The Beautiful Doctor is My Mother

Nestapas

After you left, did you know? I am still the happiest looking person. I showed the world I was a strong man. What people don't know: on the lonely sides of my day, the memories we've been through come tormenting me. Day after day I went through hard. As it turns out, that love that is said to be simple can make my life so complicated. I'm asking myself to talk to myself. Strengthened hearts time and time again. Wishing you came to calm me down. It's just, for so long I waited for you to never come that time.

You should never have left me. For me, losing you is one of the worst things about falling in love with you. The wishful thinking I had wanted all this time, was now fading and deathly pale. The feeling that was spilled, was now chapped in the heart.

Where are you today? The loving words you said, the attention that was stuck, are now gone. The days of disappointment came and I became an accomplished sage. You don't even know how deep I fell on you. Your loss is probably a measure of how big this feels. Like an intoxicating fall in heart, a broken heart overcomes me.

Can you stay here for a moment without leaving.

Follow me tired of breaking myself down.

Can you hold on, never let go.

All the beautiful things that are memories.

Have you ever learned to understand? That forgetting you is a long, hollow path that I must take on my own. I have to step slowly, so as not to fall and still be able to get to the goal. That's the simple reason I don't want to look at your eyes again the next day. I was afraid, I fell again in the same hole, with the same wound. This sadness takes a long time to recover. Stay away so I can live my life as I should.

--boycandra, in the book "An Effort of Forgetting."

Perhaps my love story is more bitter and tragic than just a novel that has been written by several experienced writers.now the author of my story is much more powerful, and, tossed my heart to him even though I tried my hardest to forget him.

Despite the pain I feel, I don't let your heart make you feel the same pain as me. The loss of someone you may have loved as much as you can.

The car drove between the toll lines, the speed of the vehicle I felt was getting faster. I was still silent, occasionally staring at him behind tears that had not dried on my face. pain, yesaaa thousands of pain tonight attacked me, I was still in pain, how not even people I just know have been able to see the pain that I have been saving myself.like a wound, this heart there is a festering scratch that can not be closed just by sewing it.

This woman cunningly, took the car along the highway. I don't know where exactly this woman will take me, I just kept quiet with occasional glance at her. I know maybe she was letting me talk, I know, and make peace with my heart. Can I???...

I see, this woman behind the wheel took the phone out of her pocket.A split minute in her brain ornate handphone with one hand holding the phone and the other holding the steering wheel, then in the play of a song that I do not know the title but the lyric lyrics are getting cut to my heart as if this song was created for me.

With the voice of the man who rowed the dayuh, the music that seemed to increase the pain of this wound. more or less like this lyrics..

Long enough love we built, long enough

Enough of our struggle, enough of it

To build a beautiful mahligai

A happy home

But now what's happening

I can't believe you're unfaithful, I can't believe

I didn't expect this to be the end, I didn't expect it

You created a festive party in between my tears

I set up a building of love on my wound

You threw myself into the valley of suffering

You obliterate my hope, you obliterate it

I ruined my whole life, you ruined it

I hope your prayers are for me

To keep my heart strong always

Undergo this my creak

Until the end of my life

I accept this bitterness, I accept

‘And I brought this heart wound, ‘I brought it.

" does this song add to your pain?? " he asked me, I was made stunned from my backrest.I did not answer him, instead I closed my eyes while I sharpened my ear hearing to hear all the words he said.

" you may enjoy the song, please enjoy with your pain throughout this journey, but when you arrive at your destination, I hope you can forget it along with your pain .. "

" i'll show you that the world is vast, not just about him, not just about your pain.. "

" i know doctors don't really sleep when they close their eyes. And I believe doctors hear every word I say. have doctors ever read a book or a novel ?? " i still don't want to answer every question, but I'm still faithful to hear it.

" Killing desolate is terrible and exhausting. They are many and inexhaustible. You kill one deserted, then ten deserted will come later. That's one of the quotes of a book called DESOLATE KILL ATTEMPT that I have read over and over again.whether true or not, that's one of the quotes of a book called DESOLATE KILL ATTEMPT that I've read over and over again, maybe because of the doctor's past woman, doctors prefer to be friends with a lonely, do doctors not want to kill him?? "

My mind floated over between closed eyes, deep in my heart I wanted to forget about it and kill every quiet thing I felt every day.