Status I Never Wanted

Feeling Coveted And Concerned

When I got home I was silent without any reaction. It was like a feeling I didn't want to convey to anyone.

Until I unconsciously laughed, then the next second grieved, and the next minute I began to talk to myself on the next again began to throw whatever objects near me in any direction.

Then next I shouted - screaming and scratching - scratching my head while crying uncontrollably. My condition like this also makes all my family feel sorry and concerned and sad made.

Because usually they see me as a person who is careless and always friendly to anyone and open to anyone.

But this time I still mutely do not want to tell the problem and cause I became like this. It's impossible that my circumstances have been so messed up that I can't even recognize myself.

After I was content to scream - I screamed and started hurting myself by hitting, scratching and so much more that I did to my body.

Until my body looks so horrible. Because of the amount of blood and scratches on my body this is what I do.

Then after I was content to vent my anger, I fell unconscious from being tired of all this. Besides being tired from screaming - yelling I am also tired of the reality that I accept at this time.

Then my family approached me who had fallen unconscious. And took me to my room to make me come back to my senses and give me medicine so that when I woke up I could regain control of my emotions.

The wounds on my body have been cleaned and treated. Which now has a lot of bandages in my body to bandage the wounds on my body.

They then began to try to provide a solution and until finally the decision of the conversation was decided. That I'd be put in a mental hospital in the area around where I live.

So that I can recover. Why they decided to go to that place. It was because they were afraid that I could hurt people around me. Moreover, they were afraid that I would hurt my little daughter.

I will never be living in the same house with my daughter. Until finally the decision was agreed by them.

When I woke up from my fainting. I feel a headache in my head. In addition, the pain all over my body due to the wounds I made myself in my body.

I spread my vision around my room. Then I remembered about that man whom he had been in this room.

Remembering the sweet treatment to me first. It made me smile on my own, but in the next minute I remembered her treatment of me when I had given birth to her baby. He betrayed me, chided me, and separated me from my son whom I had not seen his face at all. Even just to hold her and hug her I was not given a chance by her.

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