into the room first, yes, let the ball not look like Mama" whispered Farhan and I replied with a nod.

I closed the door again and looked for Mama's whereabouts, apparently Mama was in the kitchen cooking.

"Eh, you guys are home? How about a greeting, anyway?" mama stared at me.

"Haha, we've already greeted Ma. But, Mama who is too focused like it is," I said with rarity.

"Well, yeah? Hadeh ... Mama's too focused on the cooking."

"Hehe, not papa Ma. Just go ahead, Nazwa wants to put things in the room first, yeah."

Mama nodded and stroked my head gently, "Where's Mama?" farhan asked as we were walking down the street.

"In the kitchen" I said and went into the room.

I put a snack on the mattress, remove the accessories on the body and return to the kitchen to eat.

"Call Brother there" Mama told Farhan when I got to the kitchen.

"Anything's home yet?"

"Not yet, he said he'd like to spend one night here."

"Well?"

"I don't know, I woke up. Nazwa is hungry, you know," said Mama who made me shake.

In fact, I am not too hungry because my mind is still focused on the story of Farhan. Thankfully, I did not rebel against my mother.

Farhan said, Mama can return pain if you feel depressed or heartache so deep in someone.

And I was so afraid, if it happened to me without me noticing. It's like there's a responsibility I'm now carrying.

We ended up eating together with occasional questions and laughing together, Mama seemed so happy with what was happening now.

"Nazwa, you're not going out tonight, are you?" mama asked suddenly who switched the conversation.

I was immediately puzzled, I looked towards Farhan by chewing food. The man threw away his sight.

"Mm .. I don't think so, ma. But, Nazwa does not know as well," said I who was confused what to answer.