Love Stifled By Destiny's

Still Accompanying the Holidays

A whack of fatigue should stretch the muscles immediately, to take a leave of absence from work. The mind that is always drained is like an undead, betahan for the sake of a beloved child who still needs my love.

The body just lies limp feeling the entire muscle begins to stiffen. The feeling of dizziness began to whack too. Just want to seek treatment it feels too bad at all money, which is more important to meet our needs. Moreover, plus the mother who continues in a sickly state, so the money is kept tight so as not to carelessly use, if afraid he will come drop.

Tok .. tok, the door has been knocked slowly.

"Can Kayla come in, Ma!" His permission has opened the door.

"Here ...here, Son. Just come in," tell me to move my hand in approval.

"I'm sorry Kayla interfered with the break, Mama."

"It's okay, son. I'm just taking a break from soy sauce."

"Truly Kayla didn't bother you, did she?" ask in doubt.

"Yes, baby."

Hands that began to be weak due to age, have gently stroked the hair of the favorite girl who is being strung elongated.

"What about school?" Want to know what progress is happening.

"Thank God be good, Ma."

His attitude, which is now spoiled, immediately hugged my body in a sitting position.

"Thank God then."

"Yes, Ma. Kayla misses Mama very much. It felt like Mama was always present with Kayla," Her hoarse voice was still hugging.

The messy hair on my face had been moved near my ears, so as not to cover his face again.

"Yes, Son. You are patient, yes. All these storms will pass. Never despair of praying for the good of our family" I replied trying to calm him down.

"Yes, Ma. Kayla did not forget to also pray for papa, so that we can all quickly gather again like before. Kayla, I'm sure your dad just disappeared and doesn't remember us, it doesn't mean he's dead as a body" a child who believes.

"Yes, Son. Mama also believes that papa is still alive. Maybe he's just forgetting about us now, until ten years have passed but we're not together yet" I said.

"Mama is also patient and always sincere in living this all. God is not sleeping, surely our prayers will soon be answered.

"Amin, Son."

"Obviously we should never give up looking for Papa. Even though things will change, you must still love Papa," my command sounded heartbreaking.

"Yes, Ma. Kayla understands that."

"Maybe this sense of loss is not strong, compared to the taste that is in Mama. Must be days, months, even years Mama's been holding everything in pain."

"That's it, son. But all are patient. May this fortitude bear fruit someday."

Once again my dear child has clutched my body tightly. We were both washed away in memory, so unstoppably we both shed tears.

There was nothing we could do, only the surrender happened. I don't know, where else to look? We are all tired of going around. Let God run the play of this world, as a man can only surrender and be patient.

Long time talking to my son. There was a lot he said about friends and school lessons. Didn't expect if his little hands were always the one I always held, now his fingers began to extend the sign he had grown older.

*****

Three days of asking for leave. In addition to resting the body, try to take the time to be with family. It feels longing to feel this togetherness, after so many years of the night squeezing sweat.

"Hi, Mum. What else to plant, huh?" I had approached him in the garden behind the house.

The vast land yesterday, I bought with money from the rest of the sale of the parents' house. Although the house is not as good as it used to be, the important thing is that we can take shelter from the hot sun and rain.

"Eeh, you son. Mother's planting yams again, nih. In addition to the leaves can be for vegetables, 'the results will later be resold, '" he explained.

"That's it, Mom." Hands have tried to help to stick the stalk of the yam tree.

"Did Kayla go to school?" ask him back.

"Yes, it was already good."

Eyes swept throughout the garden. There are so many vegetables that he has planted. Very diligent and painstaking. He said besides being able to side dishes to eat by himself, if the harvest can be sold and our financial additions.

There are chilies, purple eggplants, tomatoes, spinach, yams, bananas, and so forth. The garden is almost full of various plants, the results of which can be resold. The old hand was still painstakingly doing everything. Maybe we know that our finances are running out, so he was looking for ideas to try to use the garden.

The sweat that drips repeatedly wants to be wiped, when the hot sun just shines on our bodies. His hands were full of land, it seemed like it was already hard to just wipe it for a while.

"Thank you, son!" he said he was amazed when I wiped his sweat using a long-sleeved shirt.

"It's okay, Mom. Don't get too tired of work, it's important to keep your health awake and fit" I said.

"Yes, Son. Thank you, you're always there for Mom. Can't answer anything but the best prayer for you" he said.

Tests, his tears are always unstoppable.

"Together, Mom. Don't say that, or feel that way. Amel was once a mother's son and will forever remain so. Although I am not a biological child born from your womb, but this affection will never break to continue loving you wholeheartedly," replied hoarsely as it began to drift in sadness.

"Yes, Son. Thank you." Thank you."

"Yes, Mom. Don't be sad anymore. It's not good if we constantly dissolve in sadness."

"Emm."

I finally want to cry again, too, so I don't cry anymore. Health that continues to decline, always makes this heart not calm. Life is always haunted by fear and sadness, because all energy has been drained away thinking that people who are uncertain will appear when.