This Is Not What I Want

Grandma coolers

greetings from readers and users of mangatoon, hopefully someone still survives to read my novel, sorry if less greget, still learning this. Hopefully it can be useful for readers of the course. Continue yuk...

It was almost noon when we arrived at my grandmother's house. I was impatient, Arman just turned off the bike and parked it, I hurried to run and get into the house.

"grandmother...Grannies... Neeek up! Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh!" I screamed while looking for grandma in every corner of the room in the house.

"Waalaikumsalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh, do not have to shout so Ri, grandma already knows you want to come," grandma out of the kitchen, bring a bowl of vegetables chicken pindang my favorite.

"Who told Grandma that Riri wanted to come?" I looked at Grandma's face seriously, while taking over the bowl she was carrying.

"Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh Nek," Arman entered and kissed Grandma's right hand.

After putting the vegetable bowl on the dining table. I hugged Grandma tight, "Mr... Riri lives here just like Grandma, like she used to." Unknowingly, these tears were dripping and wetting Grandma's shoulders.

"Waalaikumsalam warahmatullahi wabarakatuh, enter nak Arman, and Riri sits first. Grandma wants a story."

I sat next to Grandma, if I remember I was very disappointed, when Mama preferred to leave me at grandma's house. Even without ever visiting. Almost cry every year miss the affection of Mama, feel envious of my brother and sister. But from day to day, and until today, I finally feel very grateful, lucky I have been living with my grandmother. Getting guidance and mentoring from Grandma, while the other grandchildren do not. I feel my heart is much more tightly bound to Grandma.

"Riri, and Arman, this is just a story of the past, not to unlock the disgrace, but take a lesson from it and throw away its ugliness." Grandma started her story.

I left Grandma alone with Arman, to make drinks in the kitchen.

"Sorry Nek, earlier, Arman apologized for bringing Riri here, without giving any news. Riri looks restless Nek, since Kak Tiwi came home. Riri does seem ordinary, his attitude, his school is lived as usual, but there is a different taste Nek." Papar Arman on grandma, take the chance mumpung Riri is not there.

"Grandmother knows Arman loves Riri, grandma is the same," she fell silent as I returned from the kitchen.

"Please drink Sis, and this is Grandma's favorite sweet tea." I served the tea I made, then sat back down next to Grandma.

"Riri put it this way, (grandmother paused, sipped a little tea, then continued the story), What are you really afraid of Tiwi's return?"

"Kok Grandma so ask, not tell a story?" I'm rattled.

Arman interjected, "Riri to be honest with your feelings, I brought you here because I want you to be cheerful again, not pretend to be happy. Maybe you can't pour out your feelings for Mama, if you want to be alone with grandma, I'll go out." Arman started to move, but I rushed to prevent it.

"Grandmother, Brother Arman, honestly Riri is happy for Kak Tiwi to come home, but obviously something is different, something is not right. Riri is afraid, if Kak Tiwi will return as before, Ri heard from Mama, the sister chose to completely part with her papa Kiki, while she herself could not take care of the child properly, if Riri goes to college, who helps mom? And Nek, Ri is afraid yes now Brother Arman does not mind the situation of Riri and Riri's family, but Riri is embarrassed to remember the behavior of his brother. Not that Riri felt the truest and the kindest. But...Ri is afraid of Nek, the more Ri, prays and hopes that the opposite happens."

After saying everything, I fell silent, I cried.

"Grandmother, Arman really wants to be serious with Riri, Arman's parents have also agreed. We've applied personally to Riri and Mama." Arman showed me the ring on the ring finger of both hands.

"Then Riri has to how's Nek?"

"Be ordinary, do not take revenge, because one's heart is not easily turned back, only God can change Kak Tiwi, will be good or bad. And why would the Tiwi problem affect your relationship with Arman?" Grandma looked at me lovingly.

"Sorry Brother Arman, Riri is worried that your feelings will change if something of this self will change over time, from what Riri knows most people choose a life partner also from the seeds of weight and bebetnya."

"Miss, Riri is really scared, but all this is because Riri also loves her brother and Riri's family, wants this family like other families are happy and harmonious, all well-off and loving each other."

"What looks beautiful on the outside is not necessarily beautiful inside. Every family has their own problems. What matters is that you're a real school and a grandmother's pride, and if Arman chooses you then he's ready for all your risks and shortcomings." Grandma hugged and kissed my forehead.

"Let's eat first, grandma has cooked Riri's favorite, so hopefully Arman also likes."

Grandma invited us to eat together.

After eating, we went to Grandma's citrus garden, lucky we had some fruits that could be harvested, "Asyiik can try freshly ripe oranges on the tree!" I thank you so much, having found an orange tree, which almost all the fruit is ready for harvest.

I thought about all of Grandma's advice, and I wasn't good with Arman either, finally she knew that there was still doubt in my heart, really I was afraid that her heart would change, if I go to college we'll be useful but long-distance. Can he be trusted? Lest I'm the one who can't be trusted. Ah have lived first everything in sight, rather than worrying too much about things that have not happened. Praying is fine.

Grandma actually asked us to stay the night, but it seemed like it was better for us to go home. That's what I was thinking.

"Riri want to go home or stay here?" Ask Grandma.

"Tomorrow holidays, right, we'll just stay here first huh?" Now it's Arman who doesn't want to go home.

"Alright, Riri is also still missing Grandma.

Is it really okay not to go home?"

I looked at Arman.

Arman just nodded his head.

That night we also stayed at Grandma's house, I could sleep with Grandma like before. Arman slept in the guest room. My heart is at least calmer, I have to believe in Arman and myself, of course, the important thing is to focus on my school.

I hope tomorrow will be better.

Sometimes life doesn't always go hand in hand with what we want. Whatever happens may it be a reinforcement for our lives.

Thank you who are still willing to read my novel, hopefully it will be finished soon, do not forget to like comments and votes huh? thank you🙏🙏💖💖💖