The Little Doomsday of My Heart

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Almost half a year has passed, but the world has not improved. Alya's hopes of graduating on time seemed to fade slowly because he was experiencing distress during his thesis guidance. Although the campus provides online guidance facilities, but for Alya it is still less effective. Moreover, the lecturer will reply at the earliest 2 weeks later. Unlike the case if face-to-face directly, Alya can intensely meet the supervisor for the sake of smooth thesis.

In this final semester Alya really use to be more productive. Given that there are no more courses that he must take online because his main focus at this time is just thesis. While waiting for a reply from his guidance counselor, Alya used his free time to go to the boarding school where he used to go. Alya voluntarily helped the boarding school and channeled the knowledge he had, although initially Alya felt unable. Meeting with his classmates and some friends who one generation with him used to make Alya excited. The more the day the thinner the shadow of Kaffa flashed through his mind.

"How are you doing Al ? since graduating we have never met again" said one of his friends channeled longing through a warm embrace.

"Good alhamdulillah, you are here too, how are you ? are your lectures online too ?" ask Alya.

"I'm good. I didn't go to Al's college, my parents didn't have the money to pay me. So I chose to serve in the cottage helping the caretakers here"

"Oh I'm sorry, I really don't know" Alya replied guiltily as she was afraid that her friend would take offense to her question.

"No problem. Can I have your phone number or WhatsApp number ? so we can establish a friendship even though later you have been active in college again"

"yes too. Where's your phone ? let me put it in"

"Well already. Then just call yes let me save the number" said Alya give back his friend's phone.

"If your instragram is what ?"

"Well Instagram ? I don't have any"

"Well, what a pity Alya. As long as you're in the lodge, I think you'll use technology to preach after you graduate from this lodge or channel what you love"

Alya looked down confused at the words of her friend.

Her night at home...

The words of his friend in the cottage earlier were very disturbing Alya's mind. How can Alya preach, while being in the city actually makes him forget about religion. The pesantren was forgotten by him.

Alya stretched her body. For a moment he thought closing his eyes. Breathe slowly so that he can calm down. A second later Alya picked up her phone, looking around for one of the apps she had never touched. Even the application can be on his mobile phone because Kaffa downloaded it at that time. Alya remembered when Kaffa borrowed his phone to download it because there was a college assignment that he had to upload. Because Kaffa's phone was broken.

Instagram yes Instagram.. The app mentioned by her friend.

Alya knows if the application is very famous and good if used. Alya wanted to have an Instagram account. But a memory was replayed by his brain. The time when Kaffa forbade him to use the app and he just complied. Never mind using Instagram, uploading the status on WhatsApp alone Kaffa angry. Not wanting to disappoint her loved ones, Alya unwittingly seems to be controlled according to Kaffa's wishes. Now Alya realized, that she had indeed changed because she was restrained.

"What now I just make an Instagram account. That's right what Siti said. Through Instagram, I can share whatever I like. I can develop myself without having to be restrained again" Alya muttered.

Alya started to find out first on YouTube how to use Instagram. How to create an Instagram account. Seeing the shows made Alya more enthusiastic. According to him, there are many people who like the application because the appeal is so great. Alya just found out even Instagram can make money for people who have a lot of followers.

"Geez, where have I been all this time. It feels out of date" Alya muttered.

Almost an hour later, Alya felt that she understood enough to use it. With his bright face, for the first time he touched the application.

But his smile slowly faded. The initial look he opened was very much different than what he saw on YouTube. Precisely there is access to the Kaffa account. Alya remembered something from what she had learned earlier.

For a moment Alya just looked at her mobile screen. Keep looking at Kaffa's Instagram account written there. At first Alya thought to just take it out. But somehow his feelings say different things, as if he continues to encourage him to open the account and find out what Kaffa does in it. The longer he looked, the greater the curiosity piled up in his heart.

Alya convinced herself. Slowly open the account. I don't know what Alya wants to look for, but his finger goes according to his conscience.

First Alya only saw 1 post on the Instagram account. Posts about Kaffa's college assignments at that time. Then his eyes glanced at the few Kaffa followers. When he saw it, it was only the big accounts that Kaffa followed.

Alya went on to post posts that Kaffa liked and Kaffa saved. It also looks like everything is fine. Kaffa also never uploaded any status.

Alya shifted on the search page Kaffa. Alya was quite surprised because there were so many accounts of women that Kaffa was looking for there. Including accounts of close friends. But Alya's eyes were focused on one account named Abira. Instantly his heart returned cold, but his curiosity was greater than that. Alya wants to see Abira's Instagram. Thirty minutes Alya spent looking at all of Abira's posts, making Alya just feel embarrassed because of all the contents about da'wah.

With a little effort not to think about it, Alya further shifted on the home page. His eyes were again focused on the notification and message icon there. Alya did a long scroll on the Kaffa notification page but found no oddities.

Alya looked for a moment at the wall clock in her room that had shown ten o'clock at night. Actually the time Alya had to rest for the sake of his health, but somehow he wanted to continue his activities.

Alya shifted on the message icon and opened it. Again Alya was surprised to see so many messages from the women. Alya's eyes focused on the message that was at the top. Malika, Malika's account is written there. With growing curiosity, Alya opened it.

At first Alya did not think strangely of his close friend, but the first message Alya saw was...

"yes sweetheart"

Reading those 2 words suddenly made Alya close her mouth. His heart was really beating uncharacteristically, his breathing felt a little tight. He could not believe what he was seeing. Alya blinked repeatedly, but still the writing did not change.

With an unsettled feeling, Alya decided to look at their message from the beginning. The lower the more Alya's tears slowly began to go down wet her cheeks. Alya's heart grew even more painful when she heard Kaffa's voicemail saying...

"I love you Malika"

So too was answered by the same speech with Malika. The more reading the messages made Alya's tears come out. Alya started to feel pain in her chest, but she tried to endure it all.

"O Allah" said Alya so softly clutching his chest.

Alya shouted not because of the pain in her chest, but read the message of those who were talking about intimate relationships. Yes, the same intimate relationship that Alya had with Kaffa.

Alya's heart which he initially slowly began to heal, it was getting destroyed irregularly. His hands were trembling, those tears had even made the island wet its pillow. In disbelief he had to accept that Malika was related to Kaffa even today.

With a deep sense of sadness, Alya captured the screen of the entire message.

.

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seriate..