Look At Me Once

Tahajud with you

“Mas Al ...” call Anisa with a raucous voice, her eyes still tightly closed.

“It's not yet time for dawn prayers, dear. Sleep again,” said Alwi while caressing the cheeks of his wife who is still closed.

“Hair I fall off constantly,” the milk on my beloved husband.

“It's okay, Honey. Do not think strangely, yes ... focus on your recovery.”

“I'm no longer beautiful, huh, Mas?” tanyanya sad.

“Sstttt, darling, you are always beautiful in my eyes and heart.” Alwi said it even though there was pain in the bottom of his heart.

Anisa grabbed her husband's hand, she held his fingers. “Have you heard of Lathifa?”

Alwi was just speechless unable to answer the question posed by his wife, Anisa who did not get an answer she slowly opened her eyelids.

“Mas ...” call Anisa slowly.

“Im sorry, Mas, Darling. Mas has not been able to find the whereabouts of Lathifa,” replied Alwi bowed, he could not see the eyes of his wife who was always expecting news from Lathifa.

“Tonight I want tahajud with you, Mas.”

Alwi looked at the face of his wife who was getting thinner, chubby cheeks that used to look very adorable are now just a mere memory.

Alwi helps Anisa to stay, it is not possible for Anisa to ablaze in the bathroom because of her weak body condition as well as some medical devices attached to her body make Anisa unable to move as she pleases.

Alwi also helped his wife to wear the mukena, although always helping the needs of Anisa, but in the slightest Alwi never felt burdened with the situation of his wife, he said, Alwi patiently and sincerely took care of Anisa wholeheartedly.

“Allahu Akbar.” Alwi said takbir and started his tahajud, followed by his wife who became his aunt.

Although her body lay weak on top of leaving the hospital, Anisa never left her obligations to Robnya.

Despite the pain he felt, plus the effects of various drugs that entered his body. Although Anisa never complained about all her suffering, as much as possible Anisa kept it to herself, she did not want to add to the worries of those who had been by her side.

In the silence of the night, the couple specifically went to worship solely because of God.

“Assalamualaikum warahmatullaah ..” Alwi said a greeting sign he had finished his prayer.

Not to forget that Alwi offered the perfect prayer of his evening prayer, he praised the Greatness and Greatness of God, the Creator of the universe, the place to ask for forgiveness and protection and the All-Knowing of all things.

In her bed, Anisa also guaranteed every prayer offered by her husband.

‘Yes Allah, Yes Rob... Eliminate the pain on the body of the servant wife. Cure ... Thou art the Most Healing, there is no healing except the healing of Thy, O Rob ...  Give painless healing to Anisa, lift her illness.’ Alwi fervently prayed in his heart, tears did not escape soaking his increasingly thin cheeks.

‘Yes God, give your guidance, show your power. Find us with Lathifa and Hana's mother, guard and protect them wherever they are. Give an opportunity to the servant to make amends for all the faults of the servant, O Allah ..’

Anisa closed her eyes, her heart was sad to hear her husband's sobbing. Although she never saw her husband crying in front of her, Anisa often heard the voice of Alwi as unwilling to hold her cry at night.

‘Yes Allah, O our Lord .. Forgive all our sins, I ask You. I testify that You are the God of the whole people, there is no God but You the Most One. Accept all the sins that my husband has committed to You, aamiin.’

After the prayer, Alwi folded his alphabet DNA returned it to its original place, then he walked closer to his wife's gurney.

“Tomorrow you have to go to the office, Mas.” Anisa persuades her husband to return to take care of her company.

“There was Abi and Raiyan who took care of it, Darling,” Alwi replied casually, the same answer every time Anisa asked him to return to work.

“It's been 5 months you left the office, Mas. Don't you feel sorry for Abi? He is old and should rest at home, not-”

“Sstt, yes, you know I just want to accompany you here,” replied Alwi quickly cut the sentence often spoken by his wife.

“Why don't I just die, Mas?” chirp Anisa makes Alwi instantly lose his calm that he just felt lost after performing night prayers together.

“Honey!” reprimanding Alwi did not like, his heart seemed to be pinched with the words of his wife.

“I don't like to trouble everyone, Mas,” said Anisa lirih.

“No one feels bothered, dear. Everyone loves you, last night Imi visited and prayed for your recovery.

Anisa looks moody, she can withstand the pain in her body but not by looking at the sadness on the faces of those she cares about.

Since Anisa is not allowed outpatient care, Alwi faithfully takes care of his wife. Even when Anisa was in a coma for nearly a month, she had to miss several mediation summonses over the lawsuit Lathifa filed against her.

Lathifa never attended the trial, so exactly a month ago the court certified her divorce with Lathifa. But all of that is still kept secret from Anisa, fearing that Anisa's health will decline again.

“Sleep again, yes ... later when it's dawn I wake up.” Alwi confirmed the blanket on his wife's body, he stroked Anisa's head while looking at her face without turning away.

Alwi is now a little used to the complaints of his wife who feels troublesome for many people, although never said sick, Alwi often caught Anisa hiding the moans of her pain.

It is not easy to become Anisa, a chronic disease suffered, cancer that attacks her stomach has now gnawed and spread to other organs and of course very difficult life.

Alwi did not allow anyone to help clean his wife's body every day, not even his mother-in-law. Alwi himself did all this alone.

...****************...

Elsewhere, in a village away from the hustle of the city. Seen a young woman with an enlarged stomach condition was busy concocting vegetables in a simple kitchen.

Even though his movements were hampered by the condition of his body, he did not complain at all that even his face was already covered in sweat drenching his forehead.

“Rest first, Thif. Don't be too tired, let the mother finish it all,” said Hana's mother who had just entered the kitchen.

“No, Mom. I don't want to just be quiet and I can still help,” replied Lathifa smiling tirelessly.

“Ya already, but remember not too tired yes, remember your baby also needs rest.”

“Iya, Mom. Later if I'm tired I'll rest.”

“You've been in the kitchen since dawn, Thif. Don't push yourself,” said Ms. Hana.

“I'm fine, Bu.” Lathifa smiled at her mother, indicating that she was okay.

Bu Hana looked at her daughter with a sad feeling, she looked at the young girl in front of her. An appearance that could be said to be far from word worthy for a child of his age.

A simple game whose color has even faded, his gamis that was forced to be used by his poor son.

‘I'm sorry, Thif. I can't make you happy.’

...****************...

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